


Book 1 - Dying Stars

by nmirah



Series: Warriors: The Power of Three (Rewrite/AU) [1]
Category: Warriors - Erin Hunter
Genre: AU, AU where Jay trains as a warrior, Mothwing and Leafpool are mates, Po3 rewrite, Warrior cats rewrite
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-12
Updated: 2018-10-27
Packaged: 2019-01-16 08:03:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 45,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12338688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nmirah/pseuds/nmirah
Summary: "Okay, Jaykit, I believe in you." Leafpool stretched forwards and licked the top of his head. "I know you can do it. I just..." she sighed. "It will be hard. You will face obstacles in every direction if you take this path.""Because I'm blind?""No, because others will know that you are different, and try to discourage you." Jaykit swallowed at her words, nodding."I know. But nothing will stop me from being a warrior.""Oh Jaykit," Leafpool purred. "Someday, you'll wow us all."





	1. Things that have changed

**Author's Note:**

> Find me and art for this fic at http://nmirah.tumblr.com/! I will (eventually) put the art in the fic as well. Thanks!

First off - Hi! Thank you for considering reading my Warriors AU! As always, this project is made with a lot of love and nostalgia for the Warriors series, and the fandom that is absolutely incredible. I love the Warriors books, but I do think that the Po3 and OotS series are incredibly lacking in diversity, plot and realism. It gives something to be desired, and that's where this AU comes in! This AU centers around Jay and Holly and their lives through Po3 and some of OotS. I am revamping the plot to resemble something more to my liking, and am always open to taking suggestions from others so feel free to comment or send some to me anytime. As any AU, since I can change whatever I want, I've gone ahead and made things different from the beginning to introduce a new, and hopefully more interesting, set of circumstances.

Thanks! -Nmirah

 

Things that have changed:

Some of the characters have changed their looks to resemble their parents more closely. I am in no way attempting to create genetically accurate characters, as I think that would make them unrecognisable for the most part, however I wanted them to _seem_ possible, just as Brambleclaw seems possible because of his resemblance to his father Tigerstar, though realistically he should be golden like his mother. As an example to what I changed, I made Cinderheart a dilute tortoiseshell instead of a pure grey cat, as it makes more sense with her red father and calico mother. As well, I have gotten rid of the Cinderpelt reincarnation plot. I think it undermines an amazing character and leaves us missing Cinderpelt anyways! So Cinderpelt will be a character in StarClan for us to see!

Brambleclaw stepped down after his fight with Hawkfrost. He was scarred badly on one side of his face, impairing his vision slightly in his right eye. He did not lose the eye, but the skin around it tightened, so he has a permanent squint there. Firestar did not want him to step down, but Brambleclaw did not wish to become power hungry like his brother and father, and he was devastated that he had to kill Hawkfrost, as he loved him very much. Brambleclaw grew closer to Mothwing through their shared grief, and he told her the whole truth of what had happened. They are good friends.  
Soon after, Brambleclaw asked Firestar to change his name to Brambleflower to honour his mother, as she passed away less than a moon after Hawkfrost's death. With this name change, Brambleflower finally let his connection to Tigerclaw die away.

Firestar made Brackenfur deputy in his stead.

Rainwhisker did not die in between series. However, Barkface did.

Crowfeather never trained to be a warrior. He was trained as a medicine cat, and continued his training when he returned. There was no romance between him and Leafpool, and he did not sire any kits. Breezepelt does not exist.

Longtail was not banished to the elders den, but instead he slept there only to keep Mousefur company, since Goldenflower chose to take care of new mothers in the nursery while she was still alive. He did not return to full warrior duties because of the loss of his sight; his clanmates discouraged him from leaving the camp as they were worried for his safety. Instead, he spent a lot of time creating stories for the apprentices and kits, and is one of the most beloved cats in the clan. He was the biggest help in repairing and building dens, and the warriors always went to him with questions for construction. He also spent a lot of time in the medicine den, learning all the scents of the plants to heighten his sharp sense of smell. He officially became an elder just after Brackenfur was appointed deputy, developing arthritis in his hips. He doesn't walk much anymore, but he always helps those who come to him with an issue.

Instead of the Crowfeather plot, Leafpool ran away with Mothwing so the two could be together, but with the badger attack she returned and gave up her future with Mothwing to be the medicine cat. Mothwing, too, returned to her clan. The two were forgiven, as they were the only medicine cats in both clans, and out of it being an uncomfortable topic, most cats have forgotten that it even happened.

Disregard the back story the Erins gave Sol. I'm taking him and making him my own

Sandstorm and Dustpelt are almost ready to retire. They will retire with Greystripe once his kits are born. Let me know if you think any warriors should retire, and when. I want to make sure some of the new characters get the attention the deserve.


	2. Allegiances

**ThunderClan**

**Leader** : **Firestar** \- Flame-coloured tom with green eyes  
**Deputy** : **Brackenfur** \- Red tabby tom with amber eyes  
**Medicine Cat** : **Leafpool** : Brown tabby she-cat with white muzzle, belly and paws

**Warriors  
****Brambleflower** \- Large, black tabby tom with scars on his face  
          Apprentice: Berrypaw **  
Dustpelt** \- Dark tabby tom   
          Apprentice - Hazelpaw  
**Sandstorm** \- Cream tabby she-cat with pale green eyes  
          Apprentice - Honeypaw  
**Cloudtail** \- Fluffy, heavy white tom  
          Apprentice - Cinderpaw  
**Thornclaw** \- Red tabby tom with amber eyes  
**Brightheart** \- White she-cat with ginger tabby patches  
**Rainwhisker -** Grey and white tom with amber eyes  
**Ashfur** \- Black and silver spotted tom   
**Sorreltail** \- Calico she-cat with amber eyes  
**Spiderleg** \- Leggy brown and black tom with a darker face, legs and tail   
          Apprentice - Mousepaw  
**Brook -** Brown tabby she-cat with pale eyes  
**Stormfur** \- Dark grey tom with amber eyes  
**Whitewing** \- White she-cat with green eyes  
**Birchfall -** Grey spotted tabby tom

**Apprentices**  
**Berrypaw** \- Cream-coloured tom with amber eyes  
**Hazelpaw** \- Grey and white she-cat with green eyes  
**Mousepaw** \- Grey and white tom with amber eyes  
**Cinderpaw** \- Grey tabby she-cat with barely noticeable cream patches and a white underbelly  
**Honeypaw** \- Cream tabby she-cat with white paws  
**Poppypaw** \- Tortoiseshell she-cat

**Queens**  
**Ferncloud** \- Silver and black spotted tabby with green eyes. Mother of Icekit - a silver and black spotted she-kit, and Foxkit - a brown tabby tom  
**Daisy** \- Fluffy, cream-coloured queen with blue eyes  
**Squirrelflight** \- Red she-cat with green eyes. Mother of Jaykit - a pale blue tabby with swirling stripes and blue eyes, Hollykit - a slender black she-cat with bright green eyes, and Lionkit - a red tabby tom with amber eyes

**Elders**  
**Longtail** \- Silver and brown tabby tom, recently retired due to age  
**Mousefur** \- Small brown tabby she-cat

 

**ShadowClan**

**Leader** : **Blackstar** \- Hefty white-brown tom with black legs and face  
**Deputy** : **Russetfur** \- Dark ginger she-cat  
**Medicine Cat** : **Littlecloud** : Small brown tabby tom

**Warriors** **  
Oakfur** \- Brown tabby tom  
**Rowanclaw** \- Red tabby tom with green eyes  
          Apprentice - Ivypaw  
**Smokefoot** \- Beefy black tom with round head  
          Apprentice - Owlpaw  
**Snowbird** \- White and black she-cat  
**Apprentices**  
**Ivypaw** \- Tall tortoiseshell she-cat  
**Owlpaw** \- Black tabby tom

**Queens**  
**Tawnypelt** \- Large pale tabby tortoiseshell she-cat with green eyes

**Elders**  
**Cedarheart** \- Grey tom  
**Tallpoppy** \- Brown tabby she-cat

 

**WindClan**

**Leader** : **Onestar** \- Skinny brown spotted tabby tom  
**Deputy** : **Ashfoot** \- Grey she-cat  
**Medicine Cat** : **Crowfeather** : Ornery black tom  
          Apprentice: Kestrelpaw

**Warriors** **  
Tornear** \- Brown tabby tom  
          Apprentice - Harepaw  
**Owlwhisker** \- Brown tabby tom  
          Apprentice - Heatherpaw  
**Whitetail** \- White she-cat  
**Nightcloud** \- Black she-cat  
**Weaselfur -** Red striped tom with a white belly

  
**Apprentices**  
**Kestrelpaw** \- Brown spotted tabby tom  
**Harepaw** \- Brown spotted tabby tom with a white belly  
**Heatherpaw -** Lilac tabby she-cat with green eyes

**Elders**  
**Webfoot** \- Grey tabby tom

 

**RiverClan**

**Leader** : **Leopardstar** \- Bengal-spotted she-cat  
**Deputy** : **Mistyfoot** \- Grey she-cat with blue eyes  
          Apprentice - Dapplepaw  
**Medicine Cat** : **Mothwing** : Beautiful golden and white she-cat with blue eyes  
          Apprentice - Willowpaw

**Warriors** **  
Blackclaw** \- Smokey black tom  
**Voletooth** \- Brown tabby tom  
          Apprentice - Minnowpaw  
**Reedwhisker** \- Smokey black tom with grey eyes  
          Apprentice - Pouncepaw  
**Mosspelt** \- Calico she-cat with blue eyes  
          Apprentice - Pebblepaw  
**Beechfur -** Brown tabby tom  
**Rippletail -** Grey tabby tom

  
**Apprentices  
Willowpaw - **Grey tabby she-cat with amber eyes  
**Minnowpaw** \- Grey and white she-cat  
**Pouncepaw** \- Red tabby and white tom  
**Pebblepaw -** Grey spotted tabby tom

**Queens**  
**Dawnflower** \- Grey she-cat

**Elders**  
**Heavystep** \- Grey tabby tom  
**Swallowtail** \- Black and white she-cat  
**Stonestream -** Grey tom

 

**Cats outside of Clans  
Greystripe - ** Fluffy grey tom  
**Millie -** Small, hefty silver tabby she-cat with a round head


	3. Prologue

Night had settled over the forest, the sky a sea of inky black dotted with bright, clear stars. A pool, as flat as a mirror and frozen through, reflected the sky where claw-shaped moon was glowing starkly. The light reflected off the snow that sat glistening along the ground, lighting up the hollow surrounding the pool.

            Upon the flat rocks, the snow dusted carefully away, two she-cats sat crouched together. Their breaths joined as one in a puff of white, disappearing into the cold air. The warmth shared between them could not stave off the frosty chill that seeped up from the stones beneath them.

            "Are they beautiful?" one she-cat asked with a quiet meow. Her pale blue eyes shone with undisguised wonder, but grief was also muddied there,

            "The most beautiful," the other replied. Her voice was trembling.

            "What did you name them? Have they opened their eyes yet?"

            "No... They're still so young." The she-cat curled her brown-striped tail around her, leaning into the thick, warm pelt of the golden she-cat next to her.

            "I named the she-kit Hollykit. There was a holly bush near my birthing-den," amber eyes grew round and fond at the memory. "Her fur is as black as those branches. The red tom, I named Lionkit. His fur is as fluffy as yours, like the mane of a lion."

            The other she-cat let out a chuckle. "And the third kit?"

            "Oh, he's so tiny and sweet!" The dark tabby she-cat meowed lovingly, "His fur is grey, almost blue. I named him Jaykit for it." She shook her head. "I'm worried for him. He's just so small; he could get sick so easily."

            "He is your son. He is strong and he'll be okay."

            "He's your son, too." The black-striped she-cat turned to face the other, her face famed by a white that glowed softly in the pale light of the moon. "I wish you could meet them."

            "I will, in time," the golden she-cat sighed and turned her gaze to the frozen pool of water. Cold stars blinked back at her. She sought comfort in their rays, but found none. "Who is nursing them?"

            "Ferncloud. She is a seasoned queen, and her kits will not be born for another half-moon or so. She treats them all as her own."

            A moment of silence beat between them, their grief and regret battling with their hard-won acceptance of the situation.

            "I enjoyed being their mother, for a time," the dark tabby's voice was strained and sad.

            "You still are," the golden she-cat reminded her. "No matter who they call their parents, they are still our kittens. They were born of our love and will carry love with them."

            "These kits are the luckiest kits alive; they have so many cats looking out for them," the black tabby she-cat laughed weakly.

            "They will be amazing."

            "They already are."

***

            The pine-tree forest sat beneath an overcast sky, the sounds of crows crying out echoed ominously throughout the frost-kissed land. Muddied tree roots clambered through a pathway in the forest, claw-like tendrils shaping a small hollow beneath a pine tree. The branches scraped low, protecting a nest of pine needles and bracken. A cruel wind whipped just outside of the meager shelter, making branches scrape together menacingly.

            One cat, a flame coloured tom worn by age and many battles, curled his tail uneasily over his paws after entering the den. His green eyes were bright even in the dim lighting, giving away his wariness. "You asked for me?"

            From the shadowy depths, a pair of eyes blinked out at him, clear and blue as the sky on a green-leaf day. A grey tom, large and powerful, with scarred ears reflecting his age and experience in battle, sat crouched with his paws tucked under him.

            "Firestar," the tom inclined his head and let out a soft purr as the ginger tom leaned in to rub against his cheek in a display of affection and respect. "I must give thanks again for all you've done for my clan. No cat could have done better."

            "There's no need to thank me," Firestar replied, sitting back down. "It was my duty to right the wrongs of the past."

            The grey cat considered this for a moment, then closed his eyes. His voice was hoarse with age when he replied, rasping gently. "Still, thank you. Firestar, I asked you here today to warn you. No cat doubts your loyalty to ThunderClan, but I must ask - how far does it run?"

            Firestar's eyes glittered uncertainly, and he shuffled on the bed of needles, unsure of how to respond. The grey tom studied him for a moment before letting out a dusky sigh.

            "There are difficult times ahead, and your loyalty will be questioned," he meowed, standing up stiffly. "You will have to make sacrifices in order to keep peace."

            The old tom raised his head, eyes eerie and blank, pupils blown wide and reflecting non-existent stars. Firestar swallowed, panic at the unnatural sight before him making his tail and neck fur bristle.

            When the old tom spoke again, his voice echoed the voices of many cats, old and young, male and female. The sound was deafening, yet quiet all at the same time.

            " _There will be three, kin of your kin, who hold the power of the stars in their paws."_

"I... I don't understand!" Firestar stood, backing away from his old friend with undisguised fear in his voice. "Why are you telling me this?"

            The old warrior sat down, his eyes returning to normal. He looked up and regarded Firestar blankly, as if waiting to see what he said.

            "I don't know what to do! Please, Skywatcher, you _have_ to tell me more!"

            Skywatcher let out a sigh, closing his eyes and lowering his head. His breath whistled out of his body like wind through naked trees, old and withered and empty.

            "Farewell, my dear friend. In the moons to come, I only ask that you remember me."

***

            Firestar jerked awake, talons of fear gripping his heart tightly. He blinked with relief as he saw the familiar walls of his den, and the creamy pelt of his beautiful mate Sandstorm sleeping soundly beside him. Daylight streamed through the entrance of his den, nearing the end of their mid-day nap. The scent of his mate calmed him, and he nuzzled her neck affectionately, letting out a purr when she mumbled softly in her sleep.

            He flicked his ears and closed his eyes tightly, trying in vain to dislodge the dream. However, he knew with a heavy heart, that it was no ordinary dream. The prophecy, known only to him and his mate, was given to him by Skywatcher many seasons before when their daughters had not yet been born. The prophecy had followed him all the way to the lake, where the clans now made their new home and were currently forging new traditions and routines. In time, no cat alive will remember the forest of old; the thought saddened the old leader, but he knew it was ultimately inevitable.

            Firestar opened his eyes and gazed out at the camp below. His deputy, Brackenfur, carried a large vole towards the edge of camp, intending to share it with his mate Sorreltail. Firestar's daughter Squirrelflight meowed her greeting to them as she padded past, tail in the air as her three children ran up to greet her, almost of the age to be apprenticed. Firestar gazed at his grandchildren fondly, but unease grew in his heart.

            _I pray that I am wrong,_ his own words, spoken to Sandstorm the night they saw their grandchildren for the first time, echoed in his mind. _The three have come..._


	4. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a warning: The first two chapters will be almost exactly like the canon books. I did not change much. Things start to change in chapter three!

Chapter 1

            _It was cold. The warmth of his mother was in front of him, yet always two steps ahead. Jaykit cried for her, but she would not come. He could hear his own wails, and felt the despair in his heart. Finally, he felt teeth wrap gently around his neck, and he went limp in the jaws of his mother. He shivered violently. It was so cold...._

"You're a slow slug!" A high-pitched mew broke Jaykit from his dreams, waking him with a start. Jaykit was curled around two smaller kits, just a moon younger than him and already so big. He shook them off and stood, stretching his shoulder and seeking out the offending source of the alarm that awoke him.

            His sister and brother were near the entrance of the den, scrabbling in play. Ferncloud, dozing beside him, curled around him and her two kits, purred contently in the warm evening air. He could smell his mother's nest behind him, stale and cold. She hadn't slept in the nursery in days, choosing to continue her warrior duties while Ferncloud and Daisy took care of her litter. Daisy's nest smelled much more recent, and he knew she'd probably only just left the den.

            His nightmare melted to the back of his mind; there was no snow now, and the air was sweet and warm in the early new-leaf. He was safe.

            "Oof!" He gasped as his sister, Hollykit, landed heavily on top of him, pinning him into the moss. "Watch out, you big lug!"

            "Well get your butt up and help me!" She laughed loudly in his ear and rolled off him, twisting and trying for something just out of her reach.

            _Mouse!_ Jaykit could smell it. It was still warm and fresh; his littermates must have been playing with the fresh-kill brought back from the dusk patrol. He sprang to his paws and gave a quick stretch, his back arching smoothly beneath his pelt.

            "Catch, Jaykit! Don't let Lionkit nab it!" Hollykit meowed. The mouse whistled past his ear, and Jaykit, distracted, moved too late to catch it.

            "It's mine now!" Lionkit yowled, butting his way past his smaller brother. He pounced on the fresh-kill, his paws thudding softly on the mossy nursery floor.

            "Quiet, you three!" Ferncloud whispered in annoyance, curling her tail around the two kits asleep at her belly. "You're going to wake them, and I've just gotten them to settle down!"

            "Sorry, Ferncloud!" Lionkit's meow was muffled by the mouse in his jaws.

            "You are all getting to rough for the nursery," Jaykit could feel affection rolling off Ferncloud, covering her irritation. She loved the three as if they were her own, and when they were very small she suckled them at her belly, even when her own two kits were born. Their mother, Squirrelflight, could not produce milk for them, but Ferncloud was more than happy to support Jaykit and his siblings. Jaykit felt a happy swell in his heart at the thought.

            "We'll be apprenticed soon! We're nearly six moons old!" Hollykit reminded Ferncloud, her tail sticking up in excitement. "Then we'll be sleeping in the apprentices den!"

            Jaykit felt the same surge of excitement run though his limbs at the thought of becoming a warrior apprentice. However, without even needing to see her face, He knew she was looking at him with pity in her eyes. He picked up on a prickle of unease that ran through Ferncloud's pelt, a flicker of doubt that settled its way into Jaykit's heart as well. He swallowed it back down, flicking his ears angrily. His pelt bristled in frustration - he was just as ready to become an apprentice as Hollykit and Lionkit!

            Ferncloud answered Hollykit, unaware that Jaykit had picked u on her doubt. "Well, you don't have mentors yet! So, until then you must play outside and let us sleep!

            "Yes, Ferncloud!" Lionkit mumbled, the mouse still lodged in his teeth. The den rustled as he forced his way out and into the clearing.

            "Come on, Jaykit!" Hollykit meowed, turning and scrambling out of the den. "We can't let him steal it for himself!" The branches of the bramble bush rustled as she slid through the nursery entrance.

            Jaykit scrabbled out of the nursery behind his sister, the barbs of the entrance tunnel clawed satisfyingly at his fur. They were just sharp enough to tug at his pelt but not quite so sharp that they hurt.

            Outside, the air smelled thick, a slow, hot breeze foretelling the coming of green-leaf. Firestar was sharing tongues with Sandstorm at the base of the Highledge, listening to Dustpelt.

            "The warriors den could use an extension," he was saying. "Daisy and Sorreltail's kits won't be apprentices forever!"

            _Nor will we!_ Jaykit thought, digging his claws into the soft earth.

            Brightheart and Cloudtail were grooming each other in a patch of sunlight on the other side of the clearing. Jaykit could hear the steady lapping of their tongues, like rain dripping onto the leafy canopy above them. Like all of ThunderClan, their pelts were still leaf-bare thick. However their muscles were lean and taught beneath them, earned through moons of scarce hunting.

            Hunger was not the only hardship that leaf-bare had brought. Molepaw, one of Sorreltail's kits, had died of a fever that came on suddenly.

            Brightheart paused from her washing as Jaykit passed her. "Good morning, Jaykit," she meowed.

            "Morning," he answered, flicking his tail in greeting. Hollykit ran into him, the mouse in her jaws, squealing as Jaykit pounced on her and nipped at her ears. Lionkit thundered over to them, bowling them over in his attempt to grab the mouse from Hollykit.

            "You should have more respect for your prey!" Their mother's voice sounded from the entrance of the camp, just returning from a border patrol. Jaykit could detect the scents of the forest that clung to her fur, distinctly recognising the sharp smell of pine.

 _She must have been to the ShadowClan border,_ he thought.

            "Kits will be kits," Daisy meowed, purring affectionately from her spot outside of the nursery. Jaykit's ears twitched at her familiar scent. She'd not grown up in ThunderClan, nor did she train as a warrior, but Daisy was as much a part of his clan as he was, and he was the grandchild of the leader. Her children, Mousepaw, Hazelpaw and Berrypaw, were all on their way to becoming incredible warriors.

            "They aren't really kits anymore," Squirrelflight huffed. "They're taller than me."

            "Most of the clan is taller than you, Squirrelflight!" Daisy purred. "And besides, they won't be young forever. They should enjoy themselves while they can!"

            Jaykit felt a wave of affection roll through him for the long-furred she-cat. While Squirrelflight was their mother, it had been Daisy who had washed them and warmed them alongside Ferncloud when clan duties kept their mother from the nursery. Though she still had a nest inside the nursery, she rarely slept there unless she was missing her kits. She preferred to sleep with her mate - the three's father - in the warriors den.

            A horrid stench distracted Jaykit; the distinct smell of mouse bile wafted over from the elder's den. One of the apprentices, or perhaps his Aunt Leafpool, must have been removing a tick from one of the elders. A much more pleasant odour heralded the return of Mousepaw and Hazelpaw, bringing in heaps of fresh-kill from the forest and carrying it to the fresh-kill pile. They hurried excitedly to the fresh-kill pile, steps swift in their rush. Mousepaw carried a large, fat thrush while his sister Hazelpaw carried two mice.

            After they had deposited the prey in the fresh-kill pile, Dustpelt padded up to greet them. "Looks like you did well, Hazelpaw!" He purred, praising his apprentice. "You both did." Mousepaw and Hazelpaw purred bashfully at the praise, and Jaykit noticed how close their purrs sounded to Daisy's; as if they were being smothered by swaths of thick pelts.

            A sudden rush of wind and fur knocked Jaykit off his paws and broke his concentration.

            "Are you playing with us or not?" Hollykit demanded.

            Jaykit leapt to his paws and shook out his unruly fur. "Of course I am!"

            "Well, Lionkit's got the mouse and he's not giving it up!" Hollykit complained.

            "Let's get him then!" Jaykit hared across the clearing towards the mass of thick fur that was his brother. He bundled into Lionkit and pinned him down into the soft camp floor, holding him down as he struggled. Hollykit reached in and pried the mouse from his claws, laughing triumphantly.

            "Unfair!" Lionkit meowed.

            "We don't have to be fair!" Hollykit meowed, "we're not in StarClan yet!"

            "And you never _will_ be if you don't start treating your fresh-kill with respect!" Stormfur had paused to observe the game on his way to the warriors den. His voice had the light, high accent of his birth-clan, and while his words were stern, Jaykit could feel the warmth inside him. "Leaf-bare just ended. We should be thankful for every morsel."

            Lionkit stood while Jaykit was distracted, successfully freeing himself. "We were just practising our hunting skills!"

            "We have to practise," Jaykit added, shaking his fur. "We'll be apprentices soon!"

            Stormfur was quiet for a moment, then he stretched forwards and gave Jaykit a quick lick between the ears. "Of course you will," he meowed, his voice sad. "I was forgetting." Jaykit felt frustration burn in his belly, stinging his eyes. Why did everyone have to treat him like a newborn kit when he was already the size of a warrior? He was almost six moons old! He backed away from Stormfur. If Stormfur noticed his hurt, he said nothing.

            Hollykit's belly rumbled. "How about we eat this mouse instead of playing with it?" She asked.

            "You two share it," Lionkit meowed. "I'll get something from the fresh-kill pile."

            Jayit turned his nose to the fresh-kill pile; a faint scent coming from it disturbed him. He took in a deep breath and opened his mouth to draw in the scents. Most prominent were the tempting scents of the mice and thrush that Mousepaw and Hazelpaw had brought back just moments ago, their blood still warm. However, beneath that was a sour stench that made his tongue curl and his stomach do flip-flops. He padded past his brother, his tail stiff and claws out in disgust.

            "What's up?" Lionkit asked, tilting his head.

            "Look," Jaykit meowed, digging into the pile and dragging out an old wren with his claws. He rolled it over with a paw, disgusted to hear the tell-tale signs of squirming maggots eating out the belly of the bird.

            "Ew!" Hollykit squealed, her pelt puffing up.

            Leafpool emerged from the medicine cat's den with a wad of herbs in her jaws. She paused beside them, setting down the herbs and peering at the rotting wren.

            "Well spotted!" she praised them, a spark of pride leaping from her. "That would have caused someone to be very ill if they'd eaten it."

            "Jaykit found it," Hollykit told her.

            "Well, he's saved me a patient," Leafpool purred, nuzzling the top of Jaykit's head. He purred, tail curling up behind him. "I'm busy enough as it is. Birchfall and Brackenfur have a cough."

            "Do you need help gathering herbs?" Jaykit offered. He had never been in the forest and wanted desperately to leave the camp and explore beyond. He wanted to scent the border markers himself; until then he'd only caught traces of the scents of WindClan and ShadowClan from the pelts of warriors who'd returned from border patrol. He wanted to taste the breeze fresh off the lake, untainted by the scents of the forest and its residents. He wanted to stretch his legs and feel the grass against his belly, to scratch his claws down unmarked trees.

            "You could carry so many more herbs with us helping," Lionkit supplied.

            "You know you're not meant to leave the camp until you've been made apprentices," Leafpool reminded them sweetly.

            "Aw, but Auntie Leafpool, you'll need our help if there are sick cats!" Jaykit pleaded.

            "I'm sorry Jaykit," Leafpool flicked her tail gently over his ears. "You know how it is. It won't be long until Firestar gives you your apprentice names, but until then you have to wait just like every other kit."

            Jaykit knew the meaning behind her words; they were the grandchildren of Firestar. They needed to know that they didn't receive special treatment because of that. Jaykit's whiskers drooped in a pout; it wasn't fair! It seemed that every cat was set out to make sure they _never_ got special treatment!

            "Bye now, my sweets," Leafpool purred, picking up her bundle of sharp-scented herbs.

            "Nice try," Lionkit meowed, sounding slightly disappointed. "But it looks like we're stuck in camp a little while longer."

            "Auntie Leafpool always thinks she can win us over with honey and sheep's wool. Why can't she just give us what we _really_ want, a chance to explore outside the camp!" Jaykit meowed grumpily.

            "Because it would break the warrior code!" Hollykit meowed. Her tail swished over the ground. Jaykit knew she was itching to leave the camp just as much as he and Lionkit were.

            The three of them ate, sharing the mouse and the vole between them. As Jaykit cleaned his paws after, purring as Hollykit cleaned his ears with her tongue, he noticed Brook emerging from the warriors den to join Cloudtail and Brightheart in the sun. Something about her, a wariness that was so ingrained into her that Jaykit could barely recognize it, made it seem as if something was wrong. She was a mountain cat, born far away in a land of rock, wind and snow. Whatever she did, however long she spent with ThunderClan, Jaykit was sure that she never truly felt at home in the forest.

            A rustle in the thorn barrier that protected the entrance to the camp signalled Berrypaw's return. The arrogant apprentice charged over to the fresh-kill pile and threw down his catch - a plump pigeon.

            "Where is Brambleflower?" He meowed, facing the kits. Brambleflower was Berrypaw's mentor, and Jaykit couldn't help but feel a small pang of jealously when he thought of the all the time Berrypaw and Brambleflower spent together when his own paws ached to hunt alongside his father.

            "He's with Mama," Jaykit meowed. His ears were pricked; he couldn't hear his parent's voices, but the breeze blowing down from the medicine den carried their scents. They must be checking for loose stones. "Up on the cliff." He lifted his nose in their direction.

            "You're sharp today, Jaykit!" Berrypaw meowed brightly. "I wanted to show him my catch! We're supposed to do battle training once the sun sets."

            Jealousy gnawed harder at Jaykit's belly. _Why can't we be apprentices_ now _??_

"You must be really good at hunting by now," Lionkit meowed, his tone telling Jaykit that he was thinking the same thing.

            "It's just practise. Here, this is how you start!"

            Lionkit's belly fur swished across the ground as he tried to copy Berrypaw.

            "Lionkit, tail down! It's sticking up like a bluebell!" Berrypaw ordered, his voice carrying amusement.

            Lionkit's tail slapped audibly onto the ground.

            "Alright. Now, pull yourself forwards, as smooth as a snake," Berrypaw instructed.

            "You look like you've been squashed by a monster!" Hollykit crowed. Lionkit gave a playful hiss and leapt onto her, rolling onto the ground. She fought back, purring with amusement while Lionkit battered at her belly with soft hind paws. The two of them were so busy with their play-fighting that they didn't notice the sudden commotion outside the camp.

            But Jaykit did.

            Cats' paws were pounding towards the camp entrance. Jaykit recognised the scents of Thornclaw and Spiderleg, returning from patrol. But something was wrong. The warrior's paws drummed the forest floor in a panicked rush, their scents bitter with fear.

            Jaykit's fur stood on end as Spiderleg and Thornclaw burst through the entrance. Firestar and Sandstorm bolted to their paws.

            "What is it?" Firestar asked.

            Spiderleg panted, then announced, "There's a dead fox in our territory!"


	5. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, this chapter is almost entirely the canon chapter. Stay tuned, chapter three is different!

Chapter 2

            "Where?" Firestar's meow was tense.

            "By the Sky Oak," Thornclaw meowed, panting lightly. "It was killed by a trap."

                        A clatter of stones came raining down from above as Brambleflower and Squirrelflight rushed down to meet them. Brackenfur, their deputy, trotted over from where he was dozing, still recovering from a cough.

            "What's going on?" Brambleflower asked, huffing slightly.

            "Thornclaw and Spiderleg have found a dead fox," Firestar explained. "Killed by a trap."

            "Male or female?" Brackenfur asked, his voice hoarse.

            "Female. She smelled a bit of milk, but it wasn't fresh." Spiderleg meowed.

            "That's a bad sign. Means that her cubs are mostly grown," Squirrelflight growled.

            "Where was this trap?" Brambleflower asked. Jaykit could feel rolling anxiety coming from his father when the trap was brought up. Surely his father knew enough about the fox traps to not be too scared by them?

            "Near the lake, not too far from the Sky Oak," Thornclaw replied, breaking into Jaykit's thoughts.

            "The set shouldn't be too far away, then," Brackenfur gave a nod. "We need to kill the cubs while we can."

            "They can't get into the camp, can they?" Daisy asked worriedly.

            "I doubt even a full-grown fox would attempt to enter a camp filled with warriors," Firestar soothed. "Even so, we will station guards at the entrance. Ashfur, Rainwhisker, stay within the boundaries of the camp and keep watch," the two grey toms stood, their belly fur swishing the bracken as they hurried into the tunnel to scour the outer walls. Firestar continued, "Sandstorm and I will check out the old Thunderpath up to the empty twoleg nest. Brackenfur, Brambleflower, you can sort out the other patrols." Firestar and Sandstorm followed Rainwhisker and Ashfur, the branches barely rustling as they rushed past the prickly thorn barrier that protected the entrance to the camp.

            "Stormfur, Brook!" Brambleflower yowled, Brackenfur's voice too weak to shout too loudly. "Patrol the outside of the camp with Ashfur and Rainwhisker. Make sure nothing gets into the camp."

            Brightheart and Cloudtail paced in front of the two toms. "What do you want us to do?"

            "Head towards the ShadowClan border," Brackenfur meowed. "The earth is sandy there, ideal for a den. Take Squirrelflight with you. Also Cinderpaw, but keep her close to you."

            Cloudtail called his apprentice's name, but she was already skittering up to him, her paws slapping against the soft earth.

            Squirrelflight made her way towards the entrance. Jaykit could feel her anticipation as she passed.

            Brackenfur turned to Thornclaw and Spiderleg, who had finally caught their breaths. "Go back to where you found the fox. See if you can trace her scent back to the den."

            Poppypaw and Mousepaw were waiting patiently, trembling with excitement and hardly able to stand still.

            "Can we go with them?" Poppypaw asked.

            "Yes, but stay close and do as they tell you. Foxes won't take on a whole patrol, but if they're hungry enough they _will_ try their luck with a young cat. Be careful." Brackenfur eyed his daughter Poppypaw sternly.

            "We will!" She promised, rushing from the camp behind her mentor, Mousepaw by her side.

            Jaykit felt their excitement crackle like static in the air, making his paws itch to join them. Nearly all the apprentices were out hunting down fox cubs. It wasn't fair! He might be small, but he could still take on a cub.

            "We're not going to be left behind!" Lionkit announced, echoing Jaykit's thoughts. "Papa!"

            "Yeah?" Brambleflower's voice was impatient.

            "Can't we do something to help?" Lionkit begged. "We're nearly apprentices!"

            " _Nearly_ isn't quite enough," Brambleflower replied sternly. He must have picked up on the bitter disappointment radiating from Lionkit, because his tone was soft and kind as he added, "You and your siblings can help guard the camp. Brackenfur, Dustpelt, Hazelpaw and I are going to search the lakeshore. We need brave cats to make sure no fox cubs break into the camp. If you see, hear or smell anything strange or even remotely foxy, send Leafpool to fetch us at once."

            "Okay," Lionkit meowed eagerly.

            As he hurried back to his brother and sister, Brackenfur led the patrol from the camp. The kits were alone in the clearing.

            "We've got to guard the camp," Lionkit meowed to his littermates. "In case the fox cubs try to get in."

            "You don't really think the foxes would even come this far, do you?" Jaykit muttered grumpily. "There must be a ThunderClan cat behind every bush and tree out there. Papa's just trying to keep us busy."

            Lionkit sat down with a thump. "I thought he really wanted us to help."

            "You never know," Hollykit meowed. "The fox cubs might come this far, and if they do I bet we could scent them first - especially with Jaykit helping!"

            A surge of embarrassed anger surged through Jaykit's paws. "You're just as bad as Papa," he snapped. "Stop trying to pretend like we're important to the clan."

            "We will be," Hollykit meowed. "We'll be important some day."

            Suddenly, with a gasp Lionkit stood and excitedly turned in a circle. His fluffed-up tail smacked Jaykit on the cheek in Lionkit's distraction. "We'll be important today!" he declared. "We're going to find and kill those fox cubs ourselves!"

            Hollykit gasped. "But if we leave the camp without permission we'll be breaking the Warrior Code!"

            "We'll be doing it for the good of the clan," Lionkit argued. "How can that be against the Warrior Code?"

            Jaykit thought of something else. "We're not warriors, or even apprentices! Why should we have to follow the Warrior Code?"

            A purr rose in Hollykit's throat. "If we did chase off those cubs, Firestar might even make us apprentices early!"

            "Exactly!" Lionkit meowed. "This is our chance to prove ourselves!" He turned and padded to a shaded part of the thorn barrier that cut off the camp from the rest of the forest. Jaykit knew exactly where he was headed. There was a small tunnel there that led to the place where cats made their dirt. No one would question if they left the camp that way. He doubted anyone would even notice them slipping away. The clearing was deserted; all the apprentices and warriors were out patrolling, guarding and searching for the fox cubs. Longtail and Mousefur were likely asleep in their den, Daisy and Ferncloud watching over Icekit and Foxkit in the nursery, and Leafpool was sorting herbs in her den. He could hear them inside, soft fur brushing over moss, gentle rustling.

            His heart raced as Jaykit followed his siblings through the narrow tunnel.

            "No one saw us," Hollykit whispered from beside him as they emerged into the forest.

            He smelled the dirt place and veered away from it, following Lionkit up the sloping bank away from the camp. They ducked down, pausing as Ashfur's pawsteps up on the cliff surprised them.

            "Can he see us?" Jaykit whispered.

            "No, the thorns are in the way. Let's move," Hollykit replied, slinking forwards again.

            "We should go unnoticed if we stay off the main paths," Lionkit meowed.

            "But we don't know where the main paths _are_ ," Jaykit reminded her. The forest floor felt strange and exhilarating beneath his paws, the littered leaves and twigs creating a blanket that was in stark contrast to the smooth, clear ground of the stone hollow.

            "We can guess where they are by where the scents are the strongest," Hollykit meowed. "There's hardly any scent coming from up ahead. The slope is steep and there doesn't seem to be any tracks through the bracken."

            "Let's go that way, then," Lionkit meowed.

            "What do you think, Jaykit?" Hollykit asked.

            "Thornclaw said they found the fox lakeside of the camp, which is over there," he flicked his tail in the direction of the lake.

            "How do you know where the lake is?" Hollykit sounded puzzled.

            "I can smell the wind from the water," Jaykit explained. "It tastes fresher than the wind from the hills or the forest."

            The three kits ran back down the slope and began to climb a thickly wooded rise. The ground here felt damp and cold under-paw, and Jaykit guessed it had less sunshine than the other slope.

            They carried on up the slope until they reached the crest where the trees thinned out. Jaykit felt the warmth of dappled sunlight flickering through the branches.

            A scent made him stop in alarm. "Stop!" he warned. He stretched to sniff a frond of bracken, trying to distinguish the many ThunderClan warrior scents. "The warriors come this way a lot."

            "I can't see anyone," Hollykit meowed.

            "We'd better be careful, though," Jaykit urged. "What if we bump into a patrol?"

            "If only it were green-leaf," Lionkit mused. "Then there would be tons of undergrowth to hide in."

            "What about over there?" Hollykit meowed. "The trees are thicker, and there are brambles."

            "Perfect!" Lionkit meowed enthusiastically, darting forwards away from the strong smelling bracken and into the trees beyond, his siblings close behind. The air cleared, becoming less saturated with ThunderClan scents. The muscles in Jaykit's shoulder had just begun to relax when they heard a familiar accented voice shout.

            "Brook?" Stormfur was calling for his mate, seemingly unaware of the three.

            "Get down," Jaykit hissed. Instantly, all three kits crouched low, pressing their bellies to the cold earth. Jaykit felt his heart hammer in his chest, thudding against the leaf mulch.

            The ground vibrated with approaching pawsteps.

            "They're coming this way," Jaykit warned. How would they explain being this far from camp?

            "Let's hide beneath that chokecherry bush," Hollykit suggested.

            As they rushed towards the bush, Hollykit nudging Jaykit from behind, branches slapped his cheek and the soft sprouts of new leaves tickled his nose. Hollykit shoved in beside him, squashing him under the low branches.

            "They shouldn't see us here," she whispered.

            Stormfur's call sounded again. "Let's head to the ShadowClan border." The warriors voice sounded frighteningly close.

            Brook answered him, her low, odd mew only tail-lengths away. "Do you think it might have been using the old fox den?"

            "Probably not; it still reeks of badger. It's worth checking, though," the warriors turned and bounded straight towards the chokecherry bush. The branches quivered as Stormfur's pelt brushed past. Jaykit flattened himself to the ground, claws digging into the earth in his anxiety. He only raised his head when he was sure the pawsteps were fading away.

            "Let's get out of here," Jaykit whispered.

            "Which way?" Lionkit asked him.

            Jaykit sniffed the air, mouth open to let the scents touch his tongue. "Over there," he meowed after a moment, pointing his nose towards the direction of the lake.

            The kits set off again, keeping as low to the ground as they could. Lionkit led them along a winding route through swathes of bracken and tangled undergrowth. He urged them through a thicket of bracken, Jaykit using his whiskers to navigate safely through.

            They scrabbled over and under the arching roots of a great sycamore, tunneling a path through the damp and cold leaf litter underneath.

            Jaykit stopped. He could just detect the fresh scent of Spiderleg. "Wait," he warned. "Thornclaw's patrol just passed this way."

            "We must be close," Hollykit mewed.

            "I think that's the Sky Oak," Lionkit meowed excitedly. "It's the tallest tree I've seen by a long way!"

            "Where's the patrol?" Jaykit asked.

            "Listen," Hollykit whispered.

            Jaykit could hear the patrol thrashing around in the bracken several fox-lengths away. Then his fur bristled; he tasted the air and recoiled at the stench that bathed his tongue. It was a smell he'd never met before, but it sent a shiver down his spine.

            "Do you smell that?" Jaykit asked his littermates.

            "Ugh!" Lionkit spat.

            "It must be the dead fox," Hollykit guessed. "We're near the trap."

            "Can you see it?" Jaykit asked.

            Hollykit wriggled away from him, leaping onto the roots of the sycamore to get a better view. "I can see it!" she whispered from just above his head. "The dead fox is lying under the oak. The patrol is searching the bracken behind it."

            "They're searching the wrong area," Jaykit meowed. He'd suddenly realized that, despite the scent of the dead fox and the patrol, he could smell a subtler and far sweeter smell - the scent of milk. It was stale, but there was no mistaking it. It was right there, beneath the sycamore. "The fox came past this tree," he told the others. "I can smell her milk-scent."

            "You've found the trail!" Hollykit whispered excitedly.

            Lionkit scrabbled out from under a root. "Let's follow it!"

            Jaykit turned away from where Thornclaw and his patrol were plunging through the frost-blackened undergrowth and headed out past the sycamore. He lifted his nose and opened his mouth, padding confidently forwards along the fox's trail.

            "Watch out!" Lionkit warned. "There are brambles ahead."

            Jaykit, having been intent only on the trail, had not noticed the spiky bush.

            "I'll find a way through," Hollykit offered, starting forwards. She pushed gently past her brothers and began to wiggle her way through the branches.

            "But the trail goes around," Jaykit objected.

            "We can't afford to stay in the open. We can pick up the scent trail on the other side," Lionkit meowed, "once there are brambles between us and Thornclaw's patrol, at least."

            Reluctantly Jaykit followed his siblings and pushed his way through the narrow tunnel Hollykit had made. He was relieved when he picked up the fox's scent trail quickly on the other side.

            The trees were more widely spaced here. Jaykit could feel the wind in his fur and the sunlight dappling the forest floor, mottling his pelt with its watery warmth. The fox's scent grew stronger, and as they neared a clump of bracken that must have been shielding the den, Jaykit could scent something new. The cubs?

            "Wait here!" Hollykit meowed.

            "Why?" Lionkit objected.

            Just wait while I take a look behind the bracken!"

            "I'm coming too," Lionkit insisted.

            "We don't want the cubs to know we're here," Hollykit explained. "If all three of us go barrelling in we'll lose the element of surprise!"

            "My pelt will blend in better than yours," Lionkit pointed out.

            "What about me?" Jaykit meowed.

            "We'll both wait here," Hollykit meowed, "And all three of us will attack the den when Lionkit finds a way in."

            Jaykit felt a twinge of frustration mixed with worry for his brother, but he knew Hollykit's plan was sensible and that his brother could sneak around the den well enough. "Come back as soon as you find it," he whispered as Lionkit brushed past him and disappeared into the bracken with a soft rustle. For the first time he suddenly was questioning if taking on the foxes was a good idea. But how else was he going to convince the clan that he was more than the helpless kit they treated him like?

            He strained his ears for the sound of Lionkit's return, holding his breath. It seemed an age before his brother was finally climbing back under the bracken; Jaykit let out a quiet sigh of relief.

            "The main entrance to the den is right behind this clump of bracken," Lionkit whispered, shaking leaf debris from his pelt. "But there's a smaller entrance around the back - probably an escape route."

            "Are the cubs inside?" Jaykit asked.

            "I didn't look, but I could hear them shuffling around."

            "It's not quite night-time yet," Hollykit mewed. "They might still be asleep."

            "It will be easier to surprise them if we go through the back entrance," Lionkit suggested. "If we rush them, they might run out of the den. Then it will be easy to chase them across the border!"

            "Which way is the border?" Hollykit asked.

            Lionkit snorted impatiently. "There will be a border whichever way we send them!" he snapped. "ThunderClan territory doesn't go on forever. Let's get on with it, before Thornclaw finds them and takes all the glory."

            He surged away into the bracken before either Jaykit or Hollykit could reply. He led them up the slope, out of the bracken, and over the top of the leaf-strewn mound of earth that made up the den.

            "That hole's no bigger than a rabbit hole!" Hollykit mewed in surprise.

            "Maybe that's what it used to be," Lionkit meowed. 'Who cares, as long as we can fit down it?"

            Thornclaw's meow sounded not too far away, echoing through the trees. The warrior patrol must have given up searching the bracken near the dead fox and moved on to this area of the forest.

            "Let's hurry," Lionkit meowed. "Before Thornclaw find them!"

            Taking a deep breath to calm his anxiety, Jaykit plunged down into the den. Its earthen sides rubbed claustrophobically against his flanks as he scrabbled down it. He trusted his nose to lead him into the den. Lionkit's chest pressed against his haunches and urging him onwards until he exploded into the fox den.

            The air was warm and stank of fox - more than one. Jaykit let out a threatening hiss, his heart pounding in his chest. Lionkit, at his side in an instant, spat ferociously, and Hollykit yowled angrily behind them.

            As soon as the foxes scrambled to their paws, Jaykit knew that they were so much bigger than they anticipated. His fur bushed out to twice his size as he realized that, not only were the fox cubs the same size as the three kits, there were _five_ of them! Fear shot through Jaykit as one of the cubs let out a frightening bark.

            "There's too many!" Lionkit wailed.

            "Let's get out of here!" Jaykit screeched.

            He turned and shot back up the escape route. he could feel the hot breath of one of the fox cubs on his tail fur. Were Lionkit and Hollykit trapped in the den? He couldn't turn to find out. The fox cub's jaws were snapping at his paws as it pursued him out into the forest.

            "Thornclaw!" Jaykit yowled desperately, hurtling down the bank and through the bracken.

            The warrior did not answer. Jaykit fled towards the brambles, hoping the thorns would stop the fox cub's pursuit. The fox cub plowed into the bush behind Jaykit, snapping at him whenever he slowed. Thorns scratched and tore at Jaykits nose and ears, and he closed his eyes tight. He floundered through, the fox cub plunging through the bush as if it were nothing more than tall grass. Jaykit tore free of the brambles and fled towards the familiar scent of the ThunderClan camp. The fox cub was still at his heels, growling and snapping.

            _I must be close to the camp now!_ he thought desperately, his paws skidding on wet leaves.

            Pain flared in the tip of the tail as the cub snapped at it with thorn-sharp teeth. Jaykit dug his claws into the earth, running faster than he'd ever run before until, without warning, the ground disappeared from beneath his paws.

            With a jolt of horror, Jaykit felt himself plunge into thin air.

            _I've fallen into the hollow!_


	6. Chapter 3

Jaykit tried to move, but a horrible pain shot through his limbs and clutched at his chest like claws.

            Panic flooded him. _I'm broken!_

            He tried to mew for help, but all that came out was a tiny whine.

            "Hush, little one." Warm breath stirred his fur and a soft nose nuzzled his flank.

            He figured it must be Leafpool, though she sounded different. Perhaps the throbbing in his skull was confusing him. Jaykit knew he was in the cleft in the wall of the hollow that formed Leafpool's den; soft moss carpeted the ground beneath him. Cold air blew down the walls of the den and ruffled his fur, soft as water and helping to soothe his pain. Tendrils of ivy shielded the entrance. The scent of herbs filled the air; instinctively Jaykit tried to distinguish one from another. He identified juniper easily, remembering it from the time Leafpool had made Lionkit eat some when he had a bellyache. Borage, from when Ferncloud had a fever a few moons ago.

            Where were Hollykit and Lionkit? He couldn't smell them anywhere.

            He writhed in his nest, trying to find them.

            "Lie still, little one."

            Jaykit opened his eyes and was surprised to see a she-cat he'd never met crouched beside him. He realized he must be dreaming. She wasn't a cat he recognized, but she had ThunderClan scent. In his pain, her image was hazy, just a jumble of shapes, but he could still easily identify the distinctive orange and brown markings on her lithe body as she sniffed along his pelt.

            Her eyes were large and pale green, one rimmed with more brown than the other, and her mottled face narrowed to a soft white muzzle. "Don't look so frightened," she meowed gently. "You are safe."

            "What about Hollykit and Lionkit?"

            "They are safe too," she assured him.

            Jaykit let his head rest back onto the moss as the she-cat continued nuzzle his fur, gently touching every aching spot on his body. The parts she touched seemed to flood with heat until he felt warm all over.

            "Drink now, precious," she urged. She dragged a large leaf to his mouth. It held a tiny pool of water inside its folded sides. He lapped at it; it was cool and sweet and made him sleepy. He closed his eyes.

 

            When Jaykit awoke, the she-cat was gone. His body still hurt, but not quite so much as before.

            "You're awake," Leafpool's relieved voice surprised him.

            "Where's the other she-cat?" Jaykit asked, slightly disoriented.

            "What other cat?"

            "The one who brought me water to drink." He recalled her distinctive mottled markings. "She was a tortoiseshell with a white muzzle."

            "A tortoiseshell with a white muzzle?" Leafpool's mew sharpened with interest.

            Jaykit couldn't understand why she was just repeating everything he said. He tried to lift his head, but his neck felt too stiff and he winced in pain.

            "You'll be sore for a while," Leafpool warned him. "But you were lucky that no bones were broken." She rolled a ball of water-soaked moss towards him. "Here, you should drink something."

            "I'm not thirsty," Jaykit meowed. "I told you, that other cat brought me some water."

            Leafpool pawed the moss away from his mouth. "Tell me about her," she prompted gently,

            Jaykit was starting to feel uneasy, like he'd done something wrong. He was puzzled by the tension in Leafpool's shoulders, and the way the tip of her tail stirred the moss-covered ground. "I'd never seen her before, but she smelled of ThunderClan and was in your den, so I thought it would be okay to drink the water she gave me."

            There was a long pause. Then Leafpool said, "it was Spottedleaf. One of our warrior ancestors. It must have been a dream."

            "Why would I dream of a cat I've never met?" Jaykit asked confusedly.

            "StarClan works in its own way. Spottedleaf was looking out for you," Leafpool murmured. "Jaykit? You described Spottedleaf to me perfectly. Have you always been able to see in your dreams?"

            Jaykit tipped his head to the side. "Every cat does. Why?"

            "Not every cat," Leafpool meowed. Jaykit could feel wonder emanating from her. "Not the blind ones."

            "What does that have to do with anything?" Jaykit hissed.

            He felt Leafpool's eyes on him for a moment, before she turned. "Never mind. You're lucky your ancestors were looking out for you," she meowed briskly, changing the subject. "You could have died falling over that cliff. You were lucky you weren't badly hurt!"

            "Are... Hollykit and Lionkit alright?" He asked. Spottedleaf told him they were fine, but could he really trust the word of a cat he'd never met?

            "Well, they're in a lot of trouble with Firestar and your mother. Thank StarClan that Thornclaw was close enough to save them  from that den. Those fox cubs were old enough to tear you all to pieces!"

            Jaykit lifted his chin defiantly, narrowing his eyes. 'We were trying to protect the clan!"

            "And you will someday," Leafpool promised. "But first you need to learn that taking on _five foxes_ by yourselves without backup is not a good idea! Especially for three untrained kits!"

            "Do you think Firestar will delay my apprenticeship?" Jaykit murmured, suddenly anxious.

            Leafpool said nothing.

            "Oh, you do, don't you!" Jaykit wailed. "Has he said something to you?"

            "No, my dear," Leafpool sighed. Another beat of silence passed, and Jaykit waited fearfully for her to speak.

            "Jaykit," her voice trembled. "You must know that..." she swallowed. "You might not be able to become a normal apprentice like Hollykit or Lionkit." She rested a tail along his back.

            Jaykit shrugged it away. It was as though a gale had swept him up and he could hear nothing but the rushing wind in his ears. He felt his eyes stinging, and he stifled back a sob filled with hurt and frustration. He tried to walk, to leave, but every pawstep had him wincing with pain.

            "Jaykit, wait," Leafpool meowed. "I.... I thought you understood..."

            "Understood what?" Jaykits voice was angry. He whipped around to face her. "That I'm not good enough to fight for my clan?"

            "That's not..." She stopped. "You.. you have a great mind. You could be a medicine cat..."

            "A medicine cat!" Jaykit was in disbelief. "I don't want to live _half a life,_ away from my siblings and the rest of my clan. I want to be a warrior, like papa and grandpa," his voice grew childish and whiny, filled with tears and frustration. He willed Leafpool to understand. He could _do this._

            Leafpool watched him for a moment, then a resolve seemed to fall over her. "You... _really_ want to be a warrior, don't you?"

            "More than anything," Jaykit meowed with conviction. "More than life."

            A pause. "Okay."

            "Okay?" Jaykit was confused.

            "Okay, Jaykit, I believe in you." Leafpool stretched forwards and licked the top of his head. "I know you can do it. I just..." she sighed. "It will be hard. You will face obstacles in every direction if you take this path."

            "Because I'm blind?"

            "No, because others will know that you are different, and try to discourage you." Jaykit swallowed at her words, nodding.

            "I know. But nothing will stop me from being a warrior."

            "Oh Jaykit," Leafpool purred. "Someday, you'll wow us all."


	7. Chapter 4

Hollykit waited in the center of the clearing, her heart heavy. She watched the haunches of her father, Brambleflower, walk away from her. He spoke to Brackenfur, their faces serious and upset. The sun had disappeared beyond the trees, and the cold blues of dusk made everything muddled and grey. Lionkit sat beside her, his golden coat dark in the fading light. Cold air drifted down to them, making them both shiver even with their thick coats and reminding them that leaf-bare was not so far behind them.

            She glanced around, hoping that nobody was staring at her. Mousefur was leaning against a stone outside the entrance to the elders den, her eyes closed as she took in the scents of the slowly ending day. Beside her, Longtail slowly took on the job of cleaning his pelt, the pains in his hips obvious from the way he sat crooked, shifting as if he just couldn't get comfortable.

            Close by, Dustpelt was sharing tongues with Ferncloud, comforting her from the distress of watching Jaykit fall into the hollow. Dustpelt's apprentice, Hazelpaw, nodded to him before carrying a mouse from the fresh-kill pile over to the apprentice's den where her littermates, Berrypaw and Mousepaw, were already eating.

            Hollykit caught Mousepaw's eye. He blinked at her sympathetically before looking away. Hollykit lifted her chin a bit higher, swallowing her fear. She would take whatever punishment Firestar gave her like a warrior.

            Suddenly the dry stalks of ivy at the entrance of the medicine den shifted and rattled. Leafpool emerged and made her way over to Brambleflower, exchanging a quick word before heading back in.

            "I wonder if Jaykit's okay," Hollykit mewed somberly.

            "He.. He'll be alright," Lionkit meowed. Neither of them felt very certain.

            The memory was all too fresh in her mind. Jaykit lay in a heap at the edge of the hollow, dirt and rocks scattered around him, dislodged from his fall. Ferncloud and Leafpool were crouched over him, Brambleflower just mouse-lengths away, his eyes round with raw fear. He darted forwards, his fur spiked in horror, and nudged his son gently, as if he were trying to wake him from sleep. Jaykit didn't stir. Ferncloud let out a low cry, and Leafpool instructed Brambleflower to help her carry him to her den. Jaykit had never looked so tiny before, just a small scrap of grey fur being carried by their father. Leafpool made sure his back legs didn't drag on the ground. Blood spattered his face and ears, and his head rolled listlessly with each step. They disappeared into the den, and Hollykit hadn't seen her brother since.

            He could have died.

            She dug her claws into the ground to stop them from trembling, the thought piercing her heart like a thorn. The three of them had been together since they were born. Losing Jaykit would be worse than losing her tail.

            "We shouldn't have left the camp," Hollykit sighed ruefully.

            "I wish you'd have realized that sooner!"

            Firestar's meow took her by surprise. Tiny stones were still tumbling into the clearing from where he'd jumped down from his den. Behind him, her parents followed and stood just behind their leader. Hollykit's heart sank when she saw the disappointment and anger in her parents' eyes. She stared down at her paws, remembering the disastrous end to their assault on the fox's den.

            Thornclaw's patrol had arrived just in time to see Hollykit and Lionkit flee the den, four fox-cubs on their tails. She ran past him, hearing him yowl in surprise. She was too afraid to stop, the snapping jaws behind her threatening to tear fur and rip skin should she slow down. She ran until she barreled into her father, his patrol heading back to the hollow from the lake-shore.

            "What's going on?" Her father asked, standing in her way as she attempted to run past. "What are you doing out here?"

            Hollykit had tried to explain but she was panting too hard, her legs shaking and her heart thudding like a woodpecker against a hollow tree.

            Spiderleg caught up to her, skidding to a stop in front of Brambleflower. "The kits found the fox cubs," the black warrior reported. "It seems they tried to set up a patrol of their own."

            Hollykit did not dare to catch her father's eye.

            "Where are Jaykit and Lionkit?" Brambleflower asked, his voice tense.

            "Lionkit's with Thornclaw," Spiderleg reported. "We haven't found Jaykit yet, but the foxes have scattered all over the forest."

            Brambleflower looked up to the sky and closed his eyes, his tail twitching. Then, he unceremoniously escorted his two kits back to camp.

            And then, they'd found Jaykit.

            "Jaykit's going to be okay," Firestar meowed. Hollykit and Lionkit both simultaneously let out a sigh of relief, quickly sharing a glance.

            "But," Firestar continued, his eyes sharp. "Thornclaw's patrol has yet to return, which means he's still hunting the fox cubs."

            "What possessed you to hunt the foxes on your own?" Brambleflower growled.

            "Brambleflower, I know they are your kits but I will handle this for now," Firestar meowed. Hollykit ducked her head in shame. She hated that her leader was also her grandfather at times like this; being scolded by her grandpa, someone who was just as dear to her as her own father, was not an experience she enjoyed.

            "We only wanted to help the clan!" Lionkit meowed.

            "Then do as your told!" Firestar snapped. "You are far too young to be making rash decisions on your own. What if Jaykit had died today? Would _that_ have helped the clan?" His fierce gaze flicked from Hollykit to Lionkit, and they both shook their heads.

            Firestar pressed on. "You almost led the foxes right into the camp!"

            "We're sorry," Hollykit whispered.

            "We thought we could find the foxes -" Lionkit began.

            "If you thought at _all_ you'd have let our warriors deal with it! Then the clan would be safe!" Firestar lashed his tail. "Instead, we have one badly injured kit and a forest that isn't safe for cats to hunt in!"

            Hollykit glanced guiltily at her brother. He met her eyes, then ducked his head.

            Squirrelflight's tail ticked side to side. Firestar nodded at her to speak.

            "I'm so disappointed in you both!" She burst out.

            "What about Jaykit?" Lionkit asked. "We didn't force him to come with us!"

            "We'll talk to Jaykit later," Brambleflower meowed. "For now, we're concerned with you two. You both have no more sense than hatchling chicks!"

            "Are you going to stop us from becoming apprentices?" Lionkit asked in a small voice.

            "If it were up to me, I'd make you wait for another moon." Brambleflower meowed. "But it's your grandfather's decision."

            Firestar narrowed his eyes. "I'm not going to decide tonight," he told them. "For now, you three are no longer to go anywhere without a warrior present. You must, at all times, make sure either Daisy or Ferncloud know where you are. This is _your_ responsibility, not theirs, and if you aren't where you're supposed to be, then you're clearly not ready for the responsibilities of an apprentice."

            "We won't wander off again," Lionkit promised.

            "Hollykit?" Firestar prompted.

            "I won't do anything that will keep me from being an apprentice," she mewed, meaning every word.

            "Good," Firestar meowed. "I hope you learned something today. True warriors think of the clan's safety above all else; even glory." He turned away, heading over to his deputy Brackenfur.

            His parting words seared Hollykit's fur; she'd let her clan down. She glanced nervously up at her parents. "We're very sorry," she whispered.

            "I should hope so," Squirrelflight sighed.

            "You should be setting an example," Brambleflower meowed. "You're old enough to know better."

            Squirrelflight's eyes softened, and she bent down and licked both Hollykit and Lionkit between their ears. "I know you thought you were doing the right thing," she meowed sympathetically.

            "We just wanted to help the clan," Hollykit insisted.

            "Your time will come," Brambleflower said.

            "Is Jaykit really alright?" Lionkit mewed.

            "Yes, he's recovering right now." Brambleflower told him. "When he's recovered, he'll join you in the nursery."

            "Will he be well enough in time for the naming ceremony?" Hollykit asked.

            "If there _is_ a naming ceremony," Lionkit added.

           Squirrelflight shared a look with Brambleflower, then ran her large, fluffy tail down her son's flank. "You know that Jaykit won't be able to become an apprentice like you two," she meowed softly.

            "What do you mean?" Hollykit stared at her mother.

            "Well, it would be impossible to have a blind warrior-" Squirrelflight started.

            "No it wouldn't!" Hollykit spat, anger suddenly bursting. "Jaykit is _just as capable_ as we are!" She glanced at her brother for support.

            "He's the one who found the fox cubs, not us!" Lionkit added quickly.

            "He was?" Brambleflower asked, surprised.

            "He senses everything in the camp better than we can!" Hollykit insisted.

            Squirrelflight looked at her with such sadness that it made her entire body tremble with indignation.

            "What would happen, then?" Lionkit asked, his voice small. "What would he do?"

            "Well, he could train as a medicine cat," Squirrelflight suggested.

            Hollykit's eyes stung. She shook her head, an image growing in her mind and clinging like to her thoughts like burrs.

            It was Jaykit, but he was much older; tall and skinny. He looked ill, as if he'd stopped taking care of himself. His normally shiny and silky pelt was dull and limp. He was bent over in the medicine den, sorting herbs into piles. He was barely paying attention to his task, going through the motions. He was just existing, and it was obvious that he held no joy for his life. His whiskers drooped and his eyes held such misery that Hollykit's heart ached. His tail twitched, and he let out a dusky sigh that ended in weak coughing.

            Hollykit knew then that, if Jaykit became a medicine cat, he would be absolutely miserable. She swallowed, her ears flicking the image to the back of her mind. She could _not_ let that happen.

            Before she could tell her parents what she thought, she heard pawsteps pounding towards the camp. A voice called from beyond the barrier, and Thornclaw shoved his way through moments later. Behind him, Spiderleg, Poppypaw and Mousepaw hurried through. Firestar and Brackenfur padded up to meet them.

            "Poppypaw and Mousepaw managed to kill one of the foxes," Thornclaw reported. "Spiderleg chased one over the ShadowClan border, and I killed one just below the Sky Oak. There's no sign of the other two."

            Hollykit's ears burned with shame.

            "The cubs are old enough to look after themselves," Thornclaw added. "We should keep an eye out while on patrol."

            "Good work," Firestar praised. To Brackenfur, he said "Make sure no apprentices go out on their own, and patrols should have at least four cats each."

            Hollykit caught Squirrelflight's eye. Her mother blinked at her kindly. "Don't be too hard on yourself," she murmured. "Every cat makes mistakes. You just have to learn from them."

            "I'll make it up to the clan," Hollykit promised.

            "I know you will. Why don't you go visit Jaykit? I'm sure he'd love the company," her mother suggested.

            "Can I go too?" Lionkit begged.

            "Of course," Brambleflower purred. "You three haven't been apart for very long since you were born. Just be careful with him," he added. "He's very injured."

            "We will!" They meowed, turning and quickly trotting towards the den.

            The two nosed through the ivy tendrils that covered the Medicine Cat den's entrance a moment later, stepping into the cool, herb-scented air. Jaykit lay by the pool, and he turned his blind blue eyes towards his siblings as they entered.

            "Hi, Hollykit, Lionkit." His mew sounded tired. His pelt was ragged, and he had poultices smeared across various scratches on his body. Hollykit felt a stab of pain. He'd nearly died.

            "You don't need to feel bad," Jaykit flicked his tail and gave a weak purr. "I'm fine."

            Hollykit blinked. How did her brother always know exactly what she was thinking? It was slightly disturbing sometimes how accurate he could be. Blind or not, her brother was more in tuned to other cat's emotions and thoughts than any other cat she'd met.

            "I'm not going to die," he went on.

            "I never thought you were," Hollykit lied, padding forwards. Lionkit shifted beside her.

            "I'm glad you're okay," he meowed, shuffling his paws as if he were unsure of what to do.

            "I'm not going to break, you can come closer," Jaykit meowed.

            Instantly Lionkit rushed forwards, nuzzling Jaykit's cheek with his own very gently. Hollykit was surprised her brother could be so gentle - he was always the most destructive of the three of them.

            Hollykit padded up and licked Jaykit between the ears when Lionkit had pulled back. Jaykit's rumbling weak purr made her heart swell at the familiarity. She pressed her nose briefly to his forehead.

            She didn't know what she would do if she'd lost one of her brothers. She was so, so glad that Jaykit was alright.

            "What did Grampa say?" Jaykit croaked after his two siblings had backed off, laying down close to him.

            "We have to stay in the nursery until he decides if we'll be apprentices," Lionkit mewed.

            " _If?"_ Jaykit echoed.

            "If we stay in the camp and do as we're told, we should be alright," Hollykit meowed. She hoped it was true; she'd never seen Firestar so angry.

            "It _has_ to be okay!" Jaykit struggled to his paws, but winced.

            "Are you okay?" Hollykit mewed in alarm.

            "He'll be sore for a while," Leafpool stuck her head out of the cleft in the back of the den, where she was mixing herbs. "A wash should be good for him, if you'd two like to help. Just don't touch the poultices."

            "Of course," Lionkit mewed, his nose crickled up at the thought of touching the poultices with his tongue. Jaykit lay down again on the soft moss, and let out a pained sigh as his siblings began to wash him gently.

            "Not so roughly!" Jaykit complained after a moment. "I'm sore all over."

            "Sorry," Lionkit murmured, trying to lap at his fur with softer strokes. Hollykit did the same, but still caught Jaykit wincing as they neared a particularly sore spot.

            "You're not as gentle as Spottedleaf," he sighed.

            Hollykit stopped licking. "Who?"

            "Spottedleaf," Jaykit repeated. "Leafpool says she's one of our warrior ancestors. She came to me in a dream and poked me all over with her nose."

            "How can you dream about a cat when you've never met her?" Lionkit asked, tilting his head in confusion.

            Leafpool carried a bundle of herbs towards them and sat down. "Are you telling them about Spottedleaf?"

            Jaykit nodded.

            "Who is she?" Hollykit asked.

            "She was the ThunderClan medicine cat when Firestar first came to the forest," Leafpool explained. "She died before I was born, but has given me StarClan's guidance since I became a medicine cat." Hollykit noticed that Leafpool's amber eyes were glittering in excitement. "Spottedleaf was very wise, and she never stopped looking out for her clan. I think that's why she visited Jaykit, and why she still guides me in dreams."

            "Does Cinderpelt visit you too?" Hollykit asked.

            "Sometimes," Leafpool answered. "But usually it's Spottedleaf."

            Hollykit pondered this for a moment, surprised that Leafpool could have such an obvious bond with a cat who had long since died. They were distracted when Jaykit let out a pained hiss; Lionkit had been washing a sore spot on Jaykit's flank.

            "Sorry!" Lionkit drew back.

            "S'okay," Jaykit moaned. "I'm just sore."

            "I'll grab some poppy seeds," Leafpool meowed, standing and heading to the back of the den, disappearing into the cleft in the rock.

            "Did Spottedleaf give _you_ any guidance?" Lionkit asked.

            "Nah. She gave me water though," Jaykit mewed.

            Hollykit barely heard them; she was lost in thought. Leafpool was respected by her clanmates, and by healing them she earned their respect. She even had the respect of StarClan. Maybe, if Hollykit wanted to be important to her clan, becoming a medicine cat was the way to go.

            She watched Leafpool give Jaykit some seeds, and blinked at his eyes grew sleepy. The scent of herbs permeated the air, stronger when Leafpool was near, and she wrinkled her nose.

            No, that was not the path for her, she decided. If she wanted to be important, _really_ be important, she would have to become leader. The stories of glory that they were told since they were still covered in kit-soft fluff were all about the leaders and their deputies. _That_ is the life she must lead.

            "Is he going to be okay?" Lionkit's meow brought her from her thoughts. Jaykit had fallen asleep, trembling slightly.

            "He'll be alright," Leafpool murmured, nosing Jaykit's silvery fur lightly. "He just needs to rest for now. You two should go back to the nursery."

            Hollykit and Lionkit padded over to the entrance, but lingered in front of the ivy tendrils, unsure. They'd never left their brother behind before.

            "Jaykit will recover," Leafpool reassured, sensing their hesitance.

            "Will you get us if he needs us?" Lionkit asked. They both winced as they heard Ferncloud calling them from the nursery.

            "He'll be fine!" Leafpool purred, amusement clear in her eyes. "Now, go! Before you get in trouble again!"

            Hollykit nodded, and the two rushed from the medicine cat den and made their way over to the nursery. Hollykit eyed the Highledge as they passed. She knew what she wanted to do to serve her clan, and she could feel the determination buzzing through her paws.

            She wanted to be leader.


	8. Chapter 5

Hollykit awoke just before dawn, the hazy darkness that shrouded the nursery warm and cozy with her sleeping littermates beside her. She cuddled close to Jaykit, who was curled up tightly beside her. He'd returned to the nursery just the day before, and was almost completely healed. Once his bruises stopped being so tender, Leafpool let him return to his littermates. Hollykit sighed contentedly. She belonged with her two brothers, and nowhere else. Even though Jaykit was only across the clearing, it has felt weird to sleep without him.

            An owl hooted in the distance as Hollykit lay, wide-eyed and awake, in her nest. She was too excited to go back to sleep, as her father had told her last night that Firestar would be going ahead with the naming ceremony after all.

            "You've behaved well and not left the nursery without permission," Brambleflower had said as Hollykit fetched some fresh-kill from the pile. "Tomorrow, you will be made apprentices."

            Hollykit twisted her head around excitedly to look over at where her brothers were already eating. "What about Jaykit?" She asked worriedly.

            "Don't worry," Brambleflower had purred. His eyes flashed excitedly. "I've spoken to Firestar. He hasn't forgotten about Jaykit."

            Hollykit rolled over in her nest and sat up, stretching and smoothing down the fur on her leg with short, quick laps of her tongue. She could hear the loud chattering of sparrows in the distance, awake and ready before the watery sunlight of dawn had even crept above the distant mountains. Her brothers were still fast asleep beside her, Jaykit curling tighter into himself when Hollykit drew away, taking her warmth with her. Lionkit, sprawled on his back with his paws stretched out to both sides of the nest, only let out a small mumble, still dreaming.

            "Awake already?" Ferncloud asked, Daisy sleeping beside her. Her two kits, Icekit and Foxkit, were awake as well, and drowsily blinked up at Hollykit with matching green eyes.

            "I'm too excited to sleep!" Hollykit whispered back.      

            "You may go outside if you like," Ferncloud meowed. "The dawn hunting patrol should be back before the sun rises, if you'd like some warm fresh-kill."

            Icekit perked up, her black and silver spotted coat making her an almost exact copy of her mother. Her pale green eyes grew round as she looked at Hollykit. "You won't be sleeping in the nursery tonight," she whispered.

            "No, I'll be an apprentice," Hollykit purred.

            "I'm so jealous! I can't wait to be an apprentice," Foxkit meowed a little too loudly. He ducked his head at Ferncloud's warning _shh!_

            "You will be soon enough," Hollykit promised. "You two are not much younger than us."

            "Will you come back and tell us what it's like being an apprentice?" Icekit pleaded.

            "Of course," Hollykit purred. Icekit brushed her muzzle gently, and Hollykit licked Foxkit between the ears.

            "Bye, Hollykit," Icekit meowed.

            "Bye, you two," Hollykit answered, her heart squeezing slightly with sadness. "Be good for Ferncloud."

            Hollykit blinked gently at them, then turned and squeezed out of the nursery.

            The clearing sparkled with dew, the birds loud against the backdrop of a barely-lit sky. A light misting of fog clung to the bushes and clefts that rimmed the top of the hollow. Hollykit stretched fully, first her forepaws, then her hind, arching her back and enjoying the clean scent of the morning forest.

            "Good morning!" Squirrelflight called from the front of the warriors den. She was washing her long pelt, her paw raised to scrub at her ear. Beside her, Brambleflower sat, his eyes alight with happiness as he gazed upon his daughter.

            "Morning!" Hollykit answered, padding up to meet them. Her father reached for her with his massive paws as she drew close, pulling her into his chest. She heard his rumbling purr and squealed in surprise.

            "Stop that!" Squirrelflight laughed, thudding her paw against her mate's shoulder. "She's not a kit anymore!" He let her go, him and Squirrelflight both chuckling at her long, tousled fur.

            "It's your big day!" Brambleflower purred. Squirrelflight leaned over and smoothed down Hollykit's fur with long strokes of her tongue.

            "I'm so excited!" Hollykit chirped, moving out of the way of her mother's fussing. She was larger than Squirrelflight, and it was easy to stand up and get her face out of the way.

            Before Squirrelflight could force her daughter into a full cleansing, the thorn barrier trembled; the dawn patrol was returning. Cloudtail emerged with his apprentice Cinderpaw close behind him, her tail high in the air. Stonefur emerged last, carrying a magpie from a lucky catch on his way back to the camp.

            "All clear?" Brambleflower asked as Cloudtail shook droplets of dew from his long, white pelt.

            "No cat has crossed the boundaries," Cloudtail reported. "Although, WindClan seems adamant on keeping their border markers very fresh."

            Hollykit noticed Squirrelflight's ears prick warily.

            "Do you think it could be a problem?" Brambleflower asked.

            Cloudtail looked thoughtful. "I'm not sure. I do think they're making quite the effort to remind us that they're there."

            "You think it's aggression?"

            "Not aggression," Cloudtail shook his head. "However, they never used to be so thorough with their border markings."

            "Should we step up patrols?" Brambleflower asked Brackenfur as he slipped out of the warriors den and into the conversation.    

            Brackenfur paused. "What's your opinion? I think we should ignore it for now."

            "I agree; I think if we stepped up patrols, WindClan could become aggressive." Brackenfur nodded at Brambleflower in agreement.

            "Why are you asking him?" Ashfur snapped. "Shouldn't that be Firestar's decision? Brambleflower isn't deputy anymore."

            Hollykit was surprised at Ashfur's comment. Brambleflower glanced sharply his way, but Ashfur's gaze only held concern, despite his testy tone.

            "I'll speak to him of course," Brackenfur meowed coolly. "But there's no point in overreacting if WindClan is just trying to provoke us."

            Squirrelflight looked at Cloudtail. "Did you refresh the boundary markers?"

            Cloudtail nodded.

            Hollykit jumped in surprise as she felt another pelt brush against hers. Lionkit had padded over to join her, Jaykit close behind.

            "What's going on?" Lionkit asked.

            "The dawn patrol came back," Hollykit answered. The idea of WindClan pressing at their borders concerned her, but she gave a small shiver of excitement, knowing that if it came to a fight that she would be ready to defend her clanmates. She would prove that she was worthy of being an apprentice.

            She glanced around the clearing. Spiderleg and Thornclaw shared a pigeon beneath the HighLedge. Whitewing chatted with Birchfall near the edge of camp, cleaning their claws with their tongues in between words. Honeypaw and Poppypaw were play fighting on a grassy patch outside the apprentices den. As she watched, the apprentices stopped fighting and glanced up at the HighLedge, their ears pricking in interest. Hollykit followed their gaze, anticipation trembling through her.

            Firestar was emerging from his den, his mate Sandstorm picking her way down into the camp. The first dull rays of sunlight danced across his pelt, glowing as bright as flames. Hollykit's stomach fluttered nervously as Firestar called to the clan.

            "Let all cat's old enough to catch their own prey gather here beneath the HighLedge for a clan meeting!"

            Hollykit glanced at her brothers. This was it! This is what they'd waited their whole lives for! Lionkit's tail was straight in excitement, but Jaykit's eyes were bright with nerves, his claws digging into the earth. He was excited, too, but Hollykit could tell that he was worried that he wouldn't be made an apprentice. Hollykit brushed her tail reassuringly across his back. He didn't respond.

            Brambleflower and Squirrelflight quickly rushed over to them, smoothing down fur and purring encouragement.

            "Are you ready?" Brambleflower's eyes were shining.

            "Of course!" Hollykit meowed.

            "You'll all do great," he purred, turning and sitting with a group of other warriors. Squirrelflight gave all three of them a quick nuzzle before joining him.

            Mousefur emerged stiffly from the elder's den, Longtail limping behind her. Honeypaw, Berrypaw and Poppypaw clustered together, whispering and glancing at the three kits in the middle. Within moments, the entire clan that wasn't away on patrol was gathered around the HighLedge, gazing up at Firestar. Hollykit imagined herself in his place, with all the eyes on her.

            She padded forwards, her brothers beside her. The cats cleared a way for the three, Daisy purring a quick 'good luck!' as they passed.

            "I gather you all here today for one of my favourite duties," Firestar meowed. "Hollykit, Jaykit and Lionkit are now six moons old."

            So Jaykit was going to be included in the ceremony after all. Hollykit heard her brother let out a shaky breath.

            "They have had an... _adventurous_ kithood," Firestar meowed, a chuckle running through the older members of the clan. "However, I believe they have learned valuable lessons, and that they are ready to take on the responsibilities of apprenticeship."

            The clan meowed in approval. Firestar waited for the noise to die down before continuing. "Lionkit!"

            Lionkit bounded forwards, his long golden tabby fur fluffed up in excitement.

            "From this day forward, until you receive your warrior name, you will be known as Lionpaw."

            Berrypaw called his name and the other apprentices joined in. Firestar raised his eyes to the cloud-darkened sky and meowed loudly over the chanting. "I pray unto StarClan to look down upon you and guide you until you hold in your paws the strength and courage of a warrior."

            Lionpaw's eyes sparkled as he gazed upon his leader.

            "Ashfur," Firestar called.

            The pale grey and black tom lifted his head. His pale blue eyes glimmered as he stepped towards Lionpaw, excitement showing in a slight twitch of his tail tip.

            "You have mentored Birchfall, who is a credit to his clan," Firestar meowed. "Now I ask you prove once more to ThunderClan your ability to be a great mentor and help Lionpaw on his way to becoming an amazing warrior."

            Ashfur dipped his head at Firestar. "I won't let my clan down," he vowed. Lionpaw hurried up and touched his nose to Ashfur's, still trembling in excitement.

            "Hollykit," Firestar meowed.

            Hollykit forgot to be nervous, her paws carrying her fast towards the center of the clearing. She skidded to a halt in front of the HighLedge. Firestar's whiskers twitched in amusement.

            "From this day forward, until you receive your warrior name, you will be known as Hollypaw."

            "Hollypaw! Hollypaw!" This time, Cinderpaw led the chant.

            Hollypaw stared at the apprentices as they called her new name. Berrypaw and Hazelpaw both seemed a lot bigger and stronger, though Hollypaw knew she wasn't that much smaller. However, in the nursery, she and her brothers had been the oldest kits, and now she was one of the youngest out of her new denmates. Her heart drummed like paws racing across the forest floor.

            "Sorreltail," Firestar called. Hollypaw felt a rush of new excitement rush through her. Sorreltail was an amazing warrior!

            The calico she-cat gave her an encouraging blink before stepping up beside her.

            "I know I am putting Hollypaw in safe paws," Firestar meowed. "I pray that StarClan guides you both towards the right paths."

            Hollypaw's tail curled. This was her first step towards earning the respect of her clan.

            "I will teach her everything I know," Sorreltail promised. She touched Hollypaw's nose with her own, green eyes shining in excitement.

            Hollypaw turned and stepped back, watching nervously as her brother, Jaykit, padded towards the center of the clearing.

            "Surely he can't become an apprentice?" Whitewing's comment hung heavy in the still, damp air. Jaykit's back stiffened.

            "Longtail stayed in the camp when he went blind," Spiderleg murmured, as if he agreed that blind cats couldn't be warriors.

            "It wouldn't be safe out in the forest," Thornclaw put in.

            "Poor lad," Hollypaw heard Rainwhisker meow.

            Hollypaw's fur bristled, watching as her brother's tail stiffened and his ears lay back. _Jaykit is just as capable as we are! He deserves a chance, just like everyone else!_

            "I want to be an apprentice." Jaykit's meow trembled in frustration.

            "Of course," Firestar agreed. "Jaykit, from now on until you receive your warrior name, you will be known as Jaypaw."


	9. Chapter 6

_Yes!_ Jaypaw let out a sigh of relief, his tail twitching with leftover anxiety. The other apprentices chanted his new name into the sky, and he felt pride bubbling up in his paws. His sibling's voices joined in the chant comforted him.

            "Brightheart," Firestar called.

            Jaypaw stiffened - he knew why Firestar chose her. Mixed emotions circled in his heart. The comments from his clanmates still stung him - was he the only cat besides Leafpool who believed he could actually do this? What if he couldn't?

            A seed of doubt planted itself in his heart.

            Jaypaw's new mentor padded up to stand beside him. He felt her short pelt brush his, and her excitement flooded him. He knew, realistically, that Brightheart was an incredible warrior. However, the implications of a one-eyed cat training a blind cat was just so... embarrassing. He wanted to fit in, not stand out.

            "You have overcome great difficulties in your journey to becoming a warrior, and I have no doubt that, through your guidance, you can help Jaypaw overcome his own. No cat knows better than you that we shouldn't underestimate ThunderClan cats," Firestar's words held warning, and there was a low murmur from the cats behind him.

            "I will do my very best," Brightheart declared. Jaypaw touched his nose to hers briefly.

            "It will be hard for you," Brightheart whispered to him before they drew away. "But I promise I will teach you how to protect your clan even without sight."

            Jaypaw nodded, her pride flooding through him. He was her first apprentice; he had no doubt that she was determined to make him the best he could be. But the pity rolling off some of the cats behind him, including Squirrelflight, made a lump form in his throat.

            _They pity both of us_ , Jaypaw thought angrily. _They don't believe that I can do it. There's not a cat here who thinks I can become a great warrior. My own mother doubts me._

But then he heard Brightheart purr encouragement, and remembered Leafpool's words to him when she told him she believed in him. Lionpaw and Hollypaw sent no pity his way, and they never had. He swallowed and raised his head defiantly.

            _This is what I'm meant to do. I_ will _be a warrior!_

            "Jaypaw! Lionpaw! Hollypaw!" The chants and cheers of the clan erupted around him as the ceremony came to an end. Jaypaw heard the tell-tale sounds of pebbles rattling as Firestar leapt down from the HighLedge.

            "Come on, Lionpaw," Ashfur meowed as the rest of the cats went back to their daily tasks. "I'll show you the best places for hunting!"

            "Right now?" Lionpaw squeaked excitedly.

            "Why not?"

            Hollypaw's paws pattered the ground around Sorreltail. "Can we go with?"

            "Sure," Sorreltail purred in amusement.

            "I don't have a problem with that," Ashfur agreed.

            "What about Jaypaw?" Lionpaw asked hopefully.

            "I'd like to take Jaypaw out by myself, if that's alright," Brightheart said. "We can join you in training another time."

            Jaypaw sighed forlornly, listening to his siblings leave the camp with hurried steps, their excitement obvious.

            "Are we going to see the forest today?" He asked Brightheart.

            "In a moment, yes," Brightheart promised. "But first, I wanted to talk to you about something."

            "Okay?" Jaypaw was confused. Had he done something wrong already?

            "Trust me," She said. "We're going to visit Longtail. While we're there, you can remove all the dry moss; but we won't be there long, okay?"

            "Right," Jaypaw meowed unenthusiastically. He could only imagine what sort of advice Longtail could give him. Jaypaw had been blind his whole life - it was as natural to him as breathing. He could probably give _Longtail_ better tips.

            "Come with me," Brightheart touched her tail to Jaypaw's shoulder.

            Dragging his paws, Jaypaw followed his mentor towards the ancient fallen tree that acted at the Elders' den.

            "It's Brightheart and Jaypaw," Brightheart called through the spindly branches that brushed the ground near the entrance.

            "Come in, come in," Longtail meowed.

            Brightheart entered the den, the branches rattling together as she disturbed them. Jaypaw followed, keeping his head low. He'd been in the elders' den before, and by scenting the air he knew that Longtail was alone. Mousefur must have gone for a walk in the forest.

            "Congratulations, Jaypaw!" Longtail greeted them. "You've been gifted an amazing mentor."

            "Thank you, Longtail," Jaypaw could feel Brightheart's shy embarrassment at the praise.

            "Firestar has set you quite the challenge for your first apprentice, Brightheart," Longtail continued.

            "Just because I'm blind doesn't mean-" Jaypaw started.

            "I don't mean your blindness," Longtail interrupted. "I mean your attitude."

            "What's wrong with my attitude?"

            "Not every cat would try to go out and hunt foxes before they're even out of the nursery," Longtail purred in amusement.

            Jaypaw bristled; he was only trying to help his clan! Before he could reply, Brightheart was telling him to start his chores. He sighed and began feeling for all the dry, scratchy bits of moss that were sticking in the nest.

            "Ah, it's you two," Mousefur padded into the den, her fur smelling of the forest. Her paw steps were uneven with a limp, and she breathed in sharply as she sat down. "You've missed a bit here," she pointed out.

            "He's only just started," Longtail meowed.

            "So?" Mousefur snorted. "Does that mean he'll be in here till sunfall? I was hoping to get some sleep."

            "It's not my fault you're stiff!" Jaypaw snapped. "You're the one who went into the forest when it was damp!"

            "How'd you know I was stiff?" Mousefur's mew sharpened with interest. He felt her looking at him closely.

            "You were limping," Jaypaw flung a wad of dry moss towards the entrance of the den, where a small pile was already forming. "And when you sat down, you gasped like it hurt."

            A purr of amusement rumbled out of the old she-cat's throat. "You're sharp," she meowed. "Brightheart is going to have her paws full!"

           "Jaypaw," Brightheart began as Jaypaw moved towards Mousefur's nest to take out the dirty moss. "I wanted to talk to you about something, something that Longtail and I, and you, have in common."

            Jaypaw snorted. "I can guess what that is."

            "I heard the comments our clanmates were making today," Brightheart sighed, skipping to the point. Jaypaw went still.

            "I hate having to say this, but your apprenticeship will be much more difficult than most, and before you say anything I don't mean because of your blindness. Those comments, of cats not recognizing your potential, of them _doubting_ you... they will only go away once you prove to them that you are capable." Brightheart paused. "I _know_ you can do this, Jaypaw. And I know that you want this more than anything. I wanted to be a warrior more than anything as well, and when my eye was stolen from me I was devastated. I thought that nothing would ever be alright."

            "I remember," Longtail mewed sadly. "Bluestar named you 'Lostface'."

            Brightheart flinched at the name. "Yes," she said. "But I didn't give up." She lay her tail across Jaypaw's shoulders. "You mustn't give up either."

            "You don't need sight to be a warrior," Longtail meowed. "Your ears and nose work well enough, and your mind is as sharp as your tongue. In time, your clan will know you as a great warrior, and you can fight their words with your actions, not your temper."

            Jaypaw swallowed, flicking the last ball of moss towards the entrance.

            "I really want to be a warrior," he meowed.

            "You will be," Brightheart purred.

            "Every young cat seems to surpass their seniors," Mousefur put in. "You and your siblings are no different. I look forward to watching your warrior ceremony."

            Jaypaw thought for a second on what they'd told him. The comments bothered him, he couldn't deny it. Knowing other cats went through the same treatment should have made him feel better, but he still felt alone. Brightheart still had one eye, and she had trained as a warrior before she lost it. Longtail had stopped doing warrior tasks when his vision left, and his clanmates encouraged it.

            _"I believe in you,"_ Leafpool's voice echoed in his mind.

            "I'm done," Jaypaw nodded to the moss.

            "Yes," Jaypaw could feel Brightheart's eyes on him. "Let's go out into the forest now." Brightheart began helping him to bundle the piles of moss out of the elders' den.

            _At last!_ Jaypaw thought. _Lionpaw and Hollypaw have been out for ages._

"Good luck!" Longtail called as the two left the den.

            Brightheart led her apprentice out of the camp and up the steep slope that led towards the lake. "This trail leads to the top of the ridge," she said. "It's steep."

            "Okay," Jaypaw decided not to tell her that he'd already felt the ground sloping upwards beneath his paws. He followed his mentor as she weaved through the trees, feeling the slippery, damp leaves shifting with his weight under his paws.

            "Watch out!" Brightheart called, but Jaypaw had already scented the bark in front of him and swerved just in time to avoid the tree in front of him, his whiskers grazing the trunk.

            "The trees are thick here, but there isn't much undergrowth."

            "Oh," Jaypaw meowed. The scent of a mouse trail distracted him, and he was tempted to follow it as the ground beneath him began to flatten out.

            "We're at the top of the ridge now," Brightheart told him. "Follow my scent and I'll lead you along the crest."

            "Right," Jaypaw meowed. He could tell by the slope of the land that the forest fell away on either side; it felt as though they were climbing the spine of a great cat.

            "If we go up this trail we'll be out of the trees soon."

            Jaypaw was beginning to feel out of breath, so he didn't reply. Instead, he focused on the scent of the lake approaching before him and the sound of the waves lapping against the shore.

            "We're out of the trees now, so you don't have to worry about bumping into anything," Brightheart said. Jaypaw already knew this; a light, damp wind brushed his pelt, clean and full and carrying the scents of the lake.

            "Stop here," Brightheart warned. Jaypaw had already stopped, however, feeling the ground drop steeply away at his paw tips.

            Scents flooded his senses, and he opened his mouth to let them bathe his tongue. He couldn't quite place some of the more distant and strange smells, but he knew that they were looking out over the forest and lake. They must be at the shore, because the waves of the lake were slapping against the rocks just ahead, and Jaypaw could smell damp sand.

            "We've followed the ridge out of the forest and right up to the end," Brightheart explained. "The land slopes down steeply here towards the lake, and there's a bit of a beach down there along the water. RiverClan territory is straight ahead, across the lake. Over where the sun sets is ShadowClan territory. And if you look to where the sun rises you'll see-" she broke off abruptly.

            For the first time that day, Jaypaw felt sorry for his mentor. She must have hoped her first apprentice would be a healthy kit that she wouldn't have to make special allowances for. If only she realized that he didn't want any special allowances, that he didn't _need_ them.

            "I might not be able to see what you see," Jaypaw meowed. "But I can tell a lot from what I smell, hear and feel." He lifted his nose. "Over there is ShadowClan territory, not just because the scent of them is strong enough to scare a rabbit, but because the scent of pine needles tells me that there isn't much undergrowth, and that the cats who live there must be cunning and good at stalking." He turned his head. "And over there I can smell the prairies. The wind comes in a great, unbroken sweep, undisturbed by trees. The WindClan cats who hunt there must be small and fast to chase prey out in the open." Then he gazed out at the lake in front of them. "I know RiverClan lives across the lake, although I can't smell them. Their scent is covered up by the lake, which smells stronger today because of the wind. But I know that RiverClan will feel the rain today first because the direction of the wind is driving the waves this way - I can hear them slapping against the shore."

            "You can tell all that without seeing it?"

            "Yes, of course." Jaypaw flicked his ears. "Also, there's a patrol coming."

            Brightheart stiffened, listening intently for it. Sure enough, a ThunderClan patrol was climbing the ridge towards them, rustling through the bracken and heather. He knew from their scents that it was Dustpelt, Thornclaw, Hazelpaw and Poppypaw, but he kept that detail to himself. He was pleased that he'd managed to impress Brightheart with his description of what was around him, but he didn't want her to think he was showing off.

            "Hi!" Poppypaw was the first out of the bracken. "You're out of the camp at last!" She bounded towards them with Thornclaw just behind. Dustpelt and Hazelpaw crested the ridge only seconds later.

            "Isn't being an apprentice great?" Hazelpaw added. "I was so excited my first day!"

            _We haven't done much yet,_ Jaypaw thought.

            "We've just finished a border patrol," Hazelpaw went on.

            "Now we're going to do battle training in the mossy hollow!" Poppypaw meowed brightly. "You could come with us! He can, can't he?" Poppypaw addressed Brightheart.

            "Not today," Brightheart meowed. Jaypaw felt his heart sink a little bit - he had been caught up in the older apprentice's enthusiasm. "We haven't finished touring the territory yet," Brightheart added to Jaypaw and Poppypaw both.

            "Oh, okay," Poppypaw sounded slightly disappointed. "We'll be able to train together soon enough, Jaypaw! Trust me, training is so much more fun when you're not on your own!"

            "Where are you headed now?" Thornclaw asked his littermate.

            "I'm going to show Jaypaw the ShadowClan border," Brightheart replied.

            Thornclaw paused. "You'll be careful?" He cautioned. "Don't stray over the border markers."

            Jaypaw bristled. They might only have one eye between them, but they weren't idiots! As he prepared to snarl a reply, Brightheart meowed sharply "I know a border marker when I smell it!"

            Jaypaw sensed a flash of reproach come from Dustpelt, and he nudged Thornclaw with his shoulder. "She's a warrior, just like you," he scolded quietly.

            "Of course," Thornclaw apologized, shuffling his paws in embarrassment. "Sorry, Brightheart."

            Brightheart met his apology with stony silence, and Jaypaw felt a prick of satisfaction that he wasn't the only one who felt patronized by the other warriors.

            "There's a steep slope ahead of us," Brightheart warned as they set off. "It's steeper than you might think."

            Jaypaw had already felt it, the ground sloping down beneath his paws.

            "Can you manage it?"

            "Of course I can!" Jaypaw snapped. Angrily, Jaypaw stepped forwards, surprised when the slope suddenly dropped off almost completely and he half-fell, half-skidded his way down the slope, mud pulling at his claws as he tried to slow his descent. He managed to stop when a clump of heather slowed him down, the dry stalks rustling and tugging at his fur.

            "Are you alright?" Brightheart asked, panting as she caught up to him.

            "I'm okay," Jaypaw meowed, giving his chest a few quick licks to hide his embarrassment.

            "We can rest if you want," Brightheart suggested. "That was quite the tumble."

            "No, I'm fine," Jaypaw meowed sharply. He shook the last bits of heather from his pelt. "Which way now?"

            He could feel Brightheart looking at him closely, but ultimately she gave in and turned away, not saying anything more about his fall. "We can head to the border this way." She nosed her way forwards.

            Jaypaw padded after her, furious with himself for losing his footing so easily just when Brightheart had started treating him like a normal apprentice.

            The wind had picked up by the time they reached the border. Jaypaw scented rain on the way, almost masked by the strong, toe-curling scent of the ShadowClan scent markers.

            "We'll walk along here for a bit, then head back to the camp," Brightheart informed him.

            "There must be more to the territory than this!" Jaypaw complained indignantly.

            "Too much to explore today, especially in the rain," Brightheart replied.

            Jaypaw padded along the border behind his mentor crossly. He didn't believe that they couldn't circle the territory in one day. He could sense Brightheart's caution, and knew that she thought that he couldn't cope with a long day out of the camp.

            They headed back into the ThunderClan forest once the rain started, sprinkling down and pattering the soft newleaf leaves above them. Jaypaw lifted his head towards the sky just as a drop made its way down, landing coldly on his nose. He shivered and shook off the wetness. Perhaps it was for the best that they were heading back to the stone hollow. The rain was cold, and the wind that carried it was even colder, blowing sharply through his thin coat. Brightheart's step quickened, and he guessed she felt the same way.

            Then he stiffened, nudging Brightheart to warn her. There was a scent on the wind, sharper than the rain and trees. Memories flooded him of his terrifying dash through the woods. Fox! Another sniff told him that it was the same fox who chased him into the hollow, with the scent of earth and bracken in its pelt. And it was close. He dropped down into a defensive crouch, and Brightheart moved in front of him her fear-scent telling him that she'd scented it as well.

            "We must find Dustpelt's patrol!" She hissed.

            Jaypaw sniffed the air, searching for a scent-trace of the patrol. They were close to the hollow, but Jaypaw had no idea where the mossy training hollow was, and the wind was blowing the fox-scent directly at him now, masking any other smell. With relief, he picked up a small trace of Thornclaw's scent, but it was too late. Realizing that there were two cats in its path, the fox hurtled out of the bushes and charged at them. Jaypaw felt his heart racing with fear, memories of the fox snapping at his tail running through his mind. The fox's paws thudded heavily on the ground, growling deeply. The fox was bigger, and was probably fully grown by now.

            "Run!" Brightheart meowed.

            "I can't leave you!" Jaypaw meowed.

            He heard the clack of teeth as the fox lunged for Brightheart. She hissed, her paws skidding as she dodged. The fox's pained yelp told Jaypaw that she'd caught it with a claw as it had lunged past.

            A rush of air tugged at Jaypaw's fur as it ran past. He twisted, claws unsheathed and prepared to lunge forwards. He swiped at the fox, catching it on its muzzle with a heavy blow. Hot blood spattered his paw, and he recoiled at the reek of it. The fox snapped at him and he dodged out of the way, only to slip on the wet leaf litter and fall to the side, scrambling to stand. The fox lunged for him, but Brightheart screeched in anger, leaping over her apprentice. Jaypaw froze in terror at the sound.

            Then he heard Dustpelt's yowl only rabbit-lengths away. The patrol had come!

            The air filled with battle cries as warriors and apprentices streamed into the clearing, ears flattened and claws unsheathed. The fox let out a fearful bark and raced into the trees, Hazelpaw and Dustpelt chasing after it.

            Jaypaw shook leaf-litter from his fur, scenting the air for blood, trying to make sure Brightheart was alright. Poppypaw hurried over to him.

            "Jaypaw, are you alright?" She asked. He could feel her eyes on him.

            "I'm alright," he meowed.

            "Did the fox hurt you?" Brightheart asked. He was relieved to hear her voice; she wasn't injured.

            "No, I'm fine," he answered her.

            "Don't tell me you tried to fight the fox?" Thornclaw meowed angrily. "You should have run for help!"

            "I couldn't just leave Brightheart alone with it!" He snapped.

            "I agree that he should have left," Brightheart meowed. "But, he gave that fox a good blow that it won't soon forget."

            "Will Dustpelt and Hazelpaw be alright?" Jaypaw asked.

            "They'll probably be able to chase it right over the ShadowClan border," Thornclaw meowed. "We gave it a fright, so I doubt it will turn on them. Even so, they could probably handle it if it did."

            The whole patrol probably say Jaypaw cowering behind Brightheart like a kit. A hot wave of embarrassment flooded through him.

            "We should get Brightheart and Jaypaw back to camp and send a patrol after them," Poppypaw meowed.

            "Good idea," Thornclaw replied.

           

            The rain eased as dusk finally began to fall. Jaypaw lay pressed in a small hollow behind the warriors den, hidden from the rest of the camp. He wasn't sure what to make of the day he'd just had; on one side he believed he'd convinced Brightheart that he was just as capable as any other apprentice, but on the other side, him returning to the camp from his first outing drenched and bruised made the other cats talk. And, with senses as sharp as his, he heard every bit of it.

            Now he just wanted to be alone. He closed his eyes and crouched wearily behind the brambles. He heard his siblings, returned from their day training together, searching for him in the clearing.

            "Where's Jaypaw?" Lionpaw sounded worried.

            Hollypaw answered him from beside the fresh-kill pile. "I haven't seen him, but Brightheart's back. He must be in the camp."

            "Should we go ask her where he is?"

            Jaypaw didn't want Brightheart to tell them about the fox, and what an idiot he imagined he looked like trying to fight it. He slipped out of his hiding spot and met them in front of the fresh-kill pile.

            "There you are!" Hollypaw meowed.

            "Hi," Jaypaw muttered. He sniffed the fresh-kill pile unenthusiastically.

            Hollypaw picked up a sparrow. Lionpaw rooted though the pile and pulled out a shrew. It smelled fresh.

            "I caught this!" Lionpaw meowed proudly.

            "You caught prey on your first day?" Jaypaw meowed, begrudgingly impressed.

            "Well," Lionpaw admitted. "Ashfur spotted it and showed me how to stalk it."

            "Well," Jaypaw grumbled, "Guess you got lucky."

            There was a beat of silence. Hollypaw ran her tail over his shoulders.

            "I heard you ran into trouble," she mewed. "It could happen to anybody."

            "But it happened to _me_." Jaypaw sighed. "I think I'm cursed."

            "It's only your first day," Lionpaw meowed brightly.

            _You caught a shrew your first day,_ Jaypaw thought.

            Hollypaw sniffed at his fur, nosing at one of the various scratches he'd acquired from roaming the forest. "Want to get that looked at?"

            "No," he snapped. "It's fine."

            "Are you going to eat something? This shrew is delicious!" Lionpaw meowed, his mouth full of his first-caught prey.

            "No thanks, I'm not hungry." Jaypaw stood up and turned away. "I just want to sleep."

            "Wait..." Lionpaw began, but Jaypaw was already gloomily padding towards his new den.

            He nosed the front of the den, which was under a densely woven yew bush growing closely to a cleft hidden inside the wall of the hollow. It took him a moment to find his way into the new den. The unfamiliar scents overwhelmed his tired brain - rich moss with all the scents of the different apprentices, tinged with the sharp scent of yew sap. He had no idea what lay around him or where he should sleep.

            "Hey, Jaypaw," Hazelpaw meowed from the back of the den. "There's no one in here but me. Just head towards me; we made nests for you and your siblings over here with some fresh moss."

           "Thank you," Jaypaw sighed. He was far too tired and miserable to make a fuss over being helped, and he appreciated that the apprentices had made them nests already. Gratefully, he padded over to where Hazelpaw directed him, and as he did the scents around him clicked in place, his mental map of the den emerging like a flight of birds settling into a tree.

            He scented Poppypaw's nest, cold but fresh, telling him she'd left not too long ago. Berrypaw's nest was much more stale; he'd clearly not been back to his nest for quite some time, while Honeypaw's nest still smelled warm. Jaypaw weaved his way around and settled down into his new nest.

            "You're welcome," Hazelpaw murmured sleepily. Jaypaw was glad when she sounded too tired to talk. Right now, all he wanted to do was to curl his tail over his nose and sleep.


	10. Chapter 7

"Crouch lower, and don't let your tail trail on the ground," Brightheart whispered, her breath fanning Jaypaw's whiskers.

            "You've said that!" he snapped back.

            It was his fourth day of training and Jaypaw was _determined_ to catch his first piece of prey today. What had been only his second attempt at hunting, starting just before dawn, had turned into a frustratingly long day. Now, the sun was high in the sky and Jaypaw was exhausted. Brightheart was rapidly losing patience with him, urging him to go back to the hollow and try again tomorrow. If Jaypaw was being honest, he'd like nothing more than to just head back to camp and rest, but after his siblings had spent so much time with him the night before, helping him to perfect his hunting crouch and telling him he could do it Jaypaw just couldn't go back home empty-pawed. He'd already lost so many potential catches - Brightheart assured him that it happened to everyone, but he had the distinct feeling that she was lying to make him feel better.

            "Okay. Try again," Brightheart instructed.

            Jaypaw sighed softly, then cast out his senses to the forest around him. He could feel the warm sunlight dappling across his back, a soft breeze rustling the bud-heavy branches above him. A sweet, new-leaf scent was permeating the air, likely from the early-blooming lilac bushes trying to reap all they could from the warm weather. In the distance, a blue jay called, it's cry echoing through the trees. Jaypaw pricked his ears and opened his mouth. Yes! He caught the scent of a sparrow, just a few fox-lengths ahead. He crept forwards, gliding as low and smooth as a snake. He could hear the sparrow now, chirping as it hopped along the forest floor in search of grubs.

            He slunk forwards, making sure he kept his paws light. His tail twitched, and he willed it to be still. The sparrow hadn't noticed him yet. He drew close and... _snap!_

He'd stepped on a twig!

            The bird flapped it's wings and let out a terrified shriek, letting Jaypaw know exactly where it was and exactly how close he'd been to catching it. A bloom of frustrated anger came over him, and with a growl he snapped his head to the side and closed his jaws down onto the bird as it tried to fly past, killing it instantly. He dropped it to the ground.

            "You caught it?" Brightheart gasped.

            "I stepped on a twig," Jaypaw growled. " _Again._ "

            "You plucked the bird right out of the air, and you're worried about the twig?" Brightheart laughed. "That was amazing!"

            Jaypaw, suddenly a bit embarrassed, ducked his head. "I felt the air as it flew towards me," he mumbled. "I didn't actually think I'd catch it."

            "It may have been lucky," Brightheart purred. "But it was your first catch, and that is something worth celebrating! Good job!"

            Jaypaw searched her for any negative feelings, but could only find pride and happiness, tinged slightly with relief. He felt it, too.

            "I want to try the crouch again," Jaypaw meowed.

            "Of course," Brightheart said. "But let's head back to camp for now, you deserve to rest a bit."

            Jaypaw picked up his sparrow, feeling its plump, feathery body warm in his mouth. A flash of pride shot through him, and he raised his head and padded beside his mentor.

            They reached camp with the sun beating down through the trees and into the hollow. The clearing was filled with cats lazing about and soaking up the sunshine. Jaypaw could hear the quiet chatter of all his clanmates as he stepped through the thorn barrier, his catch clutched in his jaws. He was suddenly self-conscious; he and Brightheart had been gone all day and he only had one sparrow to show for it. He paused before emerging into the camp to brace himself.

            "You okay?" Brightheart's mew cut into his thoughts from behind.

            "Fine," he mumbled back, mouth filled with feathers. He entered the camp with a deep breath through his nose.

            "Jaypaw!" he heard his siblings call him from the middle of the clearing. With a rush of paws they scampered over to him. "You're back!"

            "Is that your first catch?" Hollypaw asked.

            "He plucked it out of the air," Brightheart purred, coming up behind him. "It never even saw him coming!"

            Jaypaw ducked his head and pushed past them, carrying the sparrow to the fresh-kill pile while his siblings congratulated him and begged for details from Brightheart. His heart squeezed; he was unsure if he was happy or upset. He fought the feeling that told him his siblings were fake-excited just to patronize him.

            _That's a stupid thought,_ Jaypaw shook his head and dropped the sparrow in the fresh-kill pile. _You know they're happy for you. Stop being so self-involved._

            "That's amazing, Jaypaw!" Hollypaw nuzzled his cheek and purred. Beside her Lionpaw nosed the sparrow.

            "Can we eat it?" Lionpaw asked. "It's still warm!"

            "That's for Jaypaw to decide," a familiar voice sounded. Leafpool padded up, an almost overwhelming feeling of pride rolling off of her. She pushed past his siblings and licked Jaypaw's head lovingly. "It's your first catch, after all!"

            "Uh," Jaypaw turned his sightless eyes towards his aunt. "I don't care who eats it," he meowed uncertainly. "I caught it for the clan."

            "Good answer," Brightheart purred.

            "In that case," Leafpool swished her tail and  bent down to sniff the sparrow. "I'll take it for myself!"

            "Aw..." Lionpaw complained. Jaypaw laughed when he heard his brother's stomach rumble.

            "Come on, Lionpaw," Jaypaw purred. "I smell a rabbit, we can share it between the three of us."

            "Alright!" Lionpaw bent his head and dragged out the snowshoe hare by one of its back paws. The three padded over to the corner of the camp, finding a sunny spot to eat their meal.

            "I wonder if Firestar is going to let us go to the gathering tonight," Hollypaw meowed in between bites.

            "I hope so," Lionpaw sighed.

            "I hope so too," Jaypaw's tail twitched in excitement. "I want to find out what all the leaders are like."

            "Well," Lionpaw swallowed his mouthful, "should we ask him?"

            Hollypaw shifted as she swiveled her head around. Jaypaw flicked his ears, and sniffed the air. Firestar was sharing tongues with Sandstorm at the base of the high ledge.

            "Let's finish eating first," Jaypaw meowed, taking a quick bite.

            "Okay," Lionpaw mewed. Jaypaw could feel his brother's excitement and impatience, tight and trembling, as if it were his own. He chewed slowly, concentrating on the bustle of the camp around him.

            Ferncloud and Dustpelt were chatting idly near the nursery, Icekit and Foxkit tumbling around in a play fight, their laughs and growls echoing off the bare walls of the hollow. The stones lining the camp were all taken up by the snores of dozing cats, and Jaypaw could clearly hear the rusty purrs of Longtail and Mousefur of the best sunny rocks in the camp.

            Near the apprentices den, Poppypaw and her littermates chatted excitedly about their mornings. Poppypaw and Honeypaw both laughed at something Cinderpaw was saying, and their laughs were light and sweet.

            Jaypaw began washing his paws while Lionpaw and Hollypaw finished the hare. His pads were scraped and slightly painful, still not used to the long walks and hunting sessions in the forest. However, he thought with a twinge of pride, he could feel the edges hardening and growing stronger as he rasped his tongue over them. Soon his paw pads would be strong enough that he could walk over sharp stones without feeling it.

            "Okay," Hollypaw's meow broke into his thoughts. "Lionpaw is burying the remains of the rabbit, then we're going to ask Firestar."

            "Right," Jaypaw stood, feeling nervous. "Do you think we'll be able to go?"

            "Well they can't keep us here forever," Hollypaw purred. "We're apprentices now!"

            "Let's go!" Lionpaw meowed as he passed them, paws drumming on the ground.

            Jaypaw and Hollypaw took off after him, skidding to a stop in front of their leader.

            "Hello," Sandstorm purred. "Did you three want something?"

            "We uh," Lionpaw paused.

            "We wanted to know if we were going to the Gathering tonight," Hollypaw inserted.

            "Well," Firestar said, amusement in his meow. "I don't know. Sandstorm, what do you think?"

            "Hmmm," Sandstorm flicked her tail.

            "Oh please let us go!" Lionpaw interrupted.

            Sandstorm and Firestar broke into laughing purrs, and Sandstorm stood and licked Lionpaw on the head tenderly.

            "Of course you three are going," she laughed. "You were all just made apprentices, it would be cruel to keep you from it!"

            "Go get some sleep," Firestar added. "We leave just before Moonhigh."

            "Thank you!" Hollypaw meowed. Sandstorm moved, nuzzling Hollypaw on the top of her head.

            "Of course, my loves," she meowed affectionately. She moved over to Jaypaw and nuzzled his cheek. Jaypaw let out a purr, his grandmother's whiskers brushing comfortably on his own. Her rumbling purr was familiar and he sunk into the memories she gave.

            "Alright you three," Sandstorm turned and lay back down with Firestar. "Leave us old cats alone, you've got too much energy for us!"

            "Alright, thank you!" Hollypaw meowed, turning and bounding off across the camp towards the apprentices den, Lionpaw and Jaypaw following close behind.

            "We're going to the Gathering!" Lionpaw panted excitedly to Poppypaw, Cinderpaw and Honeypaw, who were all surprised to see their den mates run towards them.

            "So am I!" Poppypaw purred, sending a wave of excitement towards Jaypaw.

            "We're not," Cinderpaw sighed, "We're on the pre-dawn patrol."

            "I'll tell you all about it when I get back," Poppypaw promised, standing up and nosing into the den.

            Jaypaw followed her and picked his way towards his nest. Hollypaw curled up beside him and Lionpaw spread out on his other side, squashing him between them.

            "What do we do when we get there?" Hollypaw asked Poppypaw.

            "Chat with the other clan cats!" she purred. "They're usually pretty friendly. Just don't tell them any details about our clan obviously, but you can chat about our clanmates."

            "What if we meet WindClan cats?" Lionpaw fretted. "We're on bad terms with them, right?"

            Poppypaw laughed. "Well, yes, and WindClan might be a bit cold towards us, but they can't do anything at a Gathering. Fighting is forbidden."

            Jaypaw flicked his ears, closing his eyes as the conversation buzzed around him and breathed in deep. He was excited for the Gathering and wanted to ask a hundred questions, but he suppressed it,  knowing he should save his strength for the long walk that night. His muscles ached from his long morning, but the den was warm and cozy and the feeling of his littermates voices rumbling through him soon sent him off to sleep.

***

           Silverpelt glittered overhead in a pitch-black sky as Jaypaw followed the winding pathway upward. He glanced up at the stones lining the trail, as sharp as dog's teeth. Ahead a stream danced swiftly and smoothly down a tower of rounded boulders, cascading down into a brilliantly lit pool. It cast an unnatural blue light, the shadows of unseen cats flitting like ghosts. A cold breeze blew down from the mountains, sending his fur rippling like water. The path beneath his paws felt familiar, as if he'd walked it over and over for years, but it was long, and he wasn't getting any closer...

            Jaypaw flicked his ears, the memory of his dream clinging like cobwebs. Now, the moon had risen and the hollow was cool and the air was light with the scents of spring. The idle chatter of the cats crowded in the middle of the camp drifted like the soft waves lapping at the shore. Jaypaw closed his eyes and turned his face towards the sky, breathing in and out anxiously as he waited for Firestar's signal. Hollypaw trembled beside him and Lionpaw was bouncing and chatting with his mentor, Ashfur, who brushed him off in annoyance.

            Jaypaw smoothed the fur on his forehead down with a paw - Hollypaw had insisted on them all cleaning their pelts thoroughly, so they looked their  best to the other clans. While Jaypaw cared very little of appearances, he liked the downy softness that his pelt gave when it was washed.

            "You three must be so excited," a soft voice behind him sounded. "I remember my first gathering." Their aunt, Leafpool, padded up beside them and nuzzled their cheeks.

            "Auntie!" Hollypaw complained, reaching out with a paw and smoothing Jaypaw's whiskers back down. She then licked her paw and ran it through her own, Leafpool purring in amusement.

            "Don't worry," Leafpool soothed through her laughter. "You all look fantastic."

            Before Hollypaw could reply, Firestar's call sounded across the clearing.

            "This is it!" Lionpaw meowed, jumping in anticipation. The crowd of cat's began to move, and Jaypaw wasted no time in joining them, his littermates and Leafpool right behind him.

            Firestar bounded through the entrance, the rest of ThunderClan following swiftly. Jaypaw felt a thrill run through him as he emerged into the forest, his paws drumming rhythmically through the undergrowth. Poppypaw, just ahead of him, let her tail rest in front of him so he could orient himself easily with his whiskers. Hollypaw's pelt brushed his, spiked in excitement. She let out a purr as Jaypaw charged forwards up the slope, an unspoken challenge.

            They raced past the Sky Oak and down towards the lake. Jaypaw could taste the clean air flowing off the water, and the cold of it stung his nose. The pebbles clattered beneath his paws as they reached the shore, and Jaypaw shoved the worry of tripping to the back of his mind, feeling the gaze of Leafpool on his back. The sharp stones grazed his sore paws, but in his excitement Jaypaw didn't care. He could already scent heather and hares as they approached WindClan territory.

            As the cat's began the long trek through WindClan's territory, Firestar steadied the pace and slowed it to a trot. Jaypaw was panting, and was glad for the slower pace. They passed the horse-place where Daisy used to live, the heavy and dusty scent of horses causing Jaypaw to sneeze. Their large hoofed paws thrummed on the ground, and Jaypaw pictured them from the stories Daisy used to tell them.

            Hollypaw pushed him forwards, and they crossed over into RiverClan territory, their scent markers strong. The ground beneath Jaypaw's paws began to squelch and sink, muddy as they drew closer to the island. Jaypaw flicked his ear back - WindClan was arriving just behind them. He could hear the chatter of cats on the island past the lapping waves of the lake. ShadowClan and RiverClan scents mingled together, and Jaypaw concentrated his hearing, trying to pick up conversations on the island.

            "Will you mention the border markers?" Jaypaw heard Brackenfur, keeping pace with Firestar at the head of the party, say.

            "You mean the fact that WindClan and ShadowClan have both marked every blade of grass their side of the border?" Firestar asked.

            "Yes," Brackenfur replied.

            "I cannot dictate what other clans do their side of the border," Firestar reminded him.

            "But it's an open show of hostility!" Brambleflower pitched in, hurrying up to meet them.

            "We are not going to react," Firestar decided, "Yet."

            "We should send out more frequent border patrols, then," Brackenfur mused. "That would be better than letting the other clans know they've got us worried."

            "It takes more than the stench of ShadowClan and WindClan to scare us!" Firestar declared. He broke into a run, bounding the last few tail-lengths to the fallen tree, and skidded to a halt, the withered roots clattering together.

            Jaypaw hurried forwards as well, the voices of the WindClan warriors growing louder and louder behind them.

            "Do you suppose the stories Ferncloud told us about ShadowClan are true?" Lionpaw asked, his pelt brushing Jaypaw's as he joined him.

            "You don't actually believe they let their elders starve, do you?" Jaypaw teased.

            "Well, no," Lionpaw murmured, "but what if all the other apprentices are bigger than us?"

            "We've only just become apprentices," Hollypaw pointed out. "There's ought to be _some_ apprentices bigger than us."

            Firestar leapt onto the fallen tree trunk, picked his way across to the far shore, and jumped down. Jaypaw swallowed nervously.

            When it was his turn, Jaypaw shivered. He reached up with his forepaws and felt along the roots, trying to gauge the distance with his paws.

            "Here," Poppypaw pushed gently past him and jumped onto the trunk. "It's a tail-length high."

            Jaypaw nodded, feeling his littermates watching him with tense nervousness. He scented the air and tensed up his muscles. After a moment of hesitation, he leapt up, landing onto the trunk beside Poppypaw. His forepaws slid out from under him, and the shock sent a horrible jolt of fear through him. Poppypaw steadied him as he dug his claws in and righted himself, his tail lashing wildly behind him.

            "Thanks," he gasped.

            "It's tricky the first time," Poppypaw murmured. "Honeypaw showed up to her first gathering soaking wet."

            Jaypaw purred in amusement and the two of them picked their way across the log. The trunk tilted slightly as Hollypaw followed him on. Poppypaw leapt down in front of him and gave a soft trill of warning, letting him know the distance. He jumped off after her, landing a little clumsily in the soft sand, but quickly righted himself and stood straight. He felt the relief rolling off his littermates, and swallowed his indignation.

            "C'mon slow pokes!" He joked instead to his siblings as they picked their way slowly across the log. Jaypaw longed to start exploring the edge of the island, but he forced himself to wait for the rest of ThunderClan to cross the tree bridge.

            Finally, all the ThunderClan cats stood on the beach. Firestar turned and pushed his way through the bracken, and Jaypaw started forwards, his littermates bounding ahead while he slowly tested the ground in front of him.

            "It's alright," Leafpool murmured from behind him. "The undergrowth isn't thick, go ahead."

            Jaypaw nodded and, limbs trembling in anxiety, he  trotted forwards, slipping past a sharp-scented pine tree and into the clearing.

            The overwhelming scent and sounds of cats hit him hard across the face like a powerful gust of wind. He blinked hard and scrunched up his nose, trying to discern all of the different stimuli that were attacking his senses. He could scent RiverClan and ShadowClan, not mingled close together but rather keeping to their own sides of the clearing and only talking a few tail-lengths away from each other. He heard Poppypaw jog forwards to meet with a RiverClan apprentice, their purrs and joy at seeing each other making their friendship obvious. The scent of WindClan blew in from behind him as the fourth clan arrived onto the island. Jaypaw shook his head.

            "There are so many cats!" Lionpaw meowed as Jaypaw trotted up to meet him.

            "Look at him," Hollypaw flicked her tail. "He looks strong!"

            "Imagine meeting him in battle," Lionpaw added. "I'm going to train twice as hard from now on!"

            Jaypaw flicked an ear, having no idea who they were talking about. Leafpool brushed his back with her tail and leaned in close.

            "Jaypaw, can you come with me?" She asked. "There's someone I'd like you to meet."

            "Them too?" Jaypaw pointed his nose at his siblings, who were bickering about who would beat who in a fight.

            "Yes, but later," Leafpool laughed. "They seem busy."

            She turned and padded away, weaving through the throng of cats. Jaypaw hurried after her, following her scent. They reached the RiverClan cats, and Jaypaw felt a spike of curiosity run through him. Leafpool stopped and gave a quiet purr, joy and love flowing from her. Jaypaw pricked his ears in surprise - what RiverClan cat did Leafpool have such strong feelings for?

            "Mothwing!" She purred.

            "Oh, Leafpool! I missed you!" came the responding mew, deep and feminine and smooth like honey. It rumbled soothingly to him, like a warm tongue rasping over sore muscles. Jaypaw blinked; something about the voice was familiar and comforting, but he just could not place it.

            "Jaypaw, this is your, uh, Aunt Mothwing, Brambleflower's sister," Leafpool brushed her tail encouragingly over his shoulders. He stepped forwards.

            "Hi..." he swallowed, his voice coming out as a squeak. "I've heard a lot about you," he added, keeping his voice steady.

            "And I, you," Mothwing replied, leaning forwards and licking his head tenderly. Her immense fluff tickled his nose, much like his father's. She was tall like him, too, having to bend down to reach Jaypaw's head. She moved back and gazed at him. "I came to visit you when you were just a small kit. You've grown so much!" He felt a wave of love and pride sweep over him. He wondered how good a friend Mothwing had been to his family to make her feel like that. He blinked up at her.

            "Your eyes..." Mothing murmured, surprise lacing her voice.

            "Yes, I know," Jaypaw grumbled, shifting his paws. "I'm blind."

            "No, it's not that..." she answered, her voice soft. "Leafpool, you never told me his eyes were blue!"

            "What does that matter?" Jaypaw laughed awkwardly. He ducked his head. Was blue bad?

            "No... no you're right, it doesn't," Mothing quickly amended, though Jaypaw could feel that it clearly meant more to her than she let on.

            A commanding meow sounded from the Great Oak, inturrupting whatever conversation would have taken place next.

            "We gather here beneath the light of silverpelt and the full moon, commanded by-" A female meow, likely the RiverClan leader Leopardstar, was interrupted by a rasping, foul-tempered shout.

            "Shut up with that," it said. "We don't need to go through this spiel _every time_!"

            "Oh come on, Onestar," Firestar's voice sounded. "Let's begin the Gathering."

            "Yes, right," Onestar rasped. Jaypaw was sure that he was very old, as his voice was achingly worn, and if he concentrated, he could just make out the sour stink rolling off of him.

            "First things first, my deputy Ashfoot has retired to the elder's den," he meowed. Chattering broke out among the cats around Jaypaw.

            "I'm not surprised," Mothwing whispered to him and Leafpool. "Crowfeather said she was getting bad aches in her paws."

            "Yes, she's nearly as old as Onestar himself," Leafpool murmured. "We should ask Crowfeather how she's doing."

            Jaypaw blinked. He hadn't realized just how well the medicine cats got along; he'd heard from his mother and father, who had gone on the great journey to find the lake with Crowfeather, that he was an ornery cat and was hard to get along with. It seemed like Leafpool and Mothwing had a bond with the other medicine cats that was almost like the bond between clanmates.

            "My new deputy is Whitetail," Onestar announced. There were cheers from the crowd, calling out Whitetail's name. "Besides that," Onestar continued, "Green-leaf has been good to us this past moon. The rabbits are running, but not too fast. As well, the windy weather has made it difficult for hawks and vultures to hunt, which means more prey for us." Jaypaw heard a rustle up in the tree as Onestar moved back.

            "ShadowClan has a new apprentice," Blackstar anounced, his voice deep and loud. "Ivypaw." There were shouting and calls for her name. Jaypaw felt unbidden joy from a source within the ShadowClan ranks - likely the new apprentice.

            Jaypaw was suddenly struck by a thought that made anxiety race through him. Was Firestar going to call his name? What would he do then? Was he supposed to do something? Nobody told him!

            "Don't worry," Mothwing flicked his side with her long, fluffy tail. "All you have to do is sit. Calling your name is a formality."

            Jaypaw breathed a sigh of relief as Blackstar continued to speak.

           "Hunting has been good for ShadowClan ever since we enlarged our territory," Blackstar meowed, a direct jab at Firestar and the two-leg-ridden site he'd given up. Jaypaw's fur bristled.

            "Our new stretch of territory is a great source of prey," Blackstar said.

            _Liar!_ Jaypaw thought, narrowing his eyes.

            "My father would never have given it up if it were," Leafpool muttered under her breath.

            "ShadowClan would like to thank Firestar for his generosity in giving it to us," Blackstar finished with poisonous gratitude.

            "I am pleased to hear that ShadowClan is so much out of a piece of land prey-poor by ThunderClan standards," Firestar said back, his voice smooth. A wave of subdued approval rippled through the ThunderClan cats.

            "ThunderClan are fortunate to have more than _one_ " -he lingered over that word- "new apprentice this moon. Hollypaw, Lionpaw, and Jaypaw."

            Jaypaw ducked his head as cats cheered his name. Leafpool pushed his shoulder gently, and he straightened up.

            "We have been lucky this Leaf-Bare, and now that Green-Leaf is upon us, the snow and frost are quickly dying away and the hunting is good."

            Jaypaw's head snapped towards the tree-bridge. Two cats were crossing it! He could smell them and hear their hushed whispers, and if he concentrated he could just make out the trepidation and excitement running through them.

            A rustling sounded in the corner of the island, cats quickly quieting and staring at the source of the noise. Jaypaw heard two cats pad out into the clearing.

            "Intruders!" The alarm made all the cats in the area bristle in alarm. The warriors closest to the strangers hissed and growled, wrestling the two easily to the ground.

            "Stop!" Firestar's voice sounded. Jaypaw could feel pure shock and disbelief sparking through his leader's pelt. The warriors froze and drew back.

            In a voice that was taught in shock and disbelief, Firestar spoke a name that Jaypaw had only heard in nursery stories.

            "Greystripe?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your patience! I hope this chapter was worth the wait ^^  
> As well, thank you to those especially who spent some time to leave a lovely comment!! I can't reply to them all but know that I read them and adore them <3! I'll try to be better about responding!
> 
> Also, here is my inspiration for Jay's catch https://www.iizcat.com/post/4044/Blind-cat-surprises-human-with-his-excellent-hunting-skills  
> Blind cats are amazing!
> 
> Thank you again!


	11. Chapter 8

Hollypaw stared in amazement, her green eyes wide. Greystripe?

            "Didn't he die?" Hollypaw hissed to Lionpaw. He didn't reply, too busy trying to balance on his hind legs to get a better view.

            Hollypaw ducked her head and pushed her way through the crowd of cats, wiggling and poking her head between Spiderleg and Ashfur.

            A large grey tom with his fur all matted and ragged, clinging to tight muscles and jutting bone stood in front of their leader. White fur speckled his face, claiming his age, and his whiskers were long and crooked. His spine and ribs were visible beneath his dull pelt, but his head was held high and proud. Beside him, a skinny black and grey she-cat shivered, her round face filthy and scarred, her right ear missing a chunk of flesh, the skin around it still scabbed and healing. Her short pelt was missing clumps of fur, and her tail was covered in burrs and other debris. The scent of crow-food hung lightly in the air around them, causing Hollypaw to scrunch up her nose.

            _It must be him,_ she thought, her pelt spiking. _But he's dead!_

"You're alive!" Firestar gasped, rushing towards his old friend. The two embraced, Firestar's short stature becoming absolutely dwarfed in Greystripe's large body.

            "Firestar," came Greystripe's choked reply. In front of them, Onestar and Blackstar stood with their pelts bristling and their eyes round and shocked. Blackstar's pale blue eyes narrowed at Greystripe's companion, whose eyes were bright with fear and pupils blown wide as she tried to watch every cat at once.

            "Easy now, Millie," Greystripe cautioned, sweeping his tail over his companion.

            "How did you escape the Twolegs?" Firestar asked, taking a step back. His eyes were misty and wide.

            "I had help," Greystripe ducked his head, looking back at the she-cat. "Millie helped me escape."

            "A _kittypet_ made the journey with you?" Squirrelflight asked incredulously.

            "I wouldn't have managed it alone," Greystripe raised his head.

             Brackenfur stepped forwards, tilting his head. "How did you find us? Did you follow our trail?"

            "No," Greystripe shook his head. "We found our own way... somehow."

            "We searched Greystripe's forest first," Millie added. Her voice was rough and hard, so unlike the soft meow of Daisy.

            "The whole forest was devastated," Greystripe sighed. "I don't blame you for not waiting for me."

            "I couldn't," Firestar whispered, closing his eyes and dipping his head. "So many cats had already died. We couldn't stay. I would have, if it was just my life on the line." His voice grew quiet at the end.

            "I know," Greystripe murmured.

            "How did you know which way we had gone?" Brambleflower asked, brushing up beside Brackenfur.

            "We spoke with Ravenpaw, he pointed us your way," Greystripe said.

            "Ravenpaw?" Firestar's eyes glowed. "How was he?"

            "He was well, he and Barely managed to stay safe from all the Twoleg activity."

            "I'm glad," Sandstorm purred and pushed her way over to her old friend. "Thank StarClan you found us, you must be exhausted."

            "Welcome back Greystripe," Leopardstar pushed past Onestar and Blackstar, who glared at her.

            "Thank StarClan he found us!"

            "How did he ever find us?"

            "Welcome back!"

            Cats from all four clans surged forwards, purring loudly to greet the old warrior back home. Greystripe laughed joyfully, his purr rumbling the loudest. His companion, Millie, shied back and avoided the other cats, her fur bristling in anxiety.

            Hollypaw watched in disbelief, her tail twitching in confusion. She knew there was a truce at the Gathering, but surely this was not how it was supposed to be! There were four clans, and yet the cats here were acting as if they all belonged to one. She wriggled back to Lionpaw.

            "This can't be natural," she hissed to him, narrowing her eyes. "Greystripe is ThunderClan, why are all the other cats making such a fuss over him?"

            "I dunno," Lionpaw shrugged.

            "I thought being a warrior meant protecting your clan," Hollypaw meowed. "Shouldn't the other clans be worried that we have another warrior?"

            "This is like Ferncloud's stories of the Great Journey," Poppypaw meowed excitedly, her odd-coloured eyes shining as she pushed her way towards them.

            "But the Great Journey is over," Hollypaw pointed out.

            Poppypaw wasn't listening; her ears were perked, listening to the purrs and excited chattering of Greystripe and the other clan cats rumbling like thunder through the clearing. "I wonder how he knew we were on the island," she meowed.

            "Do you think StarClan guided him?" Lionpaw asked.

            "How did you know we were here?" An old but beautiful grey she-cat asked.

            "Mistyfoot," Greystripe purred, greeting the RiverClan deputy. "Good to see you again! We met a rogue near the thunderpath who warned us about the cats living by the lake," he explained. "When we reached the top of the ridge, the moon was shining so brightly that we could see shapes moving towards the island."

            "After that, we followed the freshest scents," Millie added. "They led us to the fallen tree."

            Hollypaw heard a hiss of disgust. Onestar was staring directly at Millie in open malice, his eyes narrowed and his lip curled. Millie raised her pale green eyes, meeting Onestar's icy yellow gaze with her own defiantly. Onestar flicked his tail and looked away, running his tongue over his mouth full of rotten teeth. Millie raised her head triumphantly; Hollypaw was impressed.

            Greystripe saw this and his neck-fur bristled.

            "Let's not forget the truce," Leopardstar hissed to Onestar.

            "The truce is for _warriors!_ " Onestar hissed back.

            "The _Gathering_ is for warriors," Blackstar added.

            Murmurs of agreement passed through the WindClan and ShadowClan cats.

            "Is ThunderClan going to allow _another_ kittypet to join their ranks?" Onestar griped.

            "I have trained Millie as a warrior," Greystripe argued. "Only a true warrior would have been able to make the journey!" His mew broke off into a rusty cough.

            "Are you alright?" Leafpool asked, approaching with Jaypaw at her side. Hollypaw saw her brother's ears prick in interest, his deep blue eyes narrowed in concentration.

            "Just tired," Greystripe assured her.

            "Let's get you home," Firestar meowed.

            "Can you travel a bit more tonight?" Greystripe turned to Millie and asked.

            "I'll keep going as long as you need," Millie assured him.

            "Alright," Firestar turned to the other leaders. "Was there any other news to be shared?"

            "Nothing from RiverClan," Leopardstar meowed.

            "No." Onestar huffed.

            Blackstar shook his head.

            "Then let us return," Firestar called to the rest of ThunderClan, "and show Greystripe and Millie their new home."

            "Does this mean ThunderClan has _two_ deputies?" Ashfur called boldly.

            "A matter for another time," Firestar meowed. "Lead the way, Brackenfur."

            The ginger tom nodded and hurried across the fallen tree, the rest of ThunderClan following swiftly behind him.

            Sandstorm wove around Millie. "Stay close to me," she meowed. "We'll have a nice, warm den for you when we get back."

            Millie nodded, limping slightly. Greystripe brushed his pelt with hers.

            Jaypaw hurried to meet his siblings and Poppypaw as they left, acutely aware of the other clans watching them go. A beautiful white and ginger tabby blinked warmly at Jaypaw as he passed, letting out a fond purr of farewell, which he acknowledged with a polite nod.

            "Who was that?" Hollypaw asked, surprised.

            "Mothwing," Jaypaw answered, still concentrating on Greystripe and Millie. "RiverClan medicine cat."

            "She seemed fond of you," Hollypaw pushed.

            "Friend of Leafpool's I guess," Jaypaw answered distractedly.

            Hollypaw dropped the subject with a shrug.

            "Surely Firestar will restore Greystripe to deputy?" Someone from behind Hollypaw asked.

            "The vigil was _false,_ " another piped up.

            Rage flared in Hollypaw, but not enough to whisk away the dread prickling her pelt. Had Brambleflower been appointed deputy by _mistake?_ What did that mean for Brackenfur? She pushed the thought away, ignoring the gossiping from the other clans.

            She pushed herself across the fallen tree, following Jaypaw closely as Poppypaw kept her eye on him to make sure he didn't fall. Hollypaw leapt down after him, Lionpaw waiting as well with eyes shining in excitement.

            "I hope every Gathering is as eventful as that one was!" Lionpaw meowed. "Imagine Greystripe finding us!"

            "How do you suppose next time one-up's tonight?" Jaypaw laughed. "Onestar grows an extra head?"

            "I thought Greystripe finding us was just as impossible," Lionpaw meowed. "So... it could happen!"

            "You aren't worried?" Hollypaw hissed, irritated.

            "What about?" Lionpaw asked.

            "Greystripe being back of course!" Hollypaw flicked her tail. "How can StarClan approve of Brackenfur being deputy when Greystripe was alive all this time?"

            "StarClan didn't tell us he was alive," Jaypaw shrugged. "If it was so important to them they would have said."

            I think Brackenfur is a great deputy," Poppypaw added. "And not just because he's my father."

            "Firestar can't ignore that," Jaypaw agreed.

            "But what about the warrior code?" Hollypaw protested.

            "What about it? There's no rule that involves a cat coming back from the dead," Jaypaw rolled his eyes.

           Hollypaw shook her head; no-one had even mentioned the warrior code at the Gathering. And yet, she could not shake the feeling that some rule had been broken when Brambleflower was appointed deputy, and then Brackenfur after him, when the old one still technically held the position.

            "But Greystripe was deputy first," Hollypaw meowed, half to herself.

            "Do you _want_ Brackenfur to be replaced?" Lionpaw asked.

            "Of course not, Brackenfur is a great deputy!" Hollypaw snapped.

            "The clan is fine as it is," Jaypaw meowed. "So why bother changing anything?"

            Hollypaw looked up ahead at Sandstorm and Millie. The two she-cats were padding along the edge of the lake, their paws leaving dappled prints in the damp sand. Greystripe and Firestar walked beside them, and behind, the rest of the clan whispered quietly among themselves, and Hollypaw guessed that they were just as uncertain as she was as to what was going to happen now that Greystripe was back in the clan.

***

            The pale light of a watery dawn was just seeping over the horizon as Hollypaw and the rest of the ThunderClan cats crested the ridge towards the camp. The excited whispering, which had buzzed around the cats like a swarm of bees ceased and quieted as they entered the tunnel into the hollow. The clearing was bathed in long shadows, the inky blackness of night still holding the forest in its clutches. Hollypaw's pelt prickled with anticipation as cats began to rise from the shadows, slipping close with tails held high as they greeted their fellow clanmates.

            "How was the Gathering?" Cinderpaw called.

            Firestar halted, Greystripe beside him. "Has the pre-dawn patrol already left?"

            "You just missed them," Cinderpaw nodded.

            "So lively," Greystripe purred. "I remember us having that much energy, when we were younger."

            "Who are you?" Cinderpaw's leaf-green eyes grew round as she stared at the warrior.

            "He was ThunderClan's deputy before you were born," Firestar meowed.

            "Greystripe?" Cinderpaw guessed.

            "Greystripe!" Poppypaw purred, her tail fluffed up as she circled her littermate.

            "Can I tell Cloudtail?" Cinderpaw's voice rose excitedly. "Oh, please?" Without waiting for an answer, she charged off towards the warrior's den, calling her mentor's name.

            Cloudtail appeared at the den-entrance, his sleep-ruffled fur glowing in the moonlight. "What's the matter Cinderpaw?" He complained.

            "Greystripe is back!"

            Brightheart pushed past her mate, her one eye wide with disbelief. "Greystripe?" She stared, then rushed forwards to greet her old friend.  

            "Greystripe is back!" Cloudtail yowled. Soon, meows of shock and joy were erupting from the old warriors as they ran towards their lost clanmate, greeting him back home for the first time in a very long time.

            "I thought I'd never see you again," Dustpelt rasped, touching muzzles lightly with his old friend.

            "Firestar was right," Stormfur added. "He never gave up on you, not once. He always said you'd return."

            Greystripe stared at Stormfur - his son in astonishment. "Do you live in ThunderClan now?"

            "What's all this noise?" Mousefur's grumpy mew sounded as the old she-cat limped stiffly from the tangled entrance of the den, Longtail behind her.

            Longtail lifted his nose and sniffed the air, his blind eyes squeezed shut. Even in the dim light of the moon, Hollypaw could see the fur prick along his spine. "Is that Greystripe?"

            "You're dreaming," Mousefur scoffed.

            "Greystripe pushed himself towards the elder, slipping out from the throng of cats. "It's really me," he meowed. "I'm home."

            "Greystripe!" Mousefur hurried forwards to touch his muzzle. "How did you ever find us?"

            Sandstorm stepped forwards. "That is a long story for another night," she meowed softly. "Greystripe and Millie are exhausted."

            "Millie?" Mousefur asked, glancing at the stranger who stood behind Greystripe.

            "Millie helped me make the journey here," Greystripe meowed. "She's my mate now."

            Mousefur narrowed her eyes, and Hollypaw's belly tightened with anxiety. How would the crotchety elder react? Warriors were not supposed to take mates from outside the clan, or at the very least were not supposed to then take them back to their clan.

            "You have a type, Greystripe," Mousefur scoffed. "Always breaking the rules."

            Hollypaw flicked the tip of her tail uneasily. The clan seemed willing to trust and take in Millie, but she wasn't so sure. Could they trust an outsider to give her all to a clan she wasn't born in? What did StarClan think about accepting another outsider? She glanced at Firestar. Perhaps having a leader with kittypet roots made it alright. The most important thing was that Millie had the potential to better their clan, and had helped Greystripe find his way home.

            Hollypaw shook her head and padded to join her littermates, who were gossiping with the rest of the apprentices, crowded close to their den's entrance.

            "Greystripe's not as big as I'd imagined," Cinderpaw whispered. "He looks small next to Brambleflower."

            "He smells of crow-food," Berrypaw pitched in.

            "He must have been eating like a rogue for moons," Lionpaw pointed out. "He'll look bigger once he eats like a true warrior."

            "What happens now? Who will be deputy?" Mousepaw glanced uneasily at Brackenfur, who was helping to clear out an unused den to temporarily house their new clanmates.

            "I don't know," Honeypaw breathed, peeking over at Firestar.

            "Cinderpaw, come help me move these brambles!" Cloudtail called, motioning with his tail towards the new make-shift den.

            "Coming!" Cinderpaw leaped over Jaypaw and barreled over to her mentor.

            "Jaypaw, take Lionpaw and fetch some moss, will you?" Brightheart called. "There should be some already dry in the Medicine Den."

            "Sure," Jaypaw stood and he and Lionpaw trotted off.

            "Can I do anything to help?" Hollypaw asked, padding over to Sorreltail.

            "Sorry, Hollypaw," Sorreltail apologized, "there are too many paws working on the den wall already."

            "Oh, alright," Hollypaw shrugged, slightly disappointed. She peeked over at Greystripe and Millie, who were tiredly washing their fur with the help of their old clanmates. Firestar and Greystripe were pressed close together, meowing very softly between them. Even though Firestar was battle-worn and Greystripe's face was turning white, the two tom's eyes were glowing with youthful joy and pure love. Hollypaw had never seen her grandfather so happy.

            Firestar caught her eye and waved her over with his tail. She timidly approached, shy under Greystripe's amber gaze.

            "This is Hollypaw, my granddaughter. One of Brambleflower and Squirrelflight's kits."

            "Hello," Hollypaw dipped her head politely.

            "You have Firestar's eyes," Greystripe purred. "It's good to meet you, Hollypaw."

            "It's good to meet you, too," Hollypaw replied.

            Greystripe let out a deep, rumbling laugh. "Such manners! You take after your aunt Leafpool!"

            "Hey!" Leafpool overheard this, placing the bundle of herbs she was carrying gently on the ground. "You say that like it's a bad thing!"

            "Sorry," Greystripe ducked his head. Hollypaw's heart warmed - she liked the old tom. But worry still gnawed at the back of her mind. What would happen to the clan now that he returned? She flicked her gaze over to Millie, who dozed quietly under the rasping tongue of Sandstorm.

            "The den's finished!" Cloudtail called. The pinkish light of dawn was beginning to wash over the camp, and the early patrol was already gathering at the tunnel.

            "Perfect," Leafpool purred. "Get some rest, you two. You need it." She turned to Hollypaw, her eyes glowing warmly. "You too, you must be tired."

            "A little," Hollypaw admitted. She dipped her head in polite farewell and joined her brothers at the apprentices den. Lionpaw was watching Greystripe with curious eyes.

            "What's he like?" Jaypaw asked, his sightless eyes trained on her.

            "Nice," Hollypaw shrugged. "Very friendly. Like the stories." She brushed past them and climbed into the den, sinking down into her mossy nest.

            "I wonder how many of them are true," Jaypaw pondered, sinking down next to her and closing his eyes.

            Hollypaw purred in response, her mind racing with all the rules in the Warrior Code. Whatever, _whomever_ Firestar chose would determine the future of ThunderClan for moons to come.


	12. Chapter 9

            A brilliant moon shone overhead, as once more Jaypaw walked up the familiar path. His paws slipped easily into grooves made by long ago cats, and he could hear them whispering. He glanced around, friendly scents flitting around him and rustling the long grasses that lines the mossy path. He purred, his steps quickening, anticipation making his tail twitch. Suddenly, a snap sounded loudly behind him, and the forest fell deathly silent.

            He looked back, his pelt beginning to bristle. The trees behind him were silent, and the shadows that had seemed so welcoming before were now foreboding. His heart was racing; he held his breath. The path was cold beneath his paws.

            A shadow moved in the trees, and two white eyes reflected the moon back at him. A tall figure, with pointed ears reaching high on its head, stepped out of the forest. A growl emitted from the creature's throat, and it bared its long fangs...

           Jaypaw blinked, a shudder wracking through him. The memory of that dream, like the ones before, clung to the back of his mind. However, this one was different. He'd had that dream a hundred times, walking up the path towards a sparkling pool, but he had never seen that creature before. He'd been relieved when he'd woken up to the familiar blindness of the waking world. The fear he'd felt in the dream continued to haunt him throughout the day, even now as the sun began its descent.

            "Jaypaw, are you even listening to me?" Brightheart's voice snapped him out of his thoughts, and he huffed grumpily.

            "Maybe if this lesson wasn't so _boring_ my mind wouldn't wander off so much!" Jaypaw bit out. "While Lionpaw and Hollypaw are out learning something useful, I'm here memorizing herbs! I don't understand why I have to learn all the names of these plants. I'm training to be a warrior, not a medicine cat!" His nose was clogged with the sharp scent of all the herbs, and his mouth had a nasty flavour to it from the few that Brightheart had made him taste.

            His mentor let out an exasperated sigh. "Jaypaw, for the hundredth time, learning about herbs and what they do is incredibly important! There may come a time when you have to patch up a wound or heal a cat when there is no medicine cat around. If you go on a quest, for example."

            "Like the one mom and dad went on?" Jaypaw asked, listening more intently.

            "Exactly. If Crowfeather hadn't been with them, Tawnypelt would have died of infection long before they reached the end of their journey. None of the other warriors knew anything about herbs."

            Jaypaw let out a relenting sigh. "Alright, alright. I guess it _would_ be nice to learn something that other warrior apprentices don't learn."

            "Exactly," Brightheart purred, relieved. "Now, go over them one more time for me, please."

            Jaypaw snorted and dipped his head to the piles of herbs he'd been learning. "This one is horsetail, beside it is juniper, then goldenrod, watermint, catnip and marigold." He pointed to each with his paw as he listed them off.

            "Alright, and what do they do?"

            "Horsetail helps with infection, juniper berries help with breathing troubles, goldenrod quickens blood clotting and aids in wound healing, watermint is for nausea, catnip cures greencough and marigold prevents infection." He huffed, out of breath.

            "Very good!" Brightheart praised. "Juniper berries also help with bellyache if you eat it."

            "Right, forgot about that," Jaypaw bent his head and sniffed the juniper berries. "Is it better or worse than watermint?"

            "About the same, but you shouldn't mix the two," Leafpool meowed, ducking in through the entrance. "Too many herbs can be harsh on an upset stomach."

            "Okay," Jaypaw ran his paw over his nose to try and get rid of the stinging, sharp sensation from all the overwhelming scents.

            "Have you learned all of these?" Leafpool asked, bending down to observe the piles of herbs Brightheart had laid out.

            "Yeah, more or less," Jaypaw shrugged.

            "He's picked it up very quickly," Brightheart meowed.

            "Your memory is very good," Leafpool purred. "You'd make a fine medicine cat!"

            "I'm going to be a _warrior!_ " Jaypaw hissed.

            "I'm kidding I'm kidding!" Leafpool laughed, nuzzling his shoulder. Jaypaw grumbled, hiding his embarrassment at her praise.

            "Are you going to the Moonpool tonight?" Brightheart asked.

            "Yes, just preparing to leave now. Can you put the herbs back, please?" Leafpool trotted past them, checking her stores quickly.

            "Of course." Brightheart meowed. After Leafpool had left the den, she turned to her apprentice and mewed "Jaypaw, I'll clean up here if you go and fetch moss for Greystripe and Millie's nest. I'm sure it could use a good cleaning."

            "Alright," Jaypaw meowed, his ears pricked with interest. _The Moonpool!_ he thought, slipping out of the den and into the camp. _Maybe StarClan has an answer for my strange dreams._ His mind was buzzing, and his paws were eager to explore. If Leafpool was headed for the Moonpool, he was going to follow her.

            Jaypaw sniffed the air and began to head for the entrance.

            "Where are you going, Jaypaw?" A voice had him stop, and he recognized the raspy mew of Ferncloud.

            "Fetching moss," he meowed, turning his face in her direction. "I'm supposed to clean Greystripe and Millie's nest."

            "Oh good, they could use it," she purred. He heard her stand and stretch before making her way over to him. She ran her tongue over his head lovingly. "Can you and your littermates eat with me and the kits tonight? We all miss you," she meowed.

            Jaypaw felt a tug of guilt pull at his heart. He, Hollypaw and Lionpaw had all been so focused on their training that they'd neglected to spend time with anyone else.

            "Of course, Ferncloud," Jaypaw's mew was small, and he nuzzled her cheek fondly. If he was to go to the Moonpool tonight, there was no way he would make it back in time to eat with his nursery-family before he had to start tomorrow's training, but he made a mental note to tell his siblings to visit with her, Foxkit, and Icekit more often.

            "Alright," Ferncloud's purr was deep and rumbling. She turned and padded away. "Remember to check for thorns in the bedding!"

            "Yes, Ferncloud," Jaypaw meowed, rolling his eyes and bounding out of the camp. _I'll make it up to you, I promise,_ he added in his head, the forest floor flying beneath his paws as he veered away from the main path.

            He stopped once he was far enough away from the camp entrance. He sniffed the air, his mouth open, and quickly picked up Leafpool's scent. He slunk forwards until he was in her path, and hid in the long grass. A moment later, Leafpool came pattering over the forest floor, kicking up leaves and debris with her paws as she hurried past. The sun was setting quickly; Jaypaw could taste the dewy nigh air and feel the long, cold shadows across his pelt.

            He let her pass, then snuck after her, keeping off the path she was using so she wouldn't spot him. The trees were a good shield, and he wove through them seamlessly, using his instinct more than his whiskers. After a while, the scent of WindClan began to taint the air, and he ducked down. The border was approaching, and Jaypaw could already hear the voices of the other medicine cats.

            He waited, his ears pricked, picking up only snippets of the conversations. He recognized Mothwing's honey purr, and Crowfeather's raspy complaints as the party moved up the slope towards the Moonpool, following the stream.

            After a few moments, when they were well out of earshot, Jaypaw began to climb the slope after them, their scents hanging heavy in the air. The rocks beneath his paws rose and fell unevenly, and he felt along slowly, frustration building with each stumble.

            Suddenly, he began to recognize the path, paws slipping into the grooves of his dreams. He was trekking through the same valley that he visited in his sleep, and he pictured it perfectly in his mind. Ahead, he could just hear the waterfall that he knew was there, glistening in the light of the rising moon. He realized then that his dreams were guiding him to the Moonpool.

            _StarClan_ must _have sent them, then_ , Jaypaw thought excitedly. He quickened his pace, scrabbling up the rocks and grazing his paw pads on the sharp stones. He stopped, out of breath, at the top. He was at the brink of a hollow, and he could see the pool in his mind's eye. The medicine cats' scents drifted up, mingled with the damp scents of rock, lichen, and fresh water with the sharp, crisp scents of the mountains. It trickled and splashed, echoing off the encircling stone.

            As he padded cautiously forwards, he noticed how chill the air was, and how normal he felt. There was no feeling of coming home or belonging, and the air was silent. He could hear the water running, birds and prey rusting and chirping in the forest, but there were no whispers, no flitting scents or shadows of friendly figures. He sniffed the air, listening to the deep breaths of the sleeping cats below as they slept by the Moonpool.

            He slunk silently to the side, hiding behind a stone. He didn't dare go forwards to touch the Moonpool, but he'd hoped that if StarClan had words to share with him, they could find him easily. He listened to the sleeping breaths of the other cats and fell asleep.

            Stars filled his vision. It was if a great gust of wind had thrown him into the inky black sky and left him there, floating among the bright, cold lights. The undergrowth of StarClans hunting grounds prickled his pelt, his paws ghosting over the lush grass unnaturally. He scanned the environment and sniffed the air, picking up Leafpool's familiar scent and heading quietly towards it.

            Jaypaw looked down from atop a ridge. Below him, Leafpool stood in front of two grey she-cats, many other cats surrounding them. "Bluestar, Cinderpelt, it's good to see you!" She purred, nodding to each of them in turn.

            "You come with good news," Bluestar, a slender, proud she-cat, meowed.

            "Yes," Leafpool replied. "Greystripe has returned. But there is a problem; Firestar doesn't know who should be ThunderClan's deputy."

            "Firestar is wise," Bluestar meowed. "He will choose who is best."

            "It will be a hard decision," a tall white tom beside her added.

            "What is the right answer?" Leafpool asked.

            "There is none. Firestar has to make his own choice. StarClan will support him either way," Cinderpelt meowed.

            Jaypaw backed away, shaking his head. Some advice that was! How would that help Firestar make his choice? Jaypaw raised his nose to the air and caught Mothwing's apprentice Willowpaw's scent. Was she here, too? He followed it, paws stepping soundlessly over the ethereal forest floor.

            "Mudfur?" He heard her meow.

            He peered over the large root of a massive tree and saw her gazing around a clearing. She was much smaller than he'd imagined, her face pretty and her fur a creamy grey and mottled with tabby stripes. Her body was sleek and lithe, and he wondered if all RiverClan cats were like her.

            "Yes, little one?" A brown and black spotted tom emerged from the ferns and touched her nose gently in greeting.

            Jaypaw ducked down.

            "It's good to see you, Mudfur," Willowpaw purred.

            "You did well with Dapplepaw's stomach-ache yesterday," Mudfur praised.

            "Was I right to give her reassurance rather than herbs?" Willowpaw asked, sounding anxious.

            "Yes. She got better on her own, and the herbs can be saved for a cat with a greater need," Mudfur meowed.

            Jaypaw peeped over the root again. Willowpaw's tail was flicking happily. "Have you news to share with RiverClan?"

            "Beware the Twolegs upstream. Their kits are trying to block the water that feeds the Clan."

            "I'll let Mothwing know," Willowpaw promised.

            Jaypaw's whiskers tingled. Why didn't Mudfur tell Mothwing himself? Did she not get along with her old mentor? Or would Mudfur only share tongues with Willowpaw?

            He backed away from the tree. If Willowpaw was dreaming of Mudfur, who was Mothwing dreaming of? He opened his mouth to taste the air, searching out Mothwing's scent.

            He smelled nothing. Willowpaw's scent had disappeared, as though her dream has slipped through the cracks like rainwater. He tried to draw Mothwing's scent to him, as he had done with Willowpaw, but nothing came. He closed his eyes and allowed the forest to slide from his consciousness, letting himself flit back into the hollow. When he opened his eyes, the Moonpool was shining brightly far beneath him. He could see all the medicine cats sleeping around the pool, and himself a few fox-lengths away, tucked in behind a boulder.

            _I'm seeing outside my body,_ he realized. He turned his attention to Mothwing, who was breathing more heavily than the others, her paws twitching as the others lay still.

            Closing his eyes, Jaypaw focused on her mind, willing himself into her thoughts. He scented prey and then water, and opened his eyes to find himself among reeds and horsetails at the edge of a lake. Mothwing was a few tail lengths ahead of him, her cream body blending beautifully with her ginger tail and legs. Jaypaw peered closer; her eyes were blue and clear, and her tail was long and plumed like a feather. She was stalking a frog among the reeds. She pounced on it as it hopped, then let it go and watched it hop again. Her whiskers were twitching with amusement. A butterfly fluttered above her head and she sprang up, plucking it from the air and holding it so close that its wings tickled her nose.

            With a jolt, Jaypaw realized that this was not StarClan's hunting grounds. This was the shore of the lake that stretched between ThunderClan and RiverClan. Mothwing was dreaming the ordinary dreams of any Clan cat.

            _Are any of the other medicine cats dreaming ordinary dreams?_ Jaypaw thought, letting his vision flit back to StarClan's hunting grounds. He wanted to see the other cats, completely ignoring his reason for being there in the first place. He couldn't help was he dreamt, right? Somehow, he wasn't so sure anymore.

            He sniffed the air, back in StarClan's territory.

            "Jaypaw?" He jumped, turning around and finding himself face to face with Spottedleaf. "How did you get here?"

            "I walked?" He answered, tilting his head. Spottedleaf blinked back at him, looking surprised and confused.

            "Yes, but-"

            "That's not good enough, Tallstar!" A rasping meow, one Jaypaw identified as Crowfeather's, sounded to the left. Jaypaw hurried after it, ignoring Spottedleaf's warning meow. He ducked down, watching the black tom glare at tall, lanky black and white tom. Spottedleaf ducked down beside him, annoyance radiating off of her.

            "Don't interrupt them!" she hissed quietly. Jaypaw gave the barest of nods, focused on the scene in front of him.

            "Crowfeather, he's your leader and you have to respect him," Tallstar sighed.

            "He's paranoid! He keeps a guard in front of his den at all times, and two at the camp entrance," Crowfeather hissed. "We don't have enough warriors to keep up with the patrols he keeps sending out. He's convinced that ThunderClan is plotting against him!"

            "There's nothing to be done, Crowfeather, we cannot talk sense into an unwilling mind!" Tallstar shook his head. "Onestar is smart, and good and kind, I know he is. It's just buried in his paranoia. Give him some poppy seeds, help him sleep. He may come around."

            "He's delusional," Crowfeather snapped.

            "He is WindClan's leader." Tallstar's voice was hard.

            "I cannot heal his mind, Tallstar. There _will_ be a war with ThunderClan. Is this what you wanted when you made him leader?"

            "No," Tallstar admitted. "He's... changed. But you have to live with it until a new leader takes his place."

            "You were not given this gift so you could spy on other Clans!" Spottedleaf's sharp hiss made Jaypaw jump. The vision in front of him faded away and he growled.

            "Then tell me why I was given this gift at all!" he snapped.

            "Why are you here, Jaypaw?" Spottedleaf sounded annoyed.

            "I want answers. For the dreams." Jaypaw looked into Spottedleaf's eyes. She tilted her head, confused.

            "What dreams?"

            "The dreams you've been sending! The ones that led me here!"

            "StarClan has sent no dreams," Spottedleaf meowed.

            "Then how did I know that the Moonpool was here?" Jaypaw asked, anger and frustration sparking through his pelt. "Why have I been dreaming of the Moonpool if StarClan did not send the visions?"

            Before Spottedleaf could answer, he was awake, his eyes opening to blindness. He could hear the voices of the medicine cats as they woke from their dreams. Heart racing, he scrambled to his paws and waited, low to the ground.

            They were leaving, heading down the path. Jaypaw, anxiety coursing through his veins, scrambled after them, staying a good distance away. The wind was at his back and pushed him down, and he hoped fervently that the others would not scent him.

            When Leafpool said her goodbyes to the other cats, Jaypaw could hear her pause, waiting for them to leave.

            "I know you're there," Leafpool meowed quietly into the forest. Jaypaw stiffened and held his breath. He'd been found out!

            "Jaypaw?" She called again, sounding nervous.

            "Yeah, I'm here," Jaypaw meowed timidly, standing up and emerging from the bracken. "How'd you know?"

            "Mothwing woke up before the others," Leafpool replied. "She found you." A tense anger flashed through her pelt. "You should not have followed us, Jaypaw, we went to share tongues with StarClan!"

            "I know, I saw you," Jaypaw's meow trembled, not used to feeling anger come from the usually gentle Leafpool.

            "You... saw me?" She sounded stunned.

            "I was watching from atop the ridge... you spoke to Bluestar and Cinderpelt."

            "You were _watching?_ How?"

            "When I fell asleep, that's what I saw. I can't help what I dream." Jaypaw shrugged his shoulders and nervously faced away.

            Leafpool stepped towards him. "What did they say?"

            "Bluestar said that Firestar should make his own decision," Jaypaw replied. "But really I just think they don't want to make the decision themselves. They could just-"

            "You understood!" Leafpool's meow came out in a shocked whisper. "You really were there..."

            Jaypaw was puzzled. Of course he understood! Why wouldn't he? He was blind, not deaf, and besides Leafpool knew he could see just fine in his dreams.

            "How did you find your way here?" Leafpool asked. "Surely Brightheart didn't take you this far out of ThunderClan territory?"

            "I followed you..." Jaypaw replied. He could sense wariness flickering within Leafpool, as if she were afraid of his answer

            "You followed my scent, you mean? All the way from the Hollow?"

            "Sort of... I'd dreamt of the journey before, so I knew it already."

            Leafpool gasped.

            "I can't help what I dream!" Jaypaw protested.

            Leafpool turned away from him then. Jaypaw could feel the clouds of thoughts whirling in her mind as if they were his own. His fur began to bristle in fear.

            "What does this mean?" He heard her  whisper to herself.

            "Why should it mean anything?" Jaypaw's voice wavered. "I only followed you to get answers for my dreams..."

            "And did you?" Leafpool asked. "Did they tell you why they sent them?"

            Jaypaw shuffled his paws. "Spottedleaf said they... didn't send any dreams. At all."

            Leafpool sucked in a breath. Then she shook herself and moved closer to him. Jaypaw could feel her breath fanning his whiskers.

            "Jaypaw, listen to me. What happened here tonight is extraordinary, but you cannot tell anyone about this."

            "Why not?"

            "Because _warriors_ do not have dreams like that. Nor have I met any medicine cat whose visions are as powerful as yours. I have only walked in another cat's dreams once, and it was with the power of StarClan."

            "What are you saying?" Jaypaw's tail curled defensively. "Am I meant to be a medicine cat because of some stupid dreams?"

            "You are meant to be _you_ , Jaypaw. Let no-one tell you different." Leafpool shook her head. "Tell me, apart from the journey to the Moonpool, have you ever dreamt of anything that has come true?"

            "Not really," Jaypaw admitted. "Dreams are... just dreams, aren't they?" Even as he said this, he knew it wasn't true.

            "Have you ever entered another cat's dreams before? Beside's mine?"

            "Only tonight," Jaypaw ducked his head, almost shamefully. "I uh... saw the other medicine cat's dreams as well. Willowpaw, Crowfeather, and Mothwing-"

            "Mothwing?" Leafpool cut in. Anxiety radiated from her.

            "Y-yeah... she didn't dream of StarClan..."

            Leafpool swallowed audibly, then let out a shaking breath. "Let's return. Please, Jaypaw, don't tell anyone about your dreams. But if you have anymore, please let me know. It could be very important."

            "But StarClan didn't send them!" Jaypaw followed her as she headed towards the Hollow, parting long grass with her narrow shoulders. "Sometimes a dream is just a dream, right?" Jaypaw remembered his last dream and shuddered. He prayed that the dark shadow he saw was not real.

            "Sometimes," Leafpool said softly. "But somehow I think that maybe your dreams are something else entirely."

            Jaypaw's mind whirled in confusion, thoughts and panic spreading through his body. He followed Leafpool back to camp in tense silence, the birds in the trees chirping in the coming dawn. The confusion he'd seen in Spottedleaf's eyes worried him.

            If StarClan didn't send him those dreams, then how did they come true?

 

 


	13. Chapter 10

"Let all cats old enough to catch their own prey join here beneath the Highledge for a clan meeting!"

            Hollypaw jerked up her head, Firestar's yowl jolting her from her morning nap. She sighed, sad to leave her warm nest, and rolled over. The dawn air was sweet and heavy with dew. Beside her, Honeypaw groaned and shifted in her nest.

            Jaypaw was already stretching out on Hollypaw's other side, curling his tail back until the tip brushed his spine. "What does Firestar want so early?" he yawned.

            "Clan meeting! Come on," Hollypaw jumped to her paws and slid out of the den behind Berrypaw.

            "Slow down!" Berrypaw complained as she swerved around him.

            "The faster hunter catches the most mice!" Hollypaw meowed back at him, bounding towards the familiar back of her mentor. She heard her denmate grumble half-heartedly behind her.

            "Morning!" Sorreltail purred cheerfully.

            "Good morning!" Hollypaw replied, sitting down and wrapping her fluffy tail over her paws. She looked up at the Highledge to see what Firestar called them for.

            He stood with his head held high, the dawn light catching his brilliant orange coat and making it blaze like fire. He looked down warmly and proudly as his clan gathered below.

            Just in front of the Highledge, Brackenfur and Greystripe sat, their tails curled neatly around their paws. Both looked freshly groomed; even Greystripe, who until this morning had still seemed ragged from his long journey. Now, his long fur was smooth and free of burrs and other debris at last, though he still seemed far too skinny in comparison to Brackenfur, whose body was strong beneath his short pelt.

            "Do you know what's going to happen?" Hollypaw asked Sorreltail, realizing that Firestar must have decided who was to be deputy.

            "Not yet," Sorreltail purred. "Firestar called those two into his den before dawn."

            Lionpaw and Jaypaw padded up beside her. Jaypaw sat between the two of them, shivering. The small ruff on his neck and the fluff on his tail did not make up for the thin coat that covered his body. Lionpaw squished closer to him, using his long, thick tail to shelter his brother from the cold wind that was blowing through the hollow.

            "Greystripe and Brackenfur are below the Highledge, facing us." Sorreltail leaned over and meowed to him.

            "I know," Jaypaw meowed sleepily. Hollypaw was surprised; usually her brother would have snapped at Sorreltail's unwanted assistance, but he seemed far too tired to do so. She wondered what he was doing to make himself so exhausted. Hollypaw pressed closer as another shiver passed though him, grateful for her thick black coat.

            Her attention was drawn away from her littermate as Millie sat in front of them. Daisy, her belly swollen with the promise of kits, plopped herself beside Millie with a friendly purr. Rainwhisker and Thornclaw sat on her other side, chatting idly. Millie no longer seemed afraid of being boxed in by so many cats, and she simply gazed up at Firestar calmly.

            "I know you've all been wondering what will happen now that our previous deputy has returned," the clan leader began.

            Greystripe wrapped his bushy tail tighter around his paws, meeting Millie's eyes as if for encouragement. Brackenfur's ear twitched.

            "When we left the forest, I thought I would never see Greystripe again," Firestar confessed. "There were many nights where I looked up at the stars and tried to imagine Greystripe among them."

            Hollypaw glanced over at her brothers and tried to imagine what it would feel like to lose them. She didn't like the thorn-prick feeling that stabbed at her heart.

            The ThunderClan leader went on. "Greystripe was my deputy and friend. I trained with him and fought beside him. Having him back is like having one of my own lives restored," Firestar looked down fondly at the grey warrior.

            "He's going to make Greystripe deputy!" Hollypaw hissed under her breath, her claws digging into the grass below. Was that the right choice?

            "Just wait," Jaypaw warned.

            Greystripe had met Firestar's gaze, and at his encouraging nod he stood and looked across the familiar faces of his long lost clanmates. His tail trembled nervously, and Hollypaw wondered what he was going to say.

            "I am so glad to be back with you all," Greystripe began, his amber eyes bright and genuine. "I was honoured to be your deputy once, and I would have served as deputy for many more moons. However, after thinking long and hard about it, I've decided that after Millie's training is complete and she becomes a full warrior of ThunderClan, it will be time for me to retire to the elders den."

            The clan fell into a shocked silence. Hollyleaf blinked; she couldn't believe he didn't want to be deputy. She'd give anything to be in his paws!

            "I will join you." Surprised gasps sounded as Dustpelt stood and stepped forwards, nodding to Greystripe and to Firestar. "When the time comes, when Hazelpaw is made into a warrior, I will retire as well." He ducked his head. "I hope I honour my clanmates with my last deed as a warrior."

            "Of course, Dustpelt," Firestar sounded choked, looking at the cats he'd trained with. Sandstorm stood from her position and padded stiffly up to the two toms.

            "I won't be far behind you," she purred. "But I think I'll outlast you two oldies by a few moons!"

            There were good natured chuckles throughout the clan. Hollypaw shook her head; she'd always thought that the senior warriors would be warriors forever, never even considering that they would retire. She looked at Dustpelt and noticed how his fur clung to his body, and how his hips seemed to be giving him trouble. Sandstorm and Greystripe both had white peppering their faces.

            _Even heroes grow old and frail,_ Hollypaw thought sadly.

            "I hope that makes your decision a bit easier, Firestar," Greystripe purred. Firestar nodded at his old friend, his gaze drawn towards Sandstorm. Something unidentifiable flashed through Firestar's face, and he shook his head.

            "Brackenfur has served as a loyal deputy, and has helped me lead the clan through some of our most terrifying challenges," Firestar meowed, bringing the clans attention back to the golden warrior. "I have never once seen him waver in his loyalty to his clanmates. Brackenfur will remain the rightful deputy of ThunderClan."

            "Brackenfur!" Brambleflower and Sorreltail stood and called out, their voices echoing joyfully off the stones.

            "Brackenfur! Brackenfur!" The rest of the clan joined in, and Hollypaw raised her voice with them, her tail curled over her back.

            She saw then, her vision tunneling strangely, Brackenfur standing. The colours began to skew, and she couldn't draw her eyes away from the golden warrior. He looked stronger then, his pelt glowing and his eyes gleaming. Behind him, nine cats appeared, stars decorating their pelts. They raised their heads to the sky and cheered along with them, but their words were different.

            "Brackenstar!" Hollypaw realized what they were saying through the sound of her clanmates cheering. A shudder ran through her, her fur puffing up. The nine star-filled cats turned and looked at her before vanishing. Her vision returned to normal, and she tore her eyes away from Brackenfur, who was still sitting, thanking his clanmates for their support.

            She ducked her head, her ears drawing back. What just happened? Was that real? Her clanmates were moving on as if nothing had happened. Had it been a hallucination?

            "You okay?" Hollypaw heard Jaypaw ask. She raised her head; the clan had dispersed, all the cats going about their daily business. She turned to him, glad to see that her brothers looked just as normal as they had before the 'vision'.

            "Yeah," Hollypaw lied, "I just got overwhelmed for a moment."

            "Alright," Jaypaw replied after a moment. He brightened up, standing and stretching. "Let's go see if our mentors have something planned for us. They've all gathered by the fresh-kill pile."

            Hollypaw looked up. Jaypaw was right; Sorreltail, Brambleflower, Brightheart and Ashfur had all joined up at the fresh-kill pile. Lionpaw and Hollypaw sprang to their paws and bounded after their littermate.

            "Woah!" Sorreltail meowed, backing up a step as Hollypaw skidded to a halt beside her.

            "Looks like we've been spotted," Brightheart purred, her amber eye sparkling.

            "Well?" Lionpaw wiggled in excitement. "What are we doing?"

            Ashfur looked down at his apprentice, his expression stoic. "Hunting patrol," he meowed. "We were thinking of having a little competition between the three of you."

            "Oh?" Jaypaw meowed casually. Hollypaw snuck a glance at her brother; he'd always hated competitions. She'd never been hunting with him before, even though they'd already been apprentices for a moon. She wondered, guiltily, if he would be at a disadvantage.

            Jaypaw sent a glare her way and she quickly looked away. How did he always seem to know what she was thinking?

            "Great!" Lionpaw meowed brightly, completely unaware of the exchange between his siblings.

            "Alright, it's decided," Sorreltail meowed. "The first apprentice to catch three pieces of prey gets the first pick of the fresh-kill pile tonight!"

            Hollypaw sized up her littermates then, a competitive spark lighting in her chest. Lionpaw was bigger than her, but she was quicker. However, Jaypaw was the fastest of all three of them. Hollypaw would have to rely on her senses and her stealth to beat them.

            "Where are we going?" Jaypaw asked as the hunting party stood and headed towards the entrance.

            "Near the ShadowClan border," Brightheart told him.

            "Wait up!" Brackenfur trotted over to the group, his tail in the air. "Are you going hunting?"

            "Yeah, near that old Twoleg den," Sorreltail responded. "Want to come? We're having a competition."

            "Sure," Brackenfur purred. Hollypaw rolled her eyes and ducked into the tunnel, knowing that Brackenfur just wanted to send time with his mate.

            _Brackenfur is the deputy,_ a little voice told her, _this is your first chance to make a good impression._

Hollypaw glanced over at Brackenfur as he exited the camp behind Sorreltail. She remembered what she saw moments before. Brackenfur could become leader after Firestar, and once he did he'd need a deputy of his own.

            "You okay?" Jaypaw asked for the second time that day. "You're all spacey."

            "Says you!" Hollypaw meowed indignantly, shaking her head. Her brother's blue eyes, deceivingly expressive, were turned towards her.

            "Uh huh, whatever," he snorted, turning away. "Let's catch up with the patrol."

            Hollypaw trotted after him, her tail in the air. They caught up with Lionpaw easily, and she realized that she hadn't been out with her two brothers since their attempt to track the fox cubs. She took comfort she hadn't known she'd missed in their familiarity; walking with them beside her made everything seem so much more vivid and interesting. They belonged together, she decided. It was if a tendril of ivy had clung to them and tied them together, bound by blood and love. She sighed happily.

            They headed for the deepest part of the forest. The undergrowth grew dense around them, sprigs of grass not yet green grew taller than Sorreltail's head, and they weaved around them and ducked under bushes, the soft, budding leaves brushing the fur on her back.

            As they approached the thunderpath that led towards the abandoned twoleg nest, Jaypaw's ears pricked and he swivelled them intently on the forest ahead of them.

            "My dad and Berrypaw are up ahead," he commented idly. Brightheart gave a curt nod, while Sorreltail and Brackenfur exchanged a surprised glance. Sure enough, as the thunderpath came into view, they could hear Brambleflower's voice over the wind that caressed the grasses.

            "Don't stretch out your legs so much," Brambleflower was saying. The two were tussling on the soft, springy grass that grew under a twisted oak tree. The oak tree had claw marks on it; obviously ThunderClan cats had been using it to sharpen their claws often.

            "Hey!" Sorreltail called cheerfully. Brambleflower's head shot up and both of the toms turned towards her. "You took our spot!"

            With a purr Brambleflower and Berrypaw trotted over to them. "I was just showing Berrypaw some ambush techniques."

            "Ambush?" Jaypaw asked curiously.

            "Yeah," Berrypaw nodded excitedly. "We wait in the tree and drop down!"

            "Can we try that?" Lionpaw begged, looking at Ashfur.

            "That's a little advanced for you three," Brackenfur commented.

            "What were you planning to do?" Brambleflower asked. "Maybe we can join?"

            "Hunting competition," Brightheart purred. "And I think giving Berrypaw some healthy competition would be good for him."

            "Hah!" Berrypaw purred. "Like these tiny scraps could beat me! I'm in!"

            "Alright," Brambleflower laughed. He looked at his kits with bright, warm eyes.

            "First apprentice to catch three pieces of prey wins," Sorreltail meowed.

            "Let's get started, then," Ashfur meowed.

            "There's a mouse on the other side of the oak tree," Jaypaw meowed, lowering his voice.

            "What?" Berrypaw turned his head around in surprise.

            "It's dug under the leaf litter," Jaypaw added.

            Hollypaw pricked her ears and listened. Sure enough, she could detect the tiniest sound of scratching and scrabbling, something she would never have noticed. The scent of mouse reached her soon after, light and disappearing slightly on the wind, giving her just a small taste, mingled with the scents of the forest.

            "How'd you notice that?" Berrypaw asked Jaypaw. Jaypaw shuffled his paws shyly and he shrugged.

            "Heard it."

            "Lionpaw," Brambleflower whispered, "you have a try."

            Lionpaw began to stalk, his paws more silent than they'd ever been, but his pawsteps still heavy on the ground. His size became a disadvantage, leaving him to make tiny vibrations through the ground. However, the mouse seemed not to notice as it continued scrabbling, louder as it reached the surface of the forest floor. Hollypaw leaned forwards, whiskers twitching in anticipation of her brother's catch.

            "Brackenfur!" A call came from the forest, scaring off the mouse. Birchfall exploded over the undergrowth and skidded to a halt in front of them."ShadowClan has moved the border! They've put a new line of scent marks inside ThunderClan territory!"

            "Where?" Brackenfur asked insistently, rising to his paws.

            "I'll show you," Birchfall turned and sprinted off without warning.

            "Where's Thornclaw?" Brackenfur called after him.

            "Heading back to warn Firestar!"

            Brackenfur shared a glance with Brambleflower, then looked back at the rest of them. "You should come with," he meowed. "There may be more to this than it seems, and I don't want to split up."

            "What about Jaypaw?" Ashfur asked.

            "What about him?" Brightheart's amber eye narrowed.

            "Will he be able to keep up?" Sorreltail meowed, sharing Ashfur's concerns. Jaypaw's neck fur began to puff up and he lashed his tail, but he kept silent.

            "Just keep an eye on him, and keep up as best you can," Brackenfur responded, turning and pelting off into the forest after Birchfall.

            Hollypaw bounded after them, her siblings and Berrypaw close behind her. She snuck a glance back to her smallest brother, astonished to find him weaving through the trees as fast as a sighted cat, his paws barely skimming over the forest floor as he ran. Hollypaw turned her sights ahead of her, her pelt bristling. Had ShadowClan really moved the border?

            "Here," Birchfall skidded to a halt ahead of them. The stench of ShadowClan was almost overpowering, the border markers set a few fox-lengths away from where they should be. Berrypaw flexed his claws beside her.

            "ShadowClan warriors on the ridge," Jaypaw warned. Hollypaw looked up at the ridge that marked the old border just in time to watch three ShadowClan cats slink from the darkness of the undergrowth, eyes glinting as they peered down at the ThunderClan patrol.

            "Oakfur!" Brambleflower hissed, glaring at the scrawny, black striped tom who led the patrol.

            "A tiny kit noticed us before you did," Oakfur sneered. "How humiliating."

            "You've moved the border." Brackenfur meowed angrily. "Why?"

            "Great observation!" A black tom with a wide, round head mocked. "We were just taking what we should've a long time ago, and we _will_ take more." He flexed his claws and crouched.

            "ThunderClan isn't even a clan anymore," Oakfur put in. "It's full of kittypets and cripples," he looked pointedly at Brightheart, making both her and Jaypaw bristle. "I'm sure StarClan would agree that only true warriors are entitled to hunt on clan territory."

            "ThunderClan has nothing but true warriors!" Sorreltail hissed.

            "If you want our territory, you'll have to fight us for every pawstep!" Brackenfur added.

            Hollypaw's fur stood on end, her eyes wide. Were they really going to fight? She glanced at Brackenfur. Maybe this was the chance she needed to show Brackenfur that she was fully committed to her clan. She sank her claws into the earth, anger slowly building as she imagined them sinking into ShadowClan flesh.

            "If you say so," Oakfur jeered. ShadowClan warriors began to appear over the ridge, looking down on them with narrowed eyes and coiled muscles. Their claws glinted in the weak sunlight. It looked as though every ShadowClan cat had come to join the fight. Hollypaw swallowed her nerves, her heart beating wildly in her chest.

            She felt pelts brush up against her, and turned to see her brothers standing their ground.

            "We fight as one," Jaypaw meowed. He was still and stoic, but the subtle waver in his voice gave away his anxiety. She pressed closer. Her brother was terrified.

            "Together," Lionpaw agreed, his meow only portraying excitement. Hollypaw gave a tense nod.

            The ShadowClan warriors loomed over them, and Hollypaw gulped. She'd barely begun battle training, and these warriors were all much stronger and more experienced than her and her brothers combined. The gravity of their situation dawned on her like a sinkhole forming beneath her paws.

            _StarClan, help us!_


	14. Chapter 11

The ShadowClan warriors descended upon them like a monsoon, fast and loud like the cracking of thunder. The sound shook Jaypaw to his bones, his muscles tensing with terror as what sounded like the damned apocalypse ran down the ridge and slammed full-force into the ThunderClan patrol. Jaypaw took a deep breath to calm his nerves, trying to make sense of all the action around him.

            He slashed with a hiss at the ShadowClan warrior in front of him and his siblings, hearing the scuff of the heavy warrior's paws over the leaf-littered forest floor.

            "Get back to camp and warn Firestar!" Jaypaw heard Ashfur hiss to Lionpaw from the side. "Now!"

            Lionpaw raced off into the bushes, his feelings of alarm trailing after him and slipping out of Jaypaw's focus like water flowing down the sheer sides of the camp walls. He gulped down his terror and focused back on the battle, just in time to dodge sharply to the side as a ShadowClan apprentice barrelled into them, separating Hollypaw and Jaypaw.

            "ThunderClan has no right to these hunting grounds!" Jaypaw heard the apprentice shriek, her piney scent engulfing him. He ducked down too late this time and the apprentice landed on him, her claws outstretched and tugging at his fur. He rolled back with her momentum, letting out a furious yowl. He battered at her belly with his hind legs, biting her forepaw when it neared his teeth. Her fur was long and thick. He bit down harder.

            The she-cat ripped her paw from his jaws and sliced at his muzzle, leaving behind burning scratches that filled his senses with the smell and taste of blood, confusing him. His heart beat like a trapped bird beneath his ribcage, choking him with his terror. Brightheart had never given him a fighting lesson, and he was paying for it now. He received a painful bite on his hind leg and turned on the ShadowClan cat with claws outstretched, battering with all his strength at her ears. She howled in pain and twisted away, and Jaypaw felt a glimmer of satisfaction.

            He heard her now, his senses focused only on her. She leapt to the side, sending vibrations through him, trying to get behind him. He spun and lashed out, catching her by surprise. He jumped, landing hard onto her and pushing her, rolling and tumbling through the undergrowth. He felt the pawsteps of the older warriors thunder around him. He ignored them.

            A rush of adrenaline seemed to slow the world down. The apprentice managed to get him on his back, biting down hard on his shoulder as he clawed tufts of fur from her belly with his hind claws, his forepaws digging into the back of her neck. Her teeth punctured his skin and he could smell the blood, but he felt no pain. There was roaring in his ears, as he swiped at her face and bit at her forelimbs, finally getting her off him with an angry shriek. He leapt to his paws, panting.

            A rush of screeches and yells broke Jaypaw's concentration. _ThunderClan!_ The thought gave him hope and he jumped forwards, clumsily rearing back and battering at the ShadowClan apprentice's flank.

            "Jaypaw!" Lionpaw's meow sounded close by, and Jaypaw dropped to all four paws with a hiss. The adrenaline still had his mind ringing and his muscles sang with it. A swipe across his muzzle sent him stumbling to the side, the cartilage in his nose creaking with the impact. Blood flowed from his right nostril and into his mouth. It covered his tongue with the hot stench of iron. He fought back a gag, fur bristling.

            Lionpaw's hiss rang close now as he leapt to his brother's defence. "Jaypaw, she's ducking!" Jaypaw lashed out in front of him, paw smacking into the side of her face as the ShadowClan apprentice tried to bite at his forelegs. She hissed and ducked back. Red clouded his senses, the coppery tinge of blood coating everything in a hazy mist. He tried to read her movements through the vibrations on the ground, but his senses were smeared by the roaring of the battle around him. Panic welled in his chest.

            "Behind you!" Lionpaw's meow cut through the murk, and Jaypaw pivoted to the side, slashing out. She ducked again and he leapt, landing on her back and raking his claws down her spine, dragging her to the ground. She yowled, and when he let go she raced off, quickly and quickly disappeared.

            "She's gone," Lionpaw assured him, coming beside Jaypaw and helping him to his paws with a gentle nudge and a solid stance.

            Jaypaw nodded, panting. The adrenaline was fading, and he ached to feel it leave. It was a rush that streamed through his muscles like water flowing into a dry riverbed, calming his nerves and taking away his pain. It heightened his senses, but now they felt dull; the pain began to leech back into him, reminding him of his wounds. His scratches and bites stung, and he felt that familiar shame and embarrassment wash over him, his nose still streaming blood, knowing that she had gotten in twice as many bites as he had.

            Beside him, Lionpaw was glowing with pride and with wonder, not a scent of his own blood on him. His flank reeked of pine and ShadowClan blood.

            The screeches of the battle were quieter now, the ShadowClan party thinned out to just a few warriors. They had been backed up into ThunderClan territory, the brambles snaking around their legs and tripping them. Snagged claws and frustrated screeches gave Jaypaw a sense of sadistic satisfaction that he'd never felt before. He gripped the grass with his claws as another ShadowClan warrior raced past with Lionpaw spitting and swiping at their haunches. ThunderClan was strong, and they won the battle.

            "Retreat!" A rusty, high-pitched screech that must have been from the ShadowClan deputy Russetfur ripped through the air. The ShadowClan cats disengaged and ran full-tilt from the reaching claws of the ThunderClan warriors. Jaypaw scented Spiderleg and Whitewing as the two warriors raced after their enemies, making sure they all left ThunderClan territory.

            Jaypaw cast out his senses, searching for Hollypaw. He heard her excited meows as Sorreltail praised her on her techniques. Pettily, he searched for Brightheart. She was talking with Brackenfur and Firestar at the edge of the clearing. Jaypaw gave a short sigh, padding over to Hollypaw, trailing after Lionpaw. He didn't know what he expected from his mentor, or what she expected from him. He felt her eyes on his back.

            Jaypaw hid behind Lionpaw's bulk and sent out his senses to the clearing, scanning the injuries of his clanmates. Everyone was standing, chatting and seemingly fine. Hollypaw seemed animated and he felt no pain from her, and Lionpaw was still buzzing with excited energy. His mother Squirrelflight was busy washing her face of what he assumed was ShadowClan blood. He couldn't blame her, and wished he could do the same. The scent of blood permeated the air, coppery and thick and wrong. Jaypaw's stomach rolled. His nose was still bleeding.

            "Is everyone okay?" Firestar called out.

            "Sandstorm's torn a claw," Brambleflower meowed. He was supporting the older she-cat as she licked her paw. Jaypaw could feel the pain emanating off of it, and knew it was swelling. His own claws ached in sympathy.

            "It will heal," Sandstorm rumbled simply, standing and shaking her pelt. Jaypaw felt a glimmer of pride at her response; nothing was going to keep his grandmother down.

            "Stormfur?" Firestar prompted, turning to the bulky warrior. "That cut on your shoulder looks painful."

            "It's superficial," Stormfur assured him.

            "Jaypaw?" Firestar's worried energy was directed at him now. Jaypaw squirmed. "That's a lot of blood."

            "It's a nosebleed," Jaypaw grumbled. "It's not gonna kill me."

            "We'll watch him!" Hollypaw chirped.

            "Thank StarClan you got help so quickly," Squirrelflight meowed, flicking Lionpaw with her tail. Jaypaw was happy to fade into the background.

            "You all held out well until we came," Firestar praised.

            "Hollypaw fought like a warrior!" Brackenfur purred. Jaypaw felt a wave of pride and joy emanate from his sister at the praise.

            "And Jaypaw never gave ground," Brightheart put in. Jaypaw's ear twitched; he knew from the pride in her voice that her praise was genuine, but he still felt rotten. He gave her a nod and tried his best to look pleased. At least she'd noticed.

            "We couldn't let ShadowClan drive us from our own territory!" Sandstorm growled. "We are going to have to do something about them before the next gathering."

            "Let's start by remarking the border," Firestar meowed. "Brackenfur, you stay here with Brambleflower and Squirrelflight and mark every tree twice along the border. And keep a sharp eye out." The three of them nodded and turned, sweeping off into the undergrowth.

            "I'll take the rest back to camp," Firestar turned.

            "Can't I go with Brambleflower?" Berrypaw piped up. He was still riding out the adrenaline; Jaypaw could feel it humming in him.

            "No," Firestar meowed decisively. "You should get back and get some ointment on your scratches."

            Berrypaw deflated with a grumble and followed his leader as the ThunderClan cats headed back towards camp.

            "Did you see me jump on Oakfur?" Lionpaw meowed proudly, falling into step with his siblings. Jaypaw swiped his tongue over his nose and winced.

            "I wish I had!" Hollypaw said. "I was too busy seeing to another apprentice," she purred. "He was twice my size, but once I used a move on him that Cinderpaw taught me, he was practically begging for mercy!"

            "And you showed that ShadowClan she-cat that she was no match for a ThunderClan apprentice!" Lionpaw exclaimed, bumping Jaypaw's shoulder good-naturedly.

            "Yeah, right," Jaypaw muttered. He felt strained, wrung out and battered; he was pretty sure it was him that was walking away from that fight worse for wear. His nose dripped and he fought back a sneeze.

            "Hey," Hollypaw stopped. "You okay?" She padded to face Jaypaw, worry lacing her movements. She reached up with a tender paw and lifted his chin, looking at his drenched muzzle with keen eyes.

            "I'm fine," Jaypaw wrenched himself out of her touch and glared angrily downwards.

            "Everyone gets bloodied up once in a while," Lionpaw assured him. "She just got a lucky hit in."

            Jaypaw shook his head. His brother and sister were there, the same age as him with just as much training and yet they had no scratches or bite marks on them. He felt as stupid and lost as a newborn kit leaving the nursery for the first time.

            "What's wrong?" Hollypaw's voice was quiet, gentle.

            "It's always me," Jaypaw meowed plaintively. Even to him, his voice sounded whiney. He swallowed. "It's just... it's always _me._ "

            "Screw that," Lionpaw snapped, suddenly angry. Jaypaw flinched. "You did amazing today, Jay!" His anger quickly morphed into a gentle, loving pride. Jaypaw let it wash over him. "You are the bravest cat I've ever met. Don't ever think for one single moment that you can't do this."

            "Sandstorm's paw was bleeding," Hollypaw put in. "And she's a legend! Don't be so hard on yourself."

            Jaypaw blinked twice, hard. He decided not to think about how he'd been absolutely terrified. He swallowed whatever lump was forming in his throat, allowing, just for that moment, for the words of his siblings to soothe his humiliation. He nodded, wiping his nose with a paw. The blood was cold; his nose was no longer dripping.

            "Let's head back," Lionpaw meowed, licking Jaypaw quickly on the ear. The three stood and padded back in a comfortable silence. Jaypaw liked this, it was easy.

            "Thank you," he rasped quietly.

            "We love you, little brother," Hollypaw murmured. Jaypaw felt his siblings press closer on both sides. He let out a short purr.

            Their quiet moment was interrupted when the bustle of the camp rang in Jaypaw's ears. They were the last to arrive. Jaypaw ducked his head and followed Lionpaw down the tunnel into the camp, trying to make sense of all the voices.

            "Brightheart, grab some marigold, please!" Leafpool shouted across the camp. Jaypaw trotted in behind his brother, the clamour of voices around him slowly becoming recognisable. Brightheart jogged past him, carrying the sweet-scented herbs Leafpool had asked for.

            "Oh thank StarClan, there you three are!" Ferncloud rushed up to the siblings, Foxkit and Icekit on her tail. She stooped down and rasped a tongue over Hollypaw's head.

            "Where were you?" Icekit chirped curiously.

            "Sorry," Lionpaw laughed. "We lagged behind."

            "Well-" Ferncloud stiffened. "Jaypaw! Are you alright, you're _covered_ in blood!"

            "Uh," Jaypaw blinked. "I'm fine, it was just-"

            "Leafpool!" Ferncloud called out before Jaypaw could stop her. Leafpool turned, her worry sparking up when she saw the three. She sprinted over, away from Stormfur's side.

            "What's wrong?" She asked instantly. Jaypaw felt paws on his face and he flinched away. His ears were burning in shame.

            "Just a nosebleed," Jaypaw grumbled, allowing his aunt to prod his sore nose. She tilted his head this way and that, even making him open his mouth.

            "It's stopped now, you should be alright," Leafpool sighed, dropping her paws. She turned to Lionpaw and Hollypaw. "Are you two injured?"

            Jaypaw frowned as his siblings shook their heads. He licked a paw and furiously scrubbed at his face.

            "Are you sure?" Ferncloud fretted, looking over the three of them.

            "They're fine," Leafpool's voice dripped with relief. A call sounded at the other side of the camp. "I'll have to chat later," Leafpool meowed before rushing off.

            "Did you guys see any big warriors? Was Blackstar there?" Foxkit asked. He and his sister were wiggling with excitement. They were to be made apprentices any day now, and had missed out on the battle by a mouse-length.

           Jaypaw tuned Lionpaw and Hollypaw out as they launched into the story. He didn't want to hear it. He felt their pride and wished he could feel the same. He continued to wash his face glumly, his scratches stinging.

            "Do you want some help?" Ferncloud asked. Her voice was sweet, and full of pride. She was sincere and kind and Jaypaw knew she loved him.

            He shook his head, getting to his paws. "I can deal with it myself," he croaked bitterly, lashing his tail. "At least then I'd be able to do _something_ right today." He marched off, ignoring the wave of hurt that Ferncloud sent, her eyes digging holes in his back. He swallowed back a cry of frustration; he wanted nothing more than to let Ferncloud wash the blood from his face and curl around him in that protective way she does for all the cats she'd help raise. He wanted to sit and laugh with his siblings, tell glorious stories of battles and hunts, and make his two youngest clanmates gasp in wonder. He wanted to be good. He knew he wasn't.

            Jaypaw sat down stiffly on a soft, springy grass outside the apprentices den and got to work. He cleaned his paws and face, scrubbing dried clots from his cheeks and neck. Poppypaw joined him after a while, her pelt fresh with the scents of the forest. She'd been on a hunting patrol, he thought idly. Missed the battle.

            He felt her eyes on him for a long while, watching him. He stiffened and sent a glare in her direction.

            "Want something?" he hissed.

            "You missed a spot," she answered, ignoring his tone. She stood and reached over, swiping a tongue over the dip of his nose between his eyes. When she was pleased with the blood being gone she sat back.

            "There, that's better," she purred.

            Jaypaw didn't respond. He glared at her grouchily and lay down. He rested his head on his front paws and heaved a great sigh.

            "What's wrong Jaypaw?" Poppypaw meowed. "You're especially gloomy today."

            "Do you think I can be a warrior?" Jaypaw asked. His voice was small, emotionless. Poppypaw was surprised.

            "Do _you?_ " She meowed. "Jaypaw, you can ask everyone in this clan and get a hundred different answers, but nobody can make that decision but you." Poppypaw ran her tail gently down his back.

            Jaypaw sighed again and closed his eyes. It was a question he didn't want to ask himself. His nose stung.

            "But Jaypaw, if you really want my opinion," Poppypaw purred, moving towards the den. "I think you can totally do it." The branches of the yew bush rattled softly as she disappeared into the den.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short hiatus! Double update to make up for it, enjoy!


	15. Chapter 12

Jaypaw let his paws hang over the edge of the stone he was perched on, listening to the sounds of his clanmates. The sun had slipped behind the trees and the air had grown cold, the fresh scent of twilight tainting the breeze that swirled through the hollow. The battle had left the camp buzzing with energy, and while the warriors ran out to recheck the borders and hunt until the fresh-kill pile was over-filled, the apprentices who fought were forced to rest.

            His scratches still stung and Jaypaw was exhausted, but he wished furiously that he had something to do. Anything to take his mind off the dark cloud growing in his heart.

            Below him, his siblings tussled on the grass, excitedly testing new battle moves that Berrypaw was showing them. Jaypaw's tail twitched as he listened to their happy teasing, the vibrations of their paws drumming under his body.

           His mind wandered, back to the battle. He kept wondering if he could have beaten that apprentice. He'd been able to follow her movements, but it took all of his focus. Everything was so _loud;_ he'd been distracted easily, and as soon as he lost focus the ShadowClan she-cat would swipe at him. If Lionpaw hadn't shown up, he would have lost.

            He could blame it on Brightheart, who'd never given him battle training even though he'd been an apprentice for little under a moon now. He wanted to, to find some way out of the realization that sat cold in his belly, hard and solid as if he'd swallowed a lump of ice, but he couldn't make himself angry. He was just tired.

            "Brackenfur! Brambleflower!" Firestar's greeting jolted Jaypaw from his thoughts. The thorn barrier rustled as his father's patrol returned, having been gone for most of the day. The sharp scent of pine needles made Jaypaw's nose wrinkle.

            "We've remarked the border," Brackenfur meowed. "They had moved it the entire length, so it took some time, but we weren't met with any more resistance."

            "Good," Firestar nodded. He turned to the clan, his voice raised so all cats could hear.

            "ShadowClan claimed that this battle was just, and that their clan is _purer_ than ours because many of their warriors are clanborn. However," pride flashed through Firestar's pelt and Jaypaw listened intently, "ThunderClan is stronger for our compassion. Had we not taken in those who needed our help, we wouldn't have warriors like Stormfur and Brook, nor would we have Daisy and her three kits. Our clan may be mixed, but our loyalties will never waver. ShadowClan mistakes our mercy for weakness, and we showed them today that they are _wrong._ There isn't a single cat in this clan who doesn't deserve to be here."

            "We will never let other clans tell us who we are!" Brackenfur said. Mews of agreement rose from the words of the two toms.

            "At the next Gathering, we will make it clear that ThunderClan's business is its own," Firestar promised. "We will defend the borders of our home as we always have."

            Approval rippled through the clan, though Jaypaw could feel doubt clinging like burrs to some of his clanmates. He, too, was worried about the reactions of other clans, but it wasn't as if the other clans were entirely free of cats from outside sources. Jaypaw distinctly remembered Brambleflower telling him that Russetfur, the current deputy of ShadowClan, was once a rogue. The politics of other clans confused him; it seemed as if both WindClan and ShadowClan were trying to come up with any reason to go to war with ThunderClan, but Jaypaw didn't understand what it all was for.

            He shook his ears and stood with a sigh. He leapt down from the stone and headed off to his warm nest beneath the yew bush, hoping his thoughts would quiet down and let him sleep.

***

            Jaypaw sat up with a sigh, the air of the den warm from the breaths of his sleeping denmates. He finally admitted defeat after trying and failing to sleep, only slipping into a light doze. His thoughts whirled; he still tried to convince himself that he would make it as a warrior, that one defeat wouldn't make him quit. But with every thought, his hope grew hollower. His mind kept jumping back to how long it took him to even catch his first piece of prey, and how he still didn't feel comfortable with his hunters crouch. He remembered his siblings, and how he could only feel that they believed in him, and the guilt over it made his heart hurt. He didn't want to disappoint them, he wanted to grow with them and get their warrior names on the same day, just as they'd always dreamed of as kits.

            His mind was spinning, making him feel sick and anxious. He knew he wouldn't be able to sleep like this. With a quiet shake of his head, Jaypaw stood and picked his way carefully out of the den, his paws tentative as he made sure he didn't step on any of the sleeping apprentices who were sprawled out around him. Berrypaw's snores sounded loudly in the air, while Mousepaw and Hazelpaw were curled up tightly behind him. Honeypaw and Poppypaw's nests were empty, the moss cold beneath his paws.

            A frost-kissed wind greeted him outside the den, rattling the bare branches of the forest above him. The air was colder tonight than it had been all moon, the scent of rain blowing threateningly overhead. Jaypaw shivered; he would have to be quiet. The way to the Moonpool would be very cold this time of night, but at least he would find some answers there.

            At the entrance of the camp, Brackenfur sat with his back to the camp, watching the forest. He was on guard, and Jaypaw could feel the calm energy that flowed through the older tom's body. His tail curled tighter around him, disturbing the leaves slightly. Jaypaw paused, wondering if he should turn back and find another way out of camp.

            Before he could make up his mind, he felt quiet surprise in Brackenfur's thoughts as he noticed Jaypaw lingering beside him.

            "You're out late," he observed.

            "I can't sleep."

            "It can be like that after a battle," Brackenfur said.

            "I'm going into the forest," Jaypaw meowed. He waited for surprise to flash through Brackenfur, but the older tom just sent him a wave of understanding.

            "Do you want me to go with you?" He asked instead. "Brook won't mind starting her watch early."

            "No thank you."

            "You need some time alone," Brackenfur guessed.

            Jaypaw nodded and Brackenfur went on, "At least it's quiet tonight. I'll keep my ears pricked for you, just in case."

            "Thanks, Brackenfur." Jaypaw sighed in relief, glad that Brackenfur didn't bother treating him like a helpless kit. "I'll be back soon," he promised, pushing his way through the thorny entrance and into the fresh-scented forest.

            "Stay safe."

            As Jaypaw climbed the slope, he felt his thoughts quiet and his anxiety calm. The thoughts and feelings of his clanmates were noisy, even more so when he was wrapped in his own anxious thoughts. He raised his nose and opened his mouth, tasting the air around him. The new-leaf air was crisp this time of night, the cold dew clinging to the dry grass beneath his paws.

            Jaypaw turned and followed the path that was so familiar to him, though he'd only walked it once before when he'd followed Leafpool. Dry branches scraped his back as he walked, tall and confident. An owl hooted in the distance, and the forest sighed in a soft breeze. The night had always been quiet and peaceful, and Jaypaw let his mind drift.

            The scent of WindClan made his nose twitch, the wind nipping at the tops of his ears as he emerged from the forest. The stream that marked the border between ThunderClan and WindClan bubbled slowly by. Jaypaw turned to the left and began to climb the steep, rocky path that led to the Moonpool. The memory of this climb seemed to be burned into his paws; he quickened his step eagerly.

            The springy moorland grass turned to hard stone beneath him, and soon Jaypaw was scrabbling up the winding path between the tall, tooth-shaped stones that lined the entrance to the hollow. The fresh scent of the mountains rolled down towards him, and he felt a sense of longing that he hadn't felt before. The path evened out, and his paws slipped easily into dimpled crevices of ancient paw prints from cats long, long before him. The whispering voices and soft pelts of cats surrounded him, welcoming him.

            Jaypaw paused at the top of the spiraling path; though his eyes saw nothing he could clearly picture the sloping walls of the hollow, the small waterfall tricking down the stones that fed the pool and the pool itself, wide and clear and cradling the moon and the stars within its depths, reflecting blue, shimmering light that cast the shadows of unseen cats upon the walls. The whispering around him had grown into a droning purr of voices, and as he picked his way down towards the pool he strained his ears to make out their words.

            "Welcome, Jaypaw."

            "You've come at last, my dear friend."

            "Come, Jaypaw."

            Scents flooded him, familiar and comforting though he has no recognition of them. A soft pelt brushed up against him, and he felt the eagerness of the StarClan warrior. Another pelt guided him down to the Moonpool. A faint memory tugged at his mind, of a journey through the snow, the pain of the cold in his paws, a honey-sweet voice and a feeling of true peace.

            Jaypaw stopped at the edge of the pool and lay down on the smooth, stone shore. He lapped up some of the cold water, feeling it rush through his body with a cold, fresh sensation. He closed his eyes and curled his tail over his nose, allowing the voices to send him to sleep.

            When he opened his eyes, he found himself in a lush, green woodland. The air was warm and sweet, the calls of songbirds whistling quietly through the trees. The tall oak trees soared overhead, their branches reaching into a dark blue sky, filled with millions of stars, more clear than he'd ever seen before in his dreams. A warm breeze lapped at his fur, rustling the arched ferns above his back. Everywhere around him thrummed with life, and his nose twitched at the scent of prey.

            However, Jaypaw noticed, he was alone.

            "Spottedleaf?" He called, rising to his paws. "Cinderpelt?"

            The forest rustled, but there was no response. He looked around, bitter disappointment and frustration growing in his chest. Why had all those voices welcomed him into the hollow if they were just going to leave him to wander StarClan's hunting grounds by himself? He snorted in resentment. StarClan always made things so difficult. They plagued him with dreams but gave no answers.

            Frustrated, Jaypaw began to wander through the trees. At least here he felt warm and safe, and he could _see_. In the waking world, he never even thought twice about being able to see, but now that he could, he wanted to commit it all to memory. He shrugged, taking everything in. If this ended up being a wasted trip, at least he could enjoy the sights and smells of the lush forest.

            He broke into a sprint, knowing the ground would not trip him like it did in ThunderClan's forest. He relished the wind though his whiskers and the floor disappearing beneath his paws. He ran so fast he almost felt as if he were flying.

            Suddenly, the forest cut abruptly to stone. He skidded to a halt, peering up in confusion at the open sky and stony wall in front of him. He skirted the edge of the massive boulder, and leapt on top of it. He sucked in a breath; before him mountains stretched across the horizon, beautiful and tall, stone giants covered in pine tree forests and coming to snowy peaks. The sky above them seemed to shine, the stars uncovered from the trees of the forest behind him. The scent of the mountains blew towards him, and a sense of longing returned. Quiet voices whispered with the wind, begging him to come to them.

            Just as he was about to leap up to the next stone, he heard a swish in the ferns behind him.

            "Jaypaw." He recognized the meow at once, and he turned to face the pretty tortoiseshell she-cat.

            "Spottedleaf." Jaypaw meowed, a tad annoyed at the interruption.

            "You've wandered far," Spottedleaf meowed, gesturing towards the mountains. "You are at the edge of StarClan's hunting grounds."

            "What?" Jaypaw looked back towards the mountains. "What's up there, then?"

            "Nothing important. Come, Jaypaw," she turned and disappeared back into the forest, the ferns shuddering behind her.

            Jaypaw sighed and reluctantly followed her, the whispering behind him asking him to come back, to visit soon. He felt a tug at his heart, though he wasn't sure why.

            "You shouldn't stray that far, Jaypaw," Spottedleaf warned, turning to face him once they were a few fox-lengths into the forest.

            "Why not? What's up there?" Jaypaw prompted again.

            "Why have you come to speak with StarClan?" Spottedleaf asked, ignoring his question.

            Resentment jabbed at Jaypaw's belly. If she refused to answer his questions, then he wouldn't answer hers.

            "I came because I could," Jaypaw huffed.

            Spottedleaf narrowed her eyes, annoyance flashing through her pelt. "You came to ask where your destiny truly lies, didn't you."

            Jaypaw blinked. "How did you know?"

            "How did you find your way here to the Moonpool when you're blind?" Spottedleaf asked.

            "I'm blind, not helpless."

            "Then why do you dream of this place?"

            "Are you going to keep answering my questions with more questions?" Jaypaw glared at her. Spottedleaf looked away.

            "I'm sorry," she sighed. "But I can't tell you more than you are ready to know."

            "I'm ready to know everything!" Jaypaw snapped. "Why does StarClan have to make everything so difficult?"

            "Because they fear for you," Spottedleaf snapped back, her eyes darkening.

            "Oh great, so even StarClan is treating me like a helpless kit!" Jaypaw huffed and lashed his tail.

            "Jaypaw," Spottedleaf sighed. "You can trust StarClan, I promise. You trust me, right?"

            Jaypaw looked at her. "Yes," he murmured uncertainly. He could feel her thoughts tugging at his fur, scared and affectionate, and... he searched harder, a feeling slipping from his grasp. Concentrating hard, he tracked the feeling, following it like a shimmering stream. He saw an unfamiliar forest, a stone made of silver glow, a flame-coloured tom and the feeling of _knowing_ that he was special. He felt a wave of affection for the flame coloured tom, who, he realized with a jolt, was Firestar. He saw fleeting memories of her telling a young Firestar to " _go, follow your destiny, fulfill the prophecy, you_ must _Fireheart, you must,_ " her heart full of conviction, certain she was doing the right thing. There was more, he knew, obscured by shadows, something just out of reach...

            "You have a remarkable gift," she mewed. Her eyes were wary and she turned away from him, feeling him prodding at her memories. "You can see what no other cat sees. You can go where even StarClan cannot. You must use this power to help your clan."

            "How?"

            "You must become a medicine cat."

            _No!_

He didn't want to hear it, he knew she was going to say it. _'You must, Fireheart, you must...'_ her memories played in his mind. He didn't want to listen.

            "I want to be a warrior!" Jaypaw's voice trembled in fury.

            "But you have a gift!"

            "Seeing in dreams? That's not a gift! My clanmates see all the time!"

            "But they don't see what you do. They can't go where you go."

            "So I can visit StarClan, big deal!"

            "It is a big deal!" Spottedleaf hissed. "No other cat can access the thoughts, feeling and _memories_ of the cats around them."

            "But where does that get me?" Jaypaw spat back. "I can feel other cats' pity for me, big whoop! They still treat me like I'm helpless!"

            "They don't know the power you have."

            "Power?" Jaypaw echoed.

            Spottedleaf was trembling now, her eyes narrowed hard with fury and, Jaypaw realized, with fear. She was _scared_ of Jaypaw and the power he held.

            "You have the power to shape the Clans themselves, Jaypaw."

            Jaypaw stared at her. "And I can do that as a warrior."

            "No! Accept your destiny!"

            "I don't want to!"

            "You must!"

            "It's not fair!" Jaypaw screeched, his eyes burning. He swallowed. "It's not fair," he repeated miserably.

            "I know," Spottedleaf sighed, her voice softening. She leaned forwards and brushed his muzzle softly with her paw, meeting his eyes. Jaypaw felt sleep tugging through him, and he fought it. "Your gift is not a burden, Jaypaw," she whispered. "But you must be brave, for it has more power than the sharpest claw."

            Jaypaw tried to fight the sleepiness, but it dragged him down and he collapsed heavily on the ground. It felt like he'd taken a dozen poppy seeds, his eyes closing without him allowing them. "No!" He cried weakly, trying to open his eyes, to move, to wake up.

            He opened his eyes to nothing. The air was cold, and frost covered his back. Birds chattered loudly in the trees, signaling the coming of dawn. He stood stiffly, misery making his paws heavy. His muscles ached and he stretched wearily, his mind numb.

            _You must become a medicine cat._

            He climbed to the top of the ridge, eyes stinging with emotion. There were no voices around him, and the air was cold and carried the scents rolling off the WindClan moors. He felt then, incredibly unwelcome and betrayed. He swallowed, his throat tight, and trotted down the path as quickly as he dared. He tripped, and hissed in frustration.

            _Accept your destiny._

            In that instance, Jaypaw felt his life crumble into something bleak. He knew then, that no matter how far he ran, how much he tried to prove everyone wrong, he would never escape that feeling that plagued his heart. He couldn't outrun what he'd known all along.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter goes over one of the lowest points for Jay- the original chapter is also very depressing... What I wanted to convey with this chapter (as we all know that Jay will be a warrior in the end) is the sort of hopelessness that cannot be helped, even if all around you people are encouraging you. It's something I think we all go through, when you say 'I can't do this' and it breaks your heart, and while nobody tells you that you can't, the doubt is always there. The only way to come back from that is to prove yourself wrong!  
> A good song for the ending is Dream by Imagine Dragons, I think. Came on while I was posting and I felt it fit!


	16. Chapter 13

Hollypaw awoke to the chirping of birds in the distant treetops. The soft new-leaf air was light and warm, the lingering clutches of frost turning to dew in the watery light of dawn. She stretched and sat up, blinking her eyes hard as they adjusted to the gloom.

            Beside her Lionpaw's nest was still warm, telling her he'd just left, likely on the dawn patrol. Jaypaw's nest, however, was cold and stale. She twitched her whiskers curiously; her brother had not slept there that night. With a shrug, she began to wash her paws, the wretched taste of blood still sticking in between her toes and the beds of her claws. She felt a small thrill at the memory of the battle. Fighting for her clan made her feel so _important,_ she knew that she was on the right path.

            "Hey," Brightheart stuck her head into the apprentices den, looking around through the gloom. She met Hollypaw's eyes. "Do you know where Jaypaw is?"

            Hollypaw shook her head. "Sorry, I don't know. I just woke up."

            Brightheart made an irritated sound and disappeared without another word.

            "Poor Jaypaw," Berrypaw groaned groggily, rolling over in his nest. "He'd better show up soon, Brightheart sounded like a thorn was sticking her all night."

            "Well, you can't really blame her," Mousepaw piped up, pushing his larger brother off him. "Jaypaw's not exactly the best of company. He's always causing her trouble."

            Hollypaw rolled her eyes and flicked her paw. "Right, like _you've_ never caused Spiderleg any trouble."

            "Yeah," Cinderpaw, the last apprentice in the den, sat up and shook out her fur. "Just last week didn't you get caught trying to eat a mouse while on a hunting patrol?"

            "I wasn't going to _eat_ it!" Mousepaw squawked.

            "And weren't you the one to convince Icekit to slip some stinging nettle into the warrior's den, and then denied it when she got caught?" Hollypaw added. Berrypaw sat up and let out a loud laugh.

            "That was _you?_ "

            "No...!" Mousepaw ducked his head with an embarrassed laugh. "Okay maybe, but in my defense I wasn't actually expecting her to do it!"

            Berrypaw, Cinderpaw and Hollypaw couldn't hold back their laughter at the sight of Mousepaw's guilty face.

            "Hollypaw!" A call from the clearing startled Hollypaw from her laughter.

            "Sorry guys, I've got to go, Sorreltail's calling me," she purred. "She promised that we'd go over the battle yesterday and improve on my moves."

            "Aw," Cinderpaw sighed. "I'm jealous! I've got den cleaning duty."

            "That's not too bad," Mousepaw meowed, stretching his legs. "At least Longtail's got some good stories."

            Hollypaw slipped out of the den, the chatter of her friends muffled by the branches and dry grass. She blinked as her eyes adjusted to the morning; the sun was rising from behind the mountains, casting a warm light that cut through the damp new-leaf air. The frost was already melting, the grass below her paws wet with cold dew. She peered upwards and breathed in deep and slow. The sky was a light, pale blue, and the soft, sparse clouds and warm scent to the air gave a promise that the day would be sunny and warm.

            "Ah there you are!" Sorreltail purred. Her eyes were bright and energetic, and she whipped her tail back and forth behind her. "Ready to go? The forest is calling me!"

            "Yes!" Hollypaw meowed excitedly, appreciating her mentor's energy. Sorreltail turned and streaked from the camp, prompting Hollypaw to sprint after her. She let out a giddy laugh; Sorreltail always had so much energy to burn so Hollypaw never felt bored around her, even when they were doing mundane tasks. Not only that, but her mentor was kind and smart, and she was strict when she had to be.

            The two of them reached the small sandy hollow where they trained for battle, skidding to a halt in front of the bushes that encircled it. Hollypaw ducked under, the branches scraping satisfyingly down her spine.

            As soon as she was free of the bushes, she was thrown off her paws from her right side, sent tumbling into the sand. She gave a yelp of surprise and shook her head, leaping to her paws.

            "Too slow!" Sorreltail meowed, standing in front of her. "You need to be more aware of your surroundings. ShadowClan always tries to make use of the element of surprise."

            "Right!" Hollypaw meowed, narrowing her eyes.

            "Alright Hollypaw, let's begin with a mock fight." Sorreltail let out a fierce hiss and leaned down, her tail fluffed up. "Right now I am not your mentor, but rather a ShadowClan warrior!"

            Hollypaw barely had time to process her words before Sorreltail was on top of her, rolling with her in the dirt and battering her belly with her paws. Spurred into action, Hollypaw swiped at her mentor with sheathed claws. She hit nothing but air as Sorreltail leapt away and sprinted behind her, giving her a hard _thwack_ on the back of her head.

            "Faster, Hollypaw!  Your enemies won't wait for you to gain your bearing and neither will I!"

            Hollypaw blinked; Sorreltail was out of her field of vision, but she saw then, in her mind's eye, Sorreltail leaping from her left and bowling her over. She was frozen, watching herself from outside her body, her vision tunneled and narrowed in. When her vision refocused, Hollypaw leapt back, surprised to see Sorreltail roll from the right and into her path.

            "Good!" Sorreltail meowed, pivoting and running at her. Hollypaw leapt onto her back feet and batted her mentor away with a strong blow.

           _What was that?_ She thought briefly. She felt as though she'd seen a glimpse of what was to come, and it felt the same as when Brackenfur was accepted as deputy. She frowned, ducking under Sorreltail's wipe and barreling her over. There was no time to think about that now, she had to concentrate. What was Sorreltail going to do next?

            In another vision, Sorreltail bent down and took out her legs. Instead, Hollypaw dropped down on all fours and leapt to the right, turning quickly on her back paws and leaping onto her mentors back. Sorreltail rolled and the two were sent sprawling in the sand. Holly used to momentum of her roll to right herself, her tail lashing to regain her balance. Sorreltail stood, panting.

            "Wow!" She meowed, her eyes shining. "That was brilliant! I felt as if you could read my mind! You've got good instincts, Hollypaw."

            Hollypaw gave a nod, panting and forcing her fur to lie flat. Were those visions... instinct? What that was Sorreltail meant when she told her to predict her moves? Hollypaw shook her head. No, this felt different. When she'd ducked under Sorreltail's blow it was because she'd seen Sorreltail rear back and lash her tail, not because of some vision. She didn't know what those visions were, but they made her feel powerful, albeit uneasy. She looked up at Sorreltail, prepared to ask about it, but the question died in her throat.

            _What if she thinks I'm crazy?_ She thought. _I need to be the best that I can be if I want to be leader. No, this is not something I can tell Sorreltail._ She snapped her jaw shut, pretending to listen to Sorreltail's critiques. _I have to tell my brothers. Maybe they will be able to understand._

***

            The sun was high in the sky, burning through all the remnants of the cold morning dew, by the time Sorreltail and Hollypaw finished up their training. Hollypaw shook the sand from her fur and sat down heavily.

            "Good work today, Hollypaw! You're improving quickly," Sorreltail purred. Hollypaw opened her mouth to answer, but was interrupted by Brook, who stuck her head through the new growth and into the training hollow.

            "You two wouldn't happen to know where Jaypaw is, would you?" She asked, pale eyes round. "Brightheart's been looking for him all morning!"

            "He still hasn't shown up?" Hollypaw asked, rising to her paws.

            Brook shook her head, looking worried. "Brackenfur said he left the camp last night, so we're thinking that he fell asleep in the forest somewhere..."

            "I wonder if he got lost," Sorreltail murmured.

            "No, Jaypaw knows this forest," Hollypaw interjected, her tone defensive. "He'll turn up."

            "Right," Sorreltail nodded apologetically. "Well, it's about time we head back to camp." She turned to Brook. "We'll keep an eye out for him."

            "Thank you," Brook purred. "Brightheart's very worried." She pulled her head back and trotted off into the forest.

            "Alright, let's go," Sorreltail meowed, quickly hurrying off towards the camp. Hollypaw loped after her, scenting the air for any sign of her brother's whereabouts. All she could detect was the normal scents of the forest, however. The distant scent of mouse made her mouth water.

            When she reached camp, the bustle of the day was in full effect. The elders were dozing on the sun-warmed rocks under the high ledge while Cinderpaw and Hazelpaw chatted and cleaned their den. Icekit and Foxkit were copying Lionpaw, who was showing them a simple grapple move. She was surprised when she saw them together; Icekit was small, but Foxkit was almost as tall as Lionpaw. They really were ready to move to the apprentices den, and by the tired look on Ferncloud's face as she shared tongues with Daisy, she thought so, too.

            "Take some prey and have a nap," Sorreltail meowed. "You've earned it. We're on the twilight hunting patrol, so be ready to leave as soon as the sun sets!"

            "Right!" Hollypaw purred. She glanced over at the fresh-kill pile, wondering if she should wait for the next hunting patrol, when she caught Jaypaw's scent. She turned and spotted him emerging from the thorn barrier, Brook following him and looking very relieved. From the way her brother stumbled on weary paws, and the unkempt state of his fur, she guessed that he had spent the entire night in the forest. She hurried over to him as Brook padded towards Brackenfur, likely to report the missing apprentice.

            "Where were you?" Hollypaw asked, stopping her brother from moving past her. "You look exhausted!"

            Jaypaw's eyes were bleary, and his body shook with exhaustion. More than that, by the way his tail dragged on the ground and his emotionless expression, he looked utterly defeated.

            "I have to see Firestar," Jaypaw meowed, ignoring her question. Alarm shot through Hollypaw and made her tail twitch.

            "You need to sleep, first," She meowed. "Should I get Leafpool?"

            "Please do," Jaypaw murmured. "I need to speak to her, too."

            "What's this about?" She asked, anxiety rising. Jaypaw raised his head, ears angled towards Firestar's den. "Did something happen?"

            "Ah," he said. "She's already there." He made for the tumble of rocks that lead to Firestar's den, but tripped.

            "Jaypaw!" Hollypaw meowed nervously. "Here, let me help, you're too tired to manage alone."

            Her brother, disturbingly, did not object. Instead, he leaned on his sister for support. He was trembling. Hollypaw's anxiety rose, but she bit her tongue. Jaypaw seemed unaware of her questions and she doubted that she would get an answer out of him.

            By the time they had made it up the rock fall, Jaypaw was panting slightly. Hollypaw had her tail draped over his shoulders, but he paused in front of the entrance, some clarity returning to his eyes.

            "Firestar?" Hollypaw called out.

            "Hollypaw? Come in," Firestar answered. Jaypaw moved and barged his way through the entrance.

            Hollypaw followed Jaypaw in, her tail trembling with anxiety. She'd never seen her brother so intense. Firestar looked up from where he sat with Leafpool, obviously surprised by Jaypaw's entrance. He opened his mouth to say something, but Jaypaw set his sightless gaze upon his leader, his eyes suddenly so clear and so focused that it seemed he could see Firestar as clearly as she could. Her brother raised his head and opened his mouth, his next words cutting through the rest of them as sharp as a porcupine's quills.

            "I must become a medicine cat."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long, but I am now OFFICIALLY on summer break (from school, anyways)! I'm super excited to start working on this again, and I hope you guys are excited, too :3  
> And a SUPER SPECIAL thank you to everyone who comments or sends me asks about this au; you keep my fire burning, and even if I don't reply (I'm trying!!), I still read and love every one <3
> 
> Thanks for sticking with me. :3


	17. Chapter 14

Jaypaw's tail twitched nervously as the den grew silent; the waves of shock and confusion from the others made his anxiety churn. He swallowed, his sightless gaze moved instinctively to the ground. The stone was cold beneath his paws.

            "Jaypaw," Hollypaw's voice trembled. "You can't mean that!" She took a step towards him but stopped, unsure.

            "Where is this coming from?" Leafpool asked. Her voice was slightly suspicious. "Where were you all night?"

            Jaypaw's ears drew back slightly, his exhausted mind trying to make sense of the questions. He didn't want to tell them that he'd snuck off to the Moonpool.

            "I have to train to be a medicine cat," he said. "It's my destiny."

            "You've barely started your warrior training," Firestar meowed. "Are you sure this is what you want?"

            "I..." Jaypaw shook his head. He couldn't lie to his leader. "It's something I have to do."

            "But you've always wanted to be a warrior!" Hollypaw sputtered out. "Where is this coming from?" _Why didn't you tell me?_ The unsaid question rang through Jaypaw's mind as if she'd shouted it aloud. Her confusion and worry was too much for Jaypaw; all the thoughts and feelings in Firestar's den buzzed and jumbled in his brain, each one fighting for his attention. He pressed his eyes shut and focused on the stone beneath his paws.

            "I don't know why this is so hard for you all to accept," Jaypaw grumbled miserably. He let out a small sigh, his head slumping forwards. "Everyone said I should just settle for medicine cat to begin with. I was fooling myself all along."

            There was a beat of silence. "Hollypaw," Leafpool murmured gently. "Can you give us a moment with Jaypaw?"

            Hollypaw's sharp hurt made Jaypaw's ear twitch. He sent her an apologetic glance, but she was already leaving the den.

            "Jaypaw?" He flinched at the gentle tone of Leafpool's voice. "Is training to be a medicine cat what you want to do?"

            Jaypaw didn't answer. He glared in her direction.

            "Alright," Firestar heaved a sigh. "Here is what we'll do. Jaypaw, you will stay a warrior cat apprentice."

            "But-"

            Firestar brushed his tail across Jaypaw's muzzle to silence him. "If you still believe you should train as a medicine cat after one more moon of training, then you may take Leafpool as mentor."

            Jaypaw shook his head. "But I'll be so far behind!"

            "This isn't up for debate," Firestar said sternly. After a moment, he sighed. "And Jaypaw, please remember that no matter what, no matter who tells you differently, nobody can shape our destiny but us. No one's destiny is decided at birth." There was meaning in his voice, but Jaypaw could tell that his advice was also his dismissal. Jaypaw dipped his head and backed out of the den.

            "Well?" Jaypaw flinched when Hollypaw scrambled to his paws. "What happened?"

            "Firestar told me to stay a warrior apprentice for another moon before switching." Jaypaw grumbled.

            "Oh thank goodness!" Hollypaw leaned forward and pressed her muzzle into Jaypaw's scruff. "I was so worried!"

            Jaypaw let his chin rest on the top of her head for a moment and closed his eyes. His heart still ached, but knowing that he had one more moon to train as a warrior left his legs weak with relief.

            _Not that you will get anything out of it,_ his thoughts were bitter. _It's just a waste of time._

            "You scared me," Hollypaw murmured. She drew back and pushed Jaypaw lightly with a paw. "But we can talk about it later! You need to sleep, you look dead on your paws!"

            "I'm alright," Jaypaw sighed, his legs trembling. Hollypaw brushed her shoulder against his flank, guiding him down the rock pile. He ignored the stubborn part of his brain that told him he didn't need it. He was too tired to map out the rocks in his head. His thoughts felt like they were smothered by a thick bed of snow.

            When they reached the ground, Jaypaw headed for the apprentices' den. Hollypaw followed him for a moment, but turned and bounded off somewhere, leaving Jaypaw to slip into the den by himself. He didn't mind; he could hear the chatter of cats around him, but he was far too tired to focus on who's and what's. He just wanted to sleep and forget about everything that had happened. He ducked his head and scrambled under the yew bush, stifling a yawn.

            The den was silent and cool, all the nests empty. Jaypaw padded over to his nest, letting out a sigh of relief when the soft moss touched his paws, his bed deep and tempting. He laid down gratefully, mind buzzing with exhaustion. He had just curled his tail around his nose when Lionpaw and Hollypaw entered the den together.

            Without a word exchanged between them, they curled around their smaller sibling. Jaypaw could feel their worry for him, but it was far away as the gentle lapping of their tongues on his pelt lulled him into a deep, dreamless sleep.

***

            When Jaypaw awoke, the den was empty and cold. He yawned, wondering how long he'd slept for. His heart was still heavy, but his body and mind was no longer weighed down by exhaustion. He stood and stretched, shaking moss from his coat. He sat and began to wash the dirt and dust from his pelt, and once he was satisfied he slipped from the den.

            "There you are," Brightheart's scent surprised him. She had been waiting just outside the den, dull anger coming off her in waves. He swallowed, his heart racing nervously.

            "Oh, hi," Jaypaw meowed softly, drawing his ears back. He shuffled where he stood. "What's-"

            "Don't," Brightheart snapped. She let out a tense sigh and stood, her tail sweeping the ground. "Follow me."

            Jaypaw was quick to follow ad Brightheart stalked from the camp. He followed her through the thorn tunnel and into the forest.

            "Where are we-" Jaypaw started to ask, but Brightheart stopped as soon as he opened his mouth. He faced her apprehensively.

            "Where were you all night?" She asked, her voice strained.

            "Out," Jaypaw said vaguely, turning away.

            "Out?" Brightheart hissed. "You are an apprentice, Jaypaw! When you disappear for the whole night we worry! Many of your clanmates spent the morning looking for you when they had so many things they could have been doing. So tell me, what was so important that you had to waste your clanmates valuable time?"

            Jaypaw swallowed but didn't answer, the hot guilt making his ears and eyes burn.

            "And then you come back looking like you'd fallen down the ravine and ask Firestar to be made a medicine cat apprentice?" Brightheart's voice was raised now. "And still you _refuse_ to tell me where you've been?"

            " I was looking for StarClan's guidance," Jaypaw admitted quietly. "I don't think I'm cut out to be a warrior."

            "And did you find it?" Brightheart demanded. If she was surprised, she didn't let it show. "Because, Jaypaw, if you aren't determined to be a warrior I can't help you."

            "They told me my destiny is to become a medicine cat."

            "And is that what you want?" Brightheart sounded frustrated. "If you're just wasting my time-"

            "What does it matter what I want?" Jaypaw hissed back. He lashed his tail behind him. "Why are you suddenly concerned with what _I_ want? No, I don't want to be a medicine cat, but it's my only choice!"

            "It's not! Jaypaw, you _always_ have a choice. If you want to be a warrior, I can make you a warrior, but you _have to trust me._ "

           "Well, I don't!" Jaypaw dug his claws into the ground. "Don't think I don't know how you look at me. That I don't notice that you haven't given me any battle training, that we haven't joined a hunting patrol. I'm embarrassing to you because I'm your first apprentice and I'm _blind."_

            There was a beat of silence. "Jaypaw," Brightheart's voice was soft. "That's not true."

            "Then why?" Jaypaw wailed. "Why won't you train me? Why am I so far behind my siblings? Why were you teaching me herbs while Lionpaw and Hollypaw were learning how to fight?"

            "Because," Brightheart paused. Her voice was barely a whisper, laced with guilt. "I was scared."

            "Of _what?"_

            "Of you giving up." She sighed. "Jaypaw, you're stubborn and hard to please, but I know you can do this. I was worried that if we moved on from hunting, something you still have not perfected, and started something that I knew you'd fail the first try, you might give up." She shook her head. "I taught you herbs and remedies because it's an important skill that I believe every apprentice should learn, and I knew you'd be good at it. But I see now that my methods only did more harm than good."

            Brightheart moved closer to Jaypaw, resting her head atop his. Jaypaw squeezed his burning eyes shut, accepting the comfort his mentor offered.

            "I know that I wasn't making you happy. I'm sorry, Jaypaw. But if you trust me, if you continue to train, I _will_ make you a warrior."

            "I want to be a warrior," Jaypaw choked out. "I... I trust you, Brightheart. I want to learn everything you can teach me."

            "You will," Brightheart meowed, pulling back. Her determination was fiery. "You will be the best warrior in ThunderClan."


	18. Chapter 15

"Icepaw! Foxpaw!" All of ThunderClan cheered the names of the clan's two newest apprentices, heads raised to send their voices to the sky. Hollypaw cheered with her clan, watching Foxpaw and Icepaw sit proudly beside their new mentors. Whitewing was assigned to mentor Icepaw, their light coloured coats making the pairing a perfect fit. Foxpaw was matched with Rainwhisker, the older grey tom a quiet opposite to Foxpaw's boundless energy. Hollypaw nodded to herself. These choices were a part of being leader.

            Her brothers sat beside her, Jaypaw still looking tired from his night-time escapade the night before. Hollypaw peered at him, but he was staring blankly away from her. It was hard to tell with his blind eyes, but Hollypaw knew her brother was miles away from the present. She sighed and shared a knowing look with Lionpaw, who sat in his regular place on Jaypaw's other side. They had both agreed that today they were going to confront Jaypaw about what had happened.

            "Hollypaw! Jaypaw! Lionpaw!" A cheerful call interrupted her from her thoughts as Foxpaw and Icepaw came barrelling towards them.

            "Congratulations!" Lionpaw purred, standing up excitedly. "You two have both got incredible mentors!"

            "You think so?" Foxpaw asked, his whiskers twitching. "Rainwhisker said Icepaw and I could go explore the territory once we get a place sorted out in the apprentices den."

            "And you want help so you can get going?" Jaypaw piped up, amused.

            "Yes please!" Icepaw meowed.

            "Alright alright," Hollypaw laughed. "Come on, let's see if we can't get you two a spot."

            "Ugh," Jaypaw groaned as he stood up. "The apprentices' den is packed enough as it is. I wish Firestar would hurry up and make new warriors."

            Hollypaw bumped his shoulder good-naturedly as the five of them headed to the den beneath the yew bush. "Then Berrypaw would never shut up about it," she meowed.

            Slipping into the den, Hollypaw found it empty in the wake of the clan meeting. She studied it for the first time since she'd been made an apprentice, her eyes narrowing as her brothers and the two new apprentices squished into the den. Almost every inch of the den was covered in moss and other soft bedding.

            "Wow, is there really no room?" Icepaw breathed, looking around with wide eyes.

            "There is an unusual amount of apprentices this new-leaf," Hollypaw reasoned. "It will be cramped but I'm sure you guys can find a spot just fine." She took a few steps into the den, and spotted a small indent near the outer branches where the two apprentices could squeeze into. "How about here?"

            "So close to the outside?" Icepaw meowed.

            "It's still protected, and it's only temporary." Lionpaw took a few steps forward. "I can help you haul in some moss tonight and make sure its extra warm for you."

            "I'll help too," Jaypaw meowed. "I'd like some moss for my own nest anyways."

            "Thank you!" Foxpaw meowed, his tail waving happily. His gaze lingered on Jaypaw before switching over to Lionpaw, eyes bright and genuine. "Really! We missed you guys."

            "We did too," Hollypaw purred. She pointed to the entrance with her nose. "You two better get a move on, you don't want your mentors to start worrying. We can build your nests when you get back."

            "Oh yeah!" Icepaw squealed and bounded out the den. "I can't wait! Let's go look at the lake, Foxpaw!"

            "I wonder if we could try and catch a fish?" Foxpaw meowed, following his sister.

            The den was quiet when they left, and Jaypaw let out a huge sigh. "Well," he meowed, shaking his fur, "Brightheart's giving me some battle training, and I don't want to keep her waiting." He headed towards the den entrance.

            "Jaypaw, wait," Hollypaw stepped forwards. Jaypaw stopped, listening. "We need to talk to you," she meowed. "You know that, right?"

            "Yeah," Jaypaw sighed. "Yeah. I'm sorry, I'll explain everything. Just- later, okay?"

            "Tonight, then," Lionpaw meowed. "Behind the medicine cat's den."

            Jaypaw purred. "We might be getting too big for that spot, but yeah. I'll be there." He nodded, as if steeling himself, and disappeared back into the camp.

            "He seems better," Lionpaw commented. "Less 'dark and stormy'."

            "Let's hope it stays that way, Lionpaw." Hollypaw replied softly before heading out of the den.

***

            The sun was setting, bathing the world in a deep orange. Hollypaw lay in the camp, her mother and father chatting idly beside her. The rocks beneath her were quickly growing cold, and the blue shadows cast by the sun were stunningly chilled, holding the promise of dew.

            Hollypaw ran her tongue in between her toes and claws, cleaning out any trace of dirt. She was waiting for her brothers to come back from training; Sorreltail made her practice climbing trees all day, and her muscles were sore and tired from it. Her body wanted sleep, but her brain was still buzzing. Again today, she noticed that she could see things before they happened, helping her to catch prey before she'd even registered what she'd seen.

            "Hollypaw, knock it off," Squirrelflight meowed, thumping her tail down briefly on Hollypaw's head and breaking her out of her thoughts. "I've been watching you clean the same paw for what feels like _moons_."

            "Aw, but I'm bored!" Hollypaw groaned, flipping over onto her back. "Jaypaw and Lionpaw aren't back from training yet."

            "Well," Brambleflower purred, tilting his head to meet her eyes. "Why don't you tell us what you got up to today?"

            Hollypaw let out a purr, rolling back over and sitting up. "Sorreltail had me climbing trees all day, we were running around like squirrels."

            "Tree climbing!" Brambleflower laughed. "I was always bad at that. Did you manage to catch any prey up there?"

            Hollypaw nodded. "Caught a few birds."

            "Sorreltail told me you have a great talent for spotting prey," Squirrelflight purred. "She was saying you always seemed to catch them before even she had spotted them."

            "Well, maybe," Hollypaw purred. Brambleflower's eyes suddenly focused on the entrance to the camp, and Hollypaw turned to watch Brackenfur and Sorreltail walk into camp, pelts brushing together. Brackenfur turned and padded across the camp to meet them, his tail in the air.

            "Hey, you two!" Brackenfur meowed, "The both of you are on the evening patrol. We've doubled patrols along the WindClan border."

            "We did?" Brambleflower asked. "I thought we'd decided against that? Won't it look like we are rising to their bait?"

            "Firestar wants some extra eyes out," Brackenfur meowed.

            "Why don't the extra patrols leave no scent markers? That way it will still be watched, but it will seem like we weren't bothered by them marking the borders."

            "Oh!" Brackenfur considered this for a moment, then nodded. "Good idea, I'll pass that along. Patrols should probably stay a fox-length or two back from the border, so WindClan won't see us patrolling. Thanks, Brambleflower! Take Mousepaw and Spiderleg with you, as well." Brackenfur turned to Hollypaw with a purr. "Sorreltail said you worked really hard today, so you have the night off." He nodded a swift goodbye before turning and trotting towards Firestar, relaying the patrol plans.

            Hollypaw purred to herself; Brackenfur seemed to be impressed with her. She hoped his approval would continue to grow.

            When Hollypaw turned back to her father, his amber eyes were still on his leader and Brackenfur, Hollypaw was surprised to see Brambleflower take on a wistful expression, almost longing. She was proud of his suggestion to Brackenfur, and how Brackenfur and Brambleflower seemed to get along so well. Brambleflower seemed to miss making those decisions for himself, and from what Hollypaw had seen, he was good at it, too.

            "Hey dad?" Hollypaw meowed, getting his attention.

            "Yes, my dear?" He responded, turning his attention to her.

            "Why did you step down from being deputy?"

            "Huh?" Brambleflower blinked, surprised. "Where did this come from?"

            "Well, just now you were looking at Brackenfur and Firestar... and it almost seemed like you missed it."

            "You're sharp!" Brambleflower laughed, meeting Squirrelflight's eyes nervously. She nodded pointedly at Brambleflower, who sighed.

            "I enjoyed being deputy, Hollypaw, but it wasn't for me." Brambleflower met her eyes, and she saw sadness lingering there. "Ambition... it runs in the family, I suppose. And while I was doing everything I could to help Firestar and ThunderClan, I was realizing that maybe my ambition wasn't good for me. I couldn't stomach the thought of becoming leader, not after what I experienced with Tigerstar and..." Brambleflower closed his eyes. "Hawkfrost..."

            "Hawkfrost got what he deserved," Squirrelflight interjected sharply.

            "Hawkfrost was my brother," Brambleflower said, grimacing and looking away. "He made his mistakes, but I loved him," Brambleflower's face grew soft, remembering the better times with his younger brother. "He was so clever and funny, I think you would have liked him, Hollypaw."

            This surprised her. Hollypaw knew the basics of the story, the scars on her father's face a reminder of his falling out with his brother, but she'd never actually heard Brambleflower speak fondly of him. Hollypaw's heart squeezed at the sorrowful expression her father wore; she couldn't imagine how painful it would be to lose a sibling.

            "You loved him? Have you forgotten what he did to your leader, _my_ father?" Squirrelflight hissed. Hollypaw winced. Her mother's hot temper lashed out like a viper, quick and venomous.

            "He was being manipulated," Brambleflower started. "We both-"

            "He was just a pawn of Tigerstar," Squirrelflight rolled her eyes. "Honestly, he doesn't deserve half the grief you feel for him."

            "He was still my brother," Brambleflower snapped, face growing hard again. "He was there when I needed him most, and I'll always love him for that."

            Squirrelflight huffed shook her head, sending Hollypaw an exasperated look. Brambleflower stared off into a corner of the camp, and she had a sinking feeling that her parents had this argument often.

            Hollypaw pondered, slightly confused. Didn't Tigerstar die long before Hawkfrost? She didn't know what Squirrelflight was chastising him for, but she knew Hawkfrost was from RiverClan. Maybe, by being so close to him, Brambleflower was breaking the Warrior Code?

            Heaving a huge sigh, Brambleflower turned back to Hollypaw. "I'm sorry, little one," he meowed, his eyes weary. "I stepped down after my brother died, for multiple reasons, but Hawkfrost's death... humbled me. When you're older I promise to tell you and your brothers the whole story." His ears perked up, and he let out a soft purr. "Speaking of, you were waiting for them, weren't you?"

            Hollypaw turned to see Lionpaw and Jaypaw slip into camp, each of them carrying a huge wad of moss. They were followed closely by Icepaw and Foxpaw; they must have run into them on patrol. She stood and turned back to her parents.

            "There they are! Bye, mom, dad!" She purred. Squirrelflight waved her tail, her face turned away as she worked on cleaning her long pelt. Brambleflower blinked warmly at her.

            "Don't get into trouble!" He called as Hollypaw bounded towards her littermates, tail in the air. She skid to a halt in front of Jaypaw, who flinched back when he sensed her.

            "Finally, you're back!" She purred, walking with them to the apprentices den.

            "Mmmmffff," Lionpaw grunted, his mouth stuffed full of moss and his eyes shining. Hollypaw laughed and held the branches that obscured the entrance to the den up with her paw, allowing the other apprentices to slip in and dump the moss. The den was cool and quiet, empty and inviting.

            "Wow, we managed to carry a lot," Icepaw meowed, batting some moss from her brother's whiskers.

            "Enough to make your nests, for sure," Lionpaw meowed.

            "Sorry I couldn't help, did you run into each other on patrol?" Hollypaw asked, moving some of the moss into place, shoring up the side closest to the camp to help keep some of the wind out.

            "Yeah," Jaypaw meowed, following Icepaw and Foxpaw in helping her build the nests. Hollypaw watched as his paws moved delicately, using touch to fit the moss together and build up from the ground. "We decided to just bring back the moss, rather than come get you first." He nodded.

            "Yeah, with how much Lionpaw can carry we have enough to pad your nests, too," Foxpaw purred brightly.

            "On it!" Lionpaw purred, placing some of the moss into their nests.

            Hollypaw listened while Foxpaw and Icepaw chattered on about their day, building the nests until they were warm and tempting. Jaypaw took a step back and began to clean his claws, listening as Foxpaw described Rainwhisker's advice for hunting. She was surprised to see Jaypaw in such a good mood, even if he was a tad bit grouchy.

            "You guys get something to eat," Hollypaw meowed during a lull in the conversation, standing and shaking her fur. "Just make sure Daisy has something to eat first!"

            "Okay," Icepaw meowed, stretching her arms. "I'm beat!" She shook out her light grey coat and padded out of the den, Foxpaw following close.

            "Okay, let's go," Hollypaw meowed once the two new apprentices were out of earshot.

            "We should go in separately," Lionpaw meowed. "So it's not suspicious."

            Jaypaw snorted out a laugh. "I'm sure we're not the only ones who know of that spot," Jaypaw flicked his tail over Lionpaw's flank. "But sure, you should go first, big guy."

            "Alright," Lionpaw meowed, trotting out of the den. Jaypaw stood and stretched a bit before turning to Hollypaw.

            "Are you alright?" He asked. "I've been meaning to say, you've seemed troubled recently."

            "Oh," Hollypaw blinked, then let out a purr. "I'm okay, Jay, I just miss you guys. Been a long moon of training." _I'll tell them about the visions when I know more,_ she decided.

            "Sorry," Jaypaw meowed immediately, then shook his head. "It has, hasn't it?" He gave her a low purr. "Let's go, Lionpaw's getting antsy."

            "I'll follow you," Hollypaw promised, leaving the den beside him. She sat down at the edge of the camp, carefully watching as Jaypaw made his way to the back of the camp, disappearing behind the rocky outcrop that formed the medicine cat den. She eyed Leafpool sitting in front of her den, her and Sorreltail busy catching up and cleaning their fur. The sun had set behind the mountains, and the clearing had quickly been thrown into shade, the sky making everything seem blue. The chatter of her clanmates set her heart at ease, everything calm and normal.

            After a little while, Hollypaw stood and padded to the back of the camp, climbing over the small rock pile that covered the entrance to the small cave in the camp wall. She shook out her fur, pleased to find that there was still plenty of room with her and her siblings all squished together.

            "It's still big enough!" Lionpaw meowed quietly, lying on the cold dirt with Jaypaw beside him. Jaypaw looked slightly uncomfortable, but Hollypaw knew that was because he was the topic of their meeting and not their hiding place.

            "Jaypaw," Hollypaw began, curling her paws under her and watching her smaller brother intently. "We both want to know what happened yesterday."

            Jaypaw nodded and let out a soft sigh. "I went to the moon pool to visit StarClan," he began. Hollypaw's claws curled in surprise.

            "That's against the warrior code!" Hollypaw exclaimed.

            "I had to ask if I could be a warrior."

            "And?" Lionpaw breathed. Hollypaw closed her eyes. She knew the answer.

            "And she said no," Jaypaw meowed bitterly. "She told me that being a medicine cat was my destiny."

            "Who said this?" Hollypaw meowed. "Didn't Firestar already say you could be a warrior?" _The word of a clan leader is law, after all,_ she thought.

            "Spottedleaf," Jaypaw shook his head. "And yeah, Firestar is making me take a moon to decide."

            "Spottedleaf? The cat who save you when you were a kit?" Hollypaw questioned.

            "Well, I wouldn't say she _saved_ me," Jaypaw growled. "She's been hounding my dreams ever since."

            "But you don't have to follow StarClan's advice, right?" Lionpaw sounded worried. "Firestar said you can be a warrior, so that's that, right?"

            "I don't know if I _can_ be a warrior," Jaypaw meowed. Then he shifted, his eyes burning. "I'm going to try my hardest though. Brightheart promised to train me, and I promised to try my best."

            "You can do it," Lionpaw meowed. "I know you can, you're more brilliant than any cat I know!" Lionpaw placed his muzzle on Jaypaw's head for a moment. "I'm glad you worked things out with Brightheart, she's an amazing warrior. She'll help you be amazing, too."

            Hollypaw sighed and shuffled closer, forcing her way into the embrace.

            "Next time you're feeling so much doubt," Hollypaw murmured, "let us know, okay?"

            "I know," Jaypaw purred. "I'm sorry."

            The three of them sat like that for a while before they all left, one at a time. Hollypaw sat in there by herself for a moment, collecting herself. Brambleflower told her he stepped down because he had _too much_ ambition. She wondered, then, if her wanting to be leader was wrong. She recounted the warrior code in her head, memorized perfectly from her recent training. She thought about the stories told to her about Tigerstar, and how his ambition to be leader led him down the wrong path. She stood up and crawled from the cave, padding towards the apprentices den. Before she entered, she tilted her head up and looked at the stars, sparkling bright with the almost-full moon looking back at her.

            _I am not Tigerstar,_ she thought, _and neither is my father. If Brambleflower can choose to step down, then maybe I can choose to step up._ She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath. _I need to be the best warrior I can be, better than my father and his father before him._ She purred to herself, ducking under the swooping branches and curling up beside her brothers. _If Jaypaw can decide his own destiny, I can too._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay! School has me held hostage and I've had a couple of health issues to deal with, but with recovery comes time to write! :3


End file.
